<p>I knew little about newborns and had rarely seen anyone breastfeeding when I was growing up. So I took breastfeeding and childbirth classes during my first pregnancy. At the end of the childbirth class they showed us film of various births. After seeing that, I cried so hard as I was walking through the parking lot with H, just bawling and saying “I CAN’T do it!” over and over. (And he said, “but you WILL, of course you will!”)<br>
And I did. (And it was horrible.)But I did have natural childbirth, including homebirth, 3 more times after that one. Then I had 4 more deliveries with epidurals! I tell all pregnant women one word of advice, “EPIDURAL!” btw, I had no problem with weight gain–pretty much 25lbs every time, and away it went with the delivery and nursing)
Nursing my first child was very difficult and painful for about 3 weeks. I would have given up due to the pain, except we were in grad school and there was no way we could afford formula–I was desperate to make it work. So I just kept on going and finally the pain subsided. No major problems with nursing my other kids after that (except for the plugged ducts, yeast infections/cracked nipples, etc.) No, I don’t miss it at all. After my 7th child was born, a lactation consultant came in my hospital room and introduced herself.
I asked her if there was anything she wanted to know.</p>
<p>I was at a teaching hospital, with lots of patients on assistance, ( although I had private ins).
Initially I was in a shared room ( and we shared the bathroom with four women on the other side) not so much the fun, shuffling to the bathroom door ( I had a section) only to find the door was locked.
However, after D became quite ill, they found me a private! room ( I think it was the only one), and brought in a cot so H could stay there too.
Our insurance covered most everything pretty well which was great, cause we certainly didnt anticipate so many problems.</p>
<p>“No, I don’t miss it at all. After my 7th child was born, a lactation consultant came in my hospital room and introduced herself.
I asked her if there was anything she wanted to know”</p>
<p>Oh, that’s hilarious. I’ll bet she had a couple of questions…or left the room very quickly.</p>
<p>atomom—that is so cute. reminds me of when I was delivering my third, my ob/gyn kept coming in to check on me and kept saying, “you’ll never deliver this one, he’s too big”, well the third time he said this, I told him, look Dr. ------- I love you, but if all you’re gonna do is come in here and tell me I can’t do it, please don’t come in for a while. my labor nurse was a midwife from Ireland who completely believed I could do it. And I delivered him…all 10 lbs 7 oz of him. something to be said for the confidence one gains as a mother…</p>
<p>Strong work, myturnnow. #1 was 9lb 15 oz and #2 was 10 lbs 6 oz - on the upside, once they’re out they’re easier to take care of. :)</p>
<p>But, like nursing, each pregnancy and labor is different. One just can’t extrapolate from one’s own circumstances in saying what someone else should or shouldn’t do or how it might go for them.</p>
<p>“But, like nursing, each pregnancy and labor is different. One just can’t extrapolate from one’s own circumstances in saying what someone else should or shouldn’t do or how it might go for them”</p>
<p>True. But there’s good advice, and really, really bad advice.</p>
<p>Yes…epidurals all the way! You don’t get extra presents on Mother’s Day if you delivered without drugs.</p>
<p>I had C-sections, so drugs weren’t an option. When my doc said I couldn’t deliver a 9 pounder, I believed him…lol. But it was true, son’s head (by far the largest head in the nursery) was stuck in the birth canal. After that one, the next one was scheduled (now that was a dream delivery! It was like, wow, did I just have a baby?)</p>
<p>I have to chuckle at that post with the gal who got “everything paid for” because she was on medicaid. What a joke. </p>
<p>Twenty years ago when I was having babies, the hospital told me that they only got paid $300 a day for the neonates on Medicaid, so they had to (over)charge the private insurances $4000 a day to make up for it. Imagine how it is now. So that lady who was living in luxury at the H was doing it at the expense of those paying for private insurance.</p>
<p>I highly support attachment parenting AND extended breastfeeding.</p>
<p>On that note, that picture ticked me off. Basically…they take an oversized 3 yr old (who was almost 4) and dress him in fatigues. Put the mom in a slutty outfit that she maybe could exercise in, but otherwise, would not be seen in public in…and have the boy stand on a stool and suck her breast in that position. THEY sexualized the whole thing with the picture. To me, it does not even look like the kid is nursing. When my 2 yr olds were nursing (the oldest I nursed to) he was close to 25 pounds. He wore toddler outfits. He snuggled in my lap as my shirt was discretely pulled up. </p>
<p>You know…you can change the view of anything with different slanted wording or pictures and dress and such like that. But extended breastfeeding can be a beautiful thing. What was on that picture was more like slutty and wrong.</p>
<p>Well put, lmhk. I have resisted posting on this because it is such an emotionally charged issue. But I’m with you…I practiced extended breastfeeding, and it is a private act of nurturing. The Time cover grossly (in every sense of that word) distorted everything.</p>
<p>Yes, what Imkh said.</p>
<p>I nursed my two only for a few months so obviously I was not committed to extended breastfeeding. Even so, I completely doubted that the TIME cover was portraying the norm of mothers/children who did nurse into toddlerhood. Shame on TIME.</p>
<p>I’m a huge proponent of attachment parenting and extended nursing. I’m also a very tiny woman, so a toddler the size in the picture would be almost as big as I. That cover annoyed me greatly. Women can pick themselves and each other apart very well on their own. We don’t need the jerks at Time magazine to stir the pot.</p>
<p>RE posts 266 and 267: This is a case in point . . . epidurals can be great for some and no, you don’t get a prize for delivering drug free. However, once can’t say “get the epidural!” I did #1 drug free and half a day in decided on the epidural with #2 knowing how much farther I had to go - bad idea - blood pressure plummetted to 60/90 - anesthesiologist, charge nurse etc. in room in a flurry - 6 liters of IV fluid to stabilize - it was bad - yes, it didn’t hurt anymore, but it was not a good or safe thing thing for me.
It might be good for others and ease their labor or it might not. My point - I cannot extrapolate from my experience, it is too variable and everyone’s reaction will be different.</p>
<p>In response to the comment about the person on Medicaid receiving the royal treatment…</p>
<p>My mom was diagnosed with stage 4 colon cancer a few years back and had a a large portion resected. The hospital was out of private rooms, so she was placed in a semi-private room. Because she had some major complications, the nurses allowed me to stay day and night and sleep in a chair. It was very difficult NOT to hear all of the conversations which occurred with the other patient in the room, a 20 year old who had suffered an ectopic pregnancy and had her tube repaired. She kept the tv on 24 hours a day and had her four young children, boyfriend, and mother visiting all day long. Each time they brought her tray of food she would feed it to her visitors and then complain that her food was cold and have another tray delivered. The icing on top of the cake was hearing her plan with her boyfriend to tell the doctor she wasn’t ready to go home after four days…yes four days…because if she stayed a certain number of days in the hospital she would receive free rent on her apartment through her government assistance. I’m sorry, but if a person is physically able to create, give birth to, and raise four children by age 20 and become pregnant with a fifth, they really don’t deserve to do so on my tax dime. My mom’s health isn’t good and requires frequent hospitalizations due to her cancer and other conditions, so unfortunately I see this frequently. My mom has private insurance and medicare…not medicaid…I detest that she and the rest of us are supporting such freeloading with our taxes. There are certainly those among us who need Medicaid, but this young lady was one of many who were simply practicing “extended nursing” of our taxes.</p>
<p>I nursed both my kiddos as long as they were interested. S gave it up on his own at age 9 months–totally lost interest & was drinking beverages from a cup. D gave it up on her own at age 18 months, even tho our pediatrician tried to pressure us to have her stop earlier–neither D nor H nor I was interested.</p>
<p>I don’t think that it is that odd to nurse until that age. It isn’t for everyone , and really not much for nourishment in my opinion as much as comfort.
I nursed my three for different lengths of time. From 18 months to 11 months to age three. However, age three was a bed time , comfort ritual only at that point</p>
<p>Everyone parents differently. I wouldn’t have done the family bed thing because I feel that is important to maintain a relationship with your husband and can’t quite see how that could be done if you had to sneak off to another room ;)</p>
<p>No doubt the photo was meant to be provocative…made many people angry and disgusted.
Pretty clever of Time , in order to generate interest in their mag
I am getting a little tired of the media stirring the pot to pit woman against women. Whether it be the " Mommy Wars " or woman in the political arena, enough is enough already !!</p>
<p>Provocative photo, but I don’t really mind… people are making bigger issues than needed, imo.</p>
<p>" Provocative photo, but I don’t really mind… people are making bigger issues than needed, imo. "</p>
<p>I agree ! It is woman caring for her baby in a loving way. It isn’t sexual unless you choose to perceive it that way</p>
<p>this piece echoes my thoughts on this issue;</p>
<p>[Lisa</a> Belkin: It’s Not Porn, People, It’s Food](<a href=“HuffPost - Breaking News, U.S. and World News | HuffPost”>It's Not Porn, People, It's Food | HuffPost Life)</p>
<p>What do you mean, “put the mother in a provocative outfit she normally wouldn’t wear”? Those were her clothes. You make it sound as though this woman was kidnapped and forced to wear clothes she wouldn’t. Anyway, her clothes were perfectly fine - she’s got a good figure, good for her. If it was important to her to only have her picture taken in the way in which she’d normally nurse the boy, she would have said so. She obviously knew that the boy was being put on the chair and they were both looking into the camera. Stop portraying her like a victim.</p>