<p>Hi! So at the moment my top choice is Cal Poly SLO. I was wondering how to make friends in college, any college, not just Cal Poly. I plan to be a computer science major, which I realize is a hard major and will require a lot of studying. I think I want to rush but I am not completely sure yet. I just want to know how to strike up a conversation with people. How do I not make it awkward? How do you carry on a conversation for a while and make a friend out of it? Is it easier to make friends in college? Will people judge me based on my major and sorority? Do people normally have a main group of friends or is it more like having friends everywhere you go? Is it harder to become friends with the upperclassmen or the “popular” sport athletes?
Also, what is dating like in college? Do people typically date freshman year? And if they do is it a serious relationship? Is it like in high school where they hold hands most the time?
Sorry for the myriad of questions I am just extremely excited for college and can’t believe I have to wait a whole year until I get to attend, given that I will be a senior in high school this year.
Thank you so much for your help and advice!</p>
<p>There’s a quaint, old book (maybe it’s been updated) called How to Win Friends and Influence People. Might be a good time to read it, just as a kick.</p>
<p>I read the book “The Naked Roomate” for college advice before I started freshman year. I can’t answer the dating questions, but I can give you my opinion on others.</p>
<p>How do I not make it awkward? It’s a hit and miss effort, honestly. It’s only awkward when you focus on how awkward you are. The best conversation starters is a question based on a surrounding situation. In class, you could go “Hey, can I sit here?” to a classmate, and sometimes casually ask “Hey can I borrow your notes for a moment?” to the same classmate. </p>
<p>How do you carry on a conversation for a while and make a friend out of it? It’s a social norm that silence means a conversation is dying. I just start bringing up random topics that seem relate-able to the person I’m chatting with. If I sense a connection going, I just ask “Well, I’m sorry if I took much of your personal time, but it would be cool if we could hang-out again in the future.” </p>
<p>Is it easier to make friends in college? It’s easier if you force yourself to be around people. Someone is bound to be assertive enough to ask “Hey, what are you up to?” </p>
<p>Will people judge me based on my major and sorority? Yes and yes. A lot of people form first impressions based off them. Will it matter? Not really. Everyone has their own interests. Friends are the people who accept who you are and enjoy your company. </p>
<p>Do people normally have a main group of friends or is it more like having friends everywhere you go? It depends on your personality. I’m more of the latter since I forced myself to talk to people through attending every first student org meeting that provided food. One month after that endeavor, the people who I kept on re-seeing on an almost daily basis became my main group of friends. However once in a while, I chat up with someone from an organization that I didn’t join. </p>
<p>Is it harder to become friends with the upperclassmen or the “popular” sport athletes? Again, it’s depends on your personality. My freshman year I became friends with a computer science senior who was the volunteer coordinator of this organization I joined. He was actually the assertive one who started the friendship. It began with chitchat at a meeting to monthly poker at his apartment. Through a facebook friendmaker group, I met a sophomore that plays for the school’s Quidditch team. Although I rarely see him on campus, occasionally I study in a dorm lobby and he’s there also studying. We normally have small chitchat. </p>