<p>I am too cheap to pay 10/mon, 30 data service is killing me already. My kids know I am very resourceful. It’s less painful if they just keep in touch. D1 said, “I call my mom regularly, so she doesn’t call me when I don’t want her.” It works for me.</p>
<p>My 20-yr-old regularly uses Twitter, so I started an account just to follow his tweets. This was particularly useful when he drove cross-country back from school this year: I could see where he’d been and knew he was alive and well. Before Twitter, we would depend on his younger brother to txt him, if we hadn’t heard from him lately. I like the passive ability to see that he’s okay (and where he is!) by checking Twitter.</p>
<p>Oaklandmom:</p>
<p>I just saw this thread today and am glad that you finally heard back from your DS. My DS did the same thing to me, so I know how you feel. Why all boys are like that??? I used similar tricks like others mentioned here on this board and it works for me every time DS, you are the only boy I have. It scares me when you dont reply. R U okay?? I am worry to death. Love, M. In my experience, threatening email or voicemail, wont do a thing for you. Now, I can also feel for your relief.</p>
<p>I have my DS trained. Periodically, and more frequently when traveling" he texts me, “am alive.” or “landed safely” or “still alive.” He knows my anxieties! ;)</p>
<p>Darn it! Don’t these kids know they are our hearts walking around??? ;-)</p>
<p>I expect to get paid back big time - I didn’t have the campus life experience - grew up in a very strict home, went to CC and lived (in my still very strict) home. Moved out when I was 21 and hardly called home. I feel really, really guilty about that to this day. Although I loved my parents, we weren’t on the same wavelength (not that that is a good excuse!)</p>
<p>As a parent of a rising HS senior, I am hoping against hope that I am wrong about that payback. :-/</p>
<p>I can’t believe I’m disagreeing with jym who posted, “All we parents need to know is that they are safe.”
That just doesn’t cut it for me. I want a relationship with my offspring not just a status check!! Safety, although certainly most important, is just the tip of the iceberg.</p>
<p>^^^ LOL woody!!
I was agreeing with the parents who at least want to know their kids are breathing!! When my older s was in Nicaragua, there was an alert that there were some problems in the area they were in, and I had no way to reach him. Scared me. I did have a contact he had provided to me who is down there, and works for the state dept. I sent a very general “is everything ok down there” email, and she replied back that she’d contact the local police and send in search and rescue troops if I wanted :eek: NOOO!!! I told her all I needed to know at that point was that he was ok. </p>
<p>I do agree with you though-- I would love to know more than the “tip of the iceberg” , but with my guys, I take what I can get. One is much more disclosing than the other. With my older one, we talk about lots of stuff. Younger one is more private. I am trying to respect that, though it drives me nuts. However, when he tells me a little bit, I have a tendency to take that as an invitation to ask more questions, which he likens to the spanish inquisition! So yesterday he <em>finally</em> told me he broke up with his gf of 2 1/2 yrs. I told him I was sorry to hear that, and glad he shared this… but that I already knew. We parents have “ways” of knowing this stuff…</p>
<p>^^^I didnt tell him right away that I already knew. It came up later in our conversation. In retrospect, I wish I hadnt have mentioned that. Oh well. However, id did lead to more conversation (because he wanted to know how I knew… 
)</p>
<p>Its is the nature of males to gradually move away from their mothers and search for their own companionships. I am quite certain that none of the mothers here would seek a male who calls his mom as often as they want their children to call home. You want grandchildren, don’t you?</p>
<p>The reason why I’m close to my childhood home is because the weather is much nicer than anywhere else in the world. Also because, W kicks me out of the house often.</p>
<p>I have the opposite problem. S calls nearly every day. D likes to disappear, for weeks.</p>
<p>
Funny, longprime.</p>
<p>A friend of H has an agreement with her D who is a Grad. student. If she does not make a move in three days, on their online chess game he has to call her.
He said that’s the only way to keep in touch, without prying. My heart ached went he told me that, because he adores her, and she is his only child.</p>
<p>Glad to learn of the contact, oaklandmom.
When we’ve had long periods of no contact, hubby leaves a voice message, email +/or text quote from the movie Cool Runnings, ‘Hey Sanka-mon?’
In the movie, the next line is ‘You dead?’</p>
<p>oaklandmom, I’m glad you were able to get in touch with your son. One thing I wanted to add is that socializing (and that often includes after hours drinking) is very much part of the work culture in Japan. There are even special rental spaces (like pods) to crash in if you’ve missed the last train home. Fortunately, Japan is generally very safe.</p>
<p>thanks, mousegray, I’m glad to know there are other options when he stays out late and misses the last train. In deed from his online journal there is lots of after hours drinking. And I am also so glad to have it reconfirmed that Japan is generally very safe.</p>