<p>so i know some of you say you didnt make any friends or whatever at cornell…but i’d like to ask if anyone’s been in my situation…</p>
<p>you made a friend but now you kind of regret coming so close with that person…and would like to cut ties but not do so in a rude manner…it doesnt help that this person and i hooked up…</p>
<p>halp?! :<</p>
<p>Okay, wow… First lets start with, I’ve become to close to people and regretted it afterwards. If they have a level of emotional maturity, and you don’t want to completely remove them from your life, a simple conversation about monopolization of time and expanding social circles will usually work. Most guys I know, that have grown up, don’t really trip if a friend of theirs says “Hey man, we’re hanging out a lot lately. I think we need to spend a little less time together.”</p>
<p>Now all that being said, when you hook up with said friend and then decide you are spending too much time together it’s a different animal entirely (speaking from my experience in relationships with women, not sure if this would translate perfectly to a non-hetero relationship). When you cross that particular barrier with a “friend” and that friend still wants to spend gobs of time together (or worse, encourages continued hook-ups) you’re now involved with someone in a relationship. Might not be the traditional boyfriend-boyfriend thing but it’s still an emotional attachment (for at least one involved member).</p>
<p>At this point, be very gentle but firm, it’s no use trying to avoid hurt feelings because, if I’m reading this right, the feelings are already involved for him. If you don’t completely cut contact make sure you don’t continue hooking up (unless you spell out an explicit understanding with this person or don’t really care about their emotions there’s a good chance it will confuse things even worse). The longer you let it go the worse it will be.</p>
<p>she wants your babies man.</p>
<p>lmao @ RabbitHole I’m lost.</p>
<p>when did Resurgam say he was gay?</p>
<p>Unless Resurgam’s “sexile and orientation” thread meant that.</p>
<p>There’s also the non-mature route: **** the person off until he/she doesn’t want to be your friend/lover anymore. A large quantity of alcohol will expedite the process. Hooking up with someone else while consuming said alcohol is also helpful. </p>
<p>Or just say you need some time apart. Tell him/her it’s personal if you don’t want to tell the person the real reason.</p>
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<p>As much as I love this idea, he did say he wanted to do it in a non-rude manner…</p>
<p>this whole thing started with a hookup but the hookups stopped soon enough but this person and i became friends…</p>
<p>do you think this person put out just to land a friend? that’s what i’m thinking…</p>
<p>I’ve heard of crack-whores, and money-whores, but I’ve never heard of a friend-whore before. Most people try to avoid hooking up with their friends. This person probably wanted you to be more than a friend, and seems to think you are, from the vague details you’ve given us. Just tell this person that you would like some space for a while.</p>
<p>Sapere, it might be rude, but it’s effective!</p>
<p>Here’s my advice:</p>
<p>Stay away from that person for 2-3 days. When you meet him/her again, act very different and let him/her know that you’ve suffered some kind of change. Stop being affectionate to the person and be more like a friend. If he/she seems confused and asks for an explanation, say you went through a revelation or whatever and you just cannot see yourself with him/her anymore…or that you feel you’d both gain so much from just being friends :)</p>
<p>well i dont think he sees me as more than a friend, i think his problem is that he feels soo lonely and clings to me…</p>
<p>he always compliments me on the amount of acquaintances/friends i have…</p>