MathMOM, I do not like such fitted dresses. Nic &Zoe has more forgiving dresses.
OP! Did u see the Tadishi light blue dress I mentioned?
@VeryHappy , I LOVE the navy dress. It’s so elegant. But then I read some more and wow! on the second dress, light blue. The third one is amazing!
I got some feedback from the couple to keep it more casual than what I had been looking at. So that Tahari that @consolation posted is a reasonable alternative. Sigh. I’m going to look at everything again with a fresh eye.
I still can’t post a link, but type Shoji lace overlay dress. $238 at nordstrum
Glad you got some feedback @VeryHappy. I wish someone would clue me in to what they want!
Maybe it’s me, but all those lace overlay dresses look scratchy to me, and a lot of them look generally stiff and uncomfortable to boot. The Tahari is feminine, confident, and relaxed. (Even though metallic.) When I hear rustic chic I’m thinking more along the lines of garden party than wedding hall. The ubiquitous navy lace dresses are wedding hall IMHO.
YMMV, obviously. 
I’ve tried on a bunch of dresses too. The lace on most I’ve tried is very soft…and not scratchy in the least. And not stiff either.
@thumper1, well that’s good. I guess it’s just that the pictures bring up bad childhood memories of scratchy lace, LOL!
I really prefer natural fibers. Most of the formal and evening/wedding clothes seem to be nylon/polyester. I’m always kind of amazed when I see dresses that cost $500+ made of polyester.
Agree on the natural fibers Consolation. I just thought I’d peek at this thread, as I was dress searching in ernest last night and this am. I ordered some things, and we shall see. Mother of groom here, and the wedding is in a month. I was working on the weight loss and have had a little success, and time is nigh. This wedding is rather informal, on the beach, though in Asia folks do tend to dress nicely. I have a few in a pinch dresses, but would like to be a little more excited about what I am wearing.
I was reading the comments regarding the lace, and most talk of it being non scratchy. I think the technology has vastly improved with synthetics recently.
The Tahari designs are very attractive. The bridesmades will be in dark blue, my go to color, so I am trying to figure out what else I can stand to wear. Green seems the next best choice. . The classic advice to wear beige, does little for my body or spirits.
I have never met a Tahari dress that was scratchy. Synthetics offer many advantages over cotton and linen: they do not wrinkle as easily, can drape better, can be more breathable and do not show sweat (think exercise clothing fabric).
I have the Maggy London dress that HImom linked in #119 that I bought for my sons’s wedding in October 2015. I liked it a lot - it was perfect for the occasion as it was not as formal/fancy as some weddings. It was comfortable and I felt like I looked good - what more could you ask for in a dress?! I am just now realizing that I will be wearing navy for both my kids’ weddings. It’s a good neutral color and looks much better on me than beige.
That Maggy London is very pretty. I tend to wear structured dresses like that when needed for any evening weddings, but I think I want something a little softer and less sheath-like for my S’s wedding. The venue calls for a little fun, but it is an evening wedding and the bride and her mom are planning for a relatively elegant ambiance. I started looking yesterday and saw the range of Shoji dresses at Bloomingdales and Lord & Taylor. They are very pretty, but nothing reached out to me. I’ll continue tomorrow. I have four months - I need to get moving.
I’m so glad this thread is still going. D3’s wedding is in 11 weeks and it’s really time for me to figure this out.
All I want is a long A-line dress with short sleeves, which shouldn’t be so hard. I’ve ordered and sent back two already because they were too heavy. I tried this because the silhouette is exactly what I want: http://www.dillards.com/p/alex-evenings-sequined-lace-rosette-rose-gown/504913852?di=04332008_zi_eggplant&categoryId=410&facetCache=pageSize%3D96%26beginIndex%3D0%26orderBy%3D1 I have it in the champagne, like the fit, and am waiting for the dove gray to arrive to see if I like the color better.
Still not sure about it because I’ve never worn sequins or appliques. I’d like this dress better if it were less blinged-out. One daughter (not the bride) is going to be unenthusiastic about it. I feel good in it and it’s going to take 11 weeks to find shoes that won’t make me want to chop my feet off by 8 PM. Stress! I don’t mind putting in time and effort to look nice, but the whole MOB thing is a lot of pressure.
@frazzled1 - I really like that dress! I had looked at it but it doesn’t come in anything smaller than a 6. I think the bling is subtle and pretty. Is the ceremony or pictures outdoors? I had fallen in love with one dress that I ordered but it had a lot of sequins (it wasn’t gaudy even though that makes it sounds as if it would be). My daughter’s ceremony will be outside (and hopefully sunny weather!) and I was concerned about sequins catching in the sunlight and being an issue in photos. I don’t know if that would be something for you to consider. And I am with you on the shoe thing! It’s going to take me a long time to find shoes that I like and are comfortable. I am hoping there will be more leeway with wearing a long dress in being able to get away with something more comfortable.
I must be the only person in the world who has no problem with shoes but can’t shop for clothes without major stress. Heels, flats, no worries. Long, short, sleeves, no sleeves…major paralysis! Thanks for posting all these great dress links. I’ve gotten terrific ideas and think I can begin somewhere beyond square 1 now.
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: Use Zappos for shoe shopping. You can order as many as you want, in a variety of sizes; try them on at home; and return – hassle free and at no cost – the ones you don’t want.
At my size – 5.5 – it’s the only way I can even find anything at all, much less find something I like and am comfortable in.
And their selection is huge.
@frazzled1 I think that dress is very pretty, and I agree with C3Baker about the bling. It comes in some gorgeous colors, too.
Totally agree with VH about using Zappos for shoes. I had alot of charges on my credit card from ordering so many possible shoes for S1’s wedding, but that was the only way to find a pair of comfortable, nice-looking shoes. The selections are endless, it seems, but you can narrow it down by size, color, and, most importantly for me, heel height. Once I got all the shoes home, I could wear the most likely ones for several hours at home to see which one made the most sense. The rest got returned easily. I’ve never had a pair of dress shoes that I’ve worn for so many hours, standing and dancing, and wasn’t carrying in my hand as I made my way back to the hotel.
I love this outfit. I wish someone would buy it. Perfect for a rustic chic fall wedding! 
http://www.bhldn.com/bridal-party-view-all-dresses/libby-top-louise-skirt
Or this:
http://www.bhldn.com/bridal-party-view-all-dresses/cleo-top-and-louise-skirt-hydrangea
BHLDN has a number of alternatives that are ladylike but not stodgy, and no aggressively youthful.
My daughter’s wedding is only 3 weeks out and until last night I didn’t have a dress. I was told it didn’t matter, long or short as long as it was in the green family. It is nearly impossible to find anything green that isn’t matronly. After the suggestion on this thread about Rent the Runway, I finally found this one. https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://www.renttherunway.com/shop/designers/slate__willow/green_printed_sequin_gown&ved=0ahUKEwitzLa2_sTTAhVkw1QKHcrNC2AQFggcMAA&usg=AFQjCNHu9ZMloR73XdX0XeX3r4I7mRzU0A. I ordered it last night, now I just need suggestions on chicken cutlets, as the back of the dress prohibits wearing a bra. Has anybody here had any luck with a particular brand of them? I am a 38 D if that makes a difference in recommendations.