<p>Maybe you could use it as an educational opportunity. If your kids are unfamiliar with minor surgery (didn’t they have their wisdom teeth removed?), they need to know about the arrangements you have to make (like having someone available to drive you home and pick up your prescriptions). And if they have never had the experience of having to wait for test results, they need to learn about that, too. </p>
<p>On the other hand, I can’t even remember what I did the last time this happened to me (it involved a biopsy and later a minor surgical procedure to remove a skin cancer). They were both away at school. I’m not sure whether I ever mentioned it. So I may have missed a useful educational opportunity; I was too preoccupied with how icky the bandage looked (the skin cancer was right next to my eye).</p>
<p>If your kids are unfamiliar with minor surgery (didn’t they have their wisdom teeth removed?)</p>
<p>I need lots of reminders :o- I am going to make an dentist appt for my D over break ( older one had two removed- but it was general anesthesia)</p>
<p>I still think you should have all your papers updated and tell kids where that is- if the biopsy isn’t for a month- it isn’t necessarily connected- they should know where that stuff is anyway.</p>
<p>When my DD left for several years overseas, we had a conversation with all our kids asking them what they wanted to know and when and how.</p>
<p>Many years ago we put down our dog (age 16) and the kids were young (6-11) so we did not tell them until afterl; big mistake, they were offended, especially the oldest who, in hindsight, should have gone with me to be in the room. We were more focused on ourselves and our lifelong dog and did not realise how much it was a huge thing to the kids.</p>
<p>We have had a grandparent die, a dog need surgery, an ER visit, a major surgery with an oncologist, a minor surgery, and an uncle die since that conversation. It was good to know who wanted to hear what and how. I tended to email little bits as I learned them with the oncology thing and perhaps at times it was too much info, but they could be certain they were informed of all of it as it unfolded, per their request. We even got instructions such as Mom tells us about people and Dad tells us about pets.</p>
<p>I did not contact them to say, “hey, I am having an MRI today” or other minutia, unless I happened to talk to one of them. It turned out all three kids were out of the country when much of this was unfolding and we had not anticipated most of the above happenings when we had that conversation; it was a fortuitous thing we knew their feelings.</p>
<p>I was surprised that my DH called them when I was in the ER for about 12 hours, I would have waited until we knew something to call. </p>
<p>I also wonder about this stuff with the old folks, how much should I ask etc?</p>
<p>I didn’t tell my kids I was having my bone cancer removal surgery until after it was done. In fact, I didn’t tell anyone, really, that I was having it done (except my husband and two very close friends). Both kids were in the middle of their college graduation weeks and I didn’t want to rain on their fun–in fact, my son’s graduation (which he didn’t attend) was the day of my surgery.</p>
<p>I can answer that both ways of telling or not telling your kids. I went thru a battery of tests when my girls were in hs , due to an abnormal mammogram. I never did tell them anything because I didn’t want to worry / distract them from school. All turned out ok , but had there been cancer found, I wouldn’t have kept it from them
I did just have a minor surgical procedure done just this week and I told all of my girls. I figured that going under general anesthesia was enough of a risk to not keep it from them. I am wondering if th OP is having the same surgery as I just had ? Please feel free to PM me !</p>
<p>Since the surgery is not until January, I would tell them over the break.</p>
<p>I had a problem this fall and since cancer was a possibility I elected to tell the kids that I was undergoing tests and would keep them posted. It wasn’t exam time though.</p>
<p>My bigger concern was how much to tell my 80 y/o mother. Should I wait until I had results or tell her I was having a problem? A few years ago I has some tests and told her afterwards and she was hurt that I had “kept a secret from me”. She felt like she was helping even if it was to worry from a distance. So this time I told her ahead of time like I did with the kids.</p>
<p>Results were non cancer but still serious. The kids don’t bring it up much but my mom worries and asks how I am feeling and although I don’t want her to worry it is nice to know she is there (900 miles away) sending me positive thoughts of healing.</p>
<p>busyparent, I did not hesitate to tell my 80 y/o mother. She worries, but not too much. She wanted to go to the hospital with me, but I told her that it is best for her not to go. I don’t need her sitting there and picking up germs from all of the sick people! I told her that we will let her know as soon as the procedure is over.</p>
<p>I am sorry that are you need to go through some serious health problems. I am sending good vibes your way!</p>
<p>Thanks Rubymom. I feel very fortunate compared to all the cancer stories on CC. Like on the other thread it is a case of going from always healthy to not so much but it also helped me put some of the smaller stuff into perspective so all in all lemonade out of lemons.</p>
<p>I wouldn’t tell them about this, as it’s diagnostic. If the results unfortunately come back with bad news, that will likely mean you will need more surgery, which is when I would tell them. </p>
<p>My story is my dad was admitted to the hospital when I was in college and my parents didn’t tell me until months later. This was the beginning of a heart condition that eventually killed him. Given my mom has no science background (never took biology) and is a doctor-phobe, she never questioned anything the doctors said. Fast forward 10 years, my dad collapses, is in ICU and she has no clue how to interpret anything the doctors are saying. I have to rush there from hours away and ask the tough questions and translate the answers to her in plain English. (I’m a volunteer EMT). </p>
<p>Bottom line, please be up-front with your kids with known serious medical conditions so they can educate themselves to be your advocate when the time comes.</p>
<p>My kids would be disappointed if I didn’t tell them. But, then again, they wouldn’t particularly worry if I told them in was minor. If I didn’t tell them and they found out, they would think I was hiding something.</p>
<p>Since they are going to be home before then, and you aren’t making a call to school to make a ‘formal announcement’ where they may be more alarmed, tell them over the break. Be matter of fact. They will be fine. Things of this nature, while not fun, no longer strike fear in people as they understand the diagnostic nature of it. Your kids should feel that this is a normal part of health care.</p>
<p>Your intentions are good, you love your kids and don’t want to frighten them. I think you can communicate the information without scaring them.</p>