My kid is on grad school visits. Last night she was at a dinner with profs and students. Her name tag (on a lanyard) had slipped inside her v-neck shirt. A male prof reached into the front of her shirt to pull it out. She was too shocked to smack his hand, but is angry & embarrassed. School was off her list anyway by that point, and wasn’t her potential PI, but c’mon.
Then on her flight home today – guy next to her pulls out the SI swimsuit issue, asks if she has seen it before, and starts showing her his favorite shots. She was in the window seat. (My instruction to her when she told me afterward was next time to ring for the stew, tell them what is happening, and ask to please be moved or traded to another seat).
Are these people just newly emboldened or what? X(
Wow. Both suck. The plane thing is just some random person and no doubt there are some creeps out there. But a professor at a university should certainly know better and I’m sure has had training about what is and isn’t appropriate.
Wow! That’s really offensive. If she’s not going to go to that U anyway, after accepting wherever she opts to go, I’d let the U know about that inappropriate contact!
If it were me I would send him an email telling him that his actions were inappropriate, not appreciated and that he should take more care in how he represents his university.
Yeah. She was creeped out. I’m pretty glad she had already taken this school off her list for other reasons. @sylvan8798 , you are probably right about it being the wrong phrase. It is just straight up sexual harassment.
I think it was inappropriate but why was her name tag inside her shirt? It must have been a very short lanyard. Even then the prof should not have had to reach into the shirt to flip it out but I am going to mention this too our event coordinator to make sure we don’t buy lanyards that are so short that the name part would slip into women’s shirts. Seriously.
I would call that “inappropriate touching” which is a euphamism for something else. If the prof’s fly was unzipped, would a woman grab the zipper and pull it up? The guy on the plane is a whole different category, but should have been given a “no, I am not interested” and respected that.
Just ask her name or say it’s hard to read the tag; very easy fix. Name tags get covered by sweaters or jackets, fall off, and turn frequently. Who reaches into someone’s clothing in a professional setting, apart from a medical emergency?
He shouldn’t have touched her. If he couldn’t see her nametag and wanted to know her name, he should have asked her.
@NJres, can’t imaging any woman would WANT to help a guy zip his fly. Regarding the guy on the plane, apparently she told him, “I don’t like sports” and ignored him after that. But that conversation should not be necessary.
HE REACHED INSIDE OF HER SHIRT?! Who the hell would do that?
No, it’s not “paternal.” It’s a violation of space and borderline something else.
This is what happens when we don’t teach people from a young age that their bodies are their own and NO ONE is entitled to touch it without our permission. It’s a cultural problem as well as an individual one.