<p>A few years ago, I felt lucky just to get a card from my kids. Over the years, though, I noticed some subtle changes. Then one year, no one did anything. I didn’t get any acknowledgement! After I made lots of noise about obligations, my son decided it would be a treat if he baked me a cake. I was so pleased I was swooning. But, the kids (or maybe my husband) actually cut into that special Mother’s Day cake without me. My excitement died like a popped balloon; I was completely deflated.</p>
<p>So this year, I’ve become more vocal. None of my kids have much money, so I asked for two hours of mom-directed gardening time. And probably a cake!</p>
<p>Now dads remember: your wife isn’t your mother. Your kids have to do something, not you! Just don’t cut into the cake without singing Happy Mother’s Day".</p>
<p>I’ve always thought it is a shame that Mother’s Day comes before Father’s Day on the yearly calendar. If it were reversed, Dad & kids could use a reminder that Mother’s Day is coming, and pick up some hints from celebration we moms help the kids with for Father’s Day. Without Mom having to tell them to… One year no one said one thing to me all day on Mother’s Day. I finally reminded them around bedtime. Like you said, lima, I felt completely deflated. And unappreciated.</p>
<p>Disagree somewhat that it is not Dad’s responsibility. My kids are eager to do something nice for their dad on Father’s Day, but they definitely needed reminding and support (logisitical and financial) to get it done. I don’t see why dad’s can’t do the same a few times a year (Mother’s Day, mom’s birthday) that we help our kids do for them.</p>
<p>Mom used to get breakfast in bed made by the girls.
My oldest lives out of state, but younger is home for the weekend.
I went to the store to get flowers for my mom, but decided to cut the remaining tulips and bearded irises instead.
Sure do miss her.</p>
<p>EK - big hug to you and others who are missing their moms today. As my mom gets older and I see signs of mild dementia, I find that all I want today is to let her know, in whatever time I have left, what a wonderful mom she is.</p>
<p>I have always insisted that I at least get a home made card on mother’s day and with the help of the computer and last minute work, I usually get one.</p>
<p>This year I asked my husband to try to get the kids in on a gift of taking me to the opera “tosca”. I really don’t think anything will get them to go. I will let you know.</p>
<p>Although I think fathers should teach their kids how to honor their mother, I also believe that we share equal responsibility. From when they are little, we teach them to think of others, to call Grandma on her birthday, to take flowers to their aunt when she’s sick and to get a card and a gift for their Father on Father’s Day. After years of this, I’m sure they can carry the lesson forward on their own and think of mom on Mother’s Day. Although to me, it’s not the gift, it’s the thought. </p>
<p>My oldest is going out of town today, but stopped by here on his way to the airport to wish me Happy Mother’s Day. Didn’t bring a card or a gift, but he thought of me and that’s all I ask. On the other hand, the three boys usually go in together on a gift and his brothers will be here later today so there’s still a chance :)</p>
<p>It’s more miss than hit around here. Youngest is still in exams and one lives fairly close by. I’ll be going there bringing friends and flowers and dessert…that DD made me a grandmother. The rest of the kids live out of state and believe (as I do) that it is a Hallmark holiday. If you can’t think of anything nice during the year…so far I’ve received one phone call.
My own mother is in a nursing home. She has always made a big deal of it so she gets a card and gift and a phone call from me.</p>
<p>We went out for lunch yesterday (less crowds). It was the first mother’s day for my oldest d. so that was very special. H picked up the bill. My youngest d is away at school so she mailed me a hand made card and also sent one to her sister.</p>
<p>As I type I am exiled to my room while my boys are busy downstairs doing SOMETHING. I have not been allowed to eat, but they did let me take a shower and get dressed. I have been up since 5:30, it its now 9:30. HELP!</p>
<p>There have been many years when my kids did nothing and my H has occasionally been heard to say that I’m not his mom so it’s not his responsibility. The whole thing was depressing me so I started to get a little more demanding - part of my “the-kids-have-left-and-now-it’s-all-about-me” campaign. I’ve decided that selflessness is way overrated. But I digresss. </p>
<p>Now my tactic is to make such a huge fuss when they do something nice - major excitement, profuse thanks, telling everybody about it in front of them - in order to reinforce their good behavior. They seem to eat that up and want more. Only one kid is in town this year but she’s heading over this morning and seems to have made a dinner reservation. H is out of town so I wonder who is going to pay!</p>
<p>Moments after I posted that, my H called and said “Happy Mother’s Day…even though you’re not my mother.”</p>
<p>I got phone calls from the college sons last night wishing me a Happy Mother’s Day.</p>
<p>This morning, sitting on the counter was a yummy chocolate doughnut from my husband. It was delicious. The perfect treat to go with my morning tea. The only bad thing is that now I have to jog around the block a few times to burn off the calories.</p>
<p>DS made me breakfast this morning…just having him here was gift enough. Then later I got an Edible Arrangement of fruit from DD and DS…the card was the best part and it’s framed (the fruit is good too). </p>
<p>Just a simple phone call would have been fine with me!!</p>
<p>My mother is no longer alive. My husband will call his mom…I’ve reminded him several times. I will also call my step mom who is simply terrific.</p>
<p>Now that D is not here, she sends an e-card and I get a phone call. When she was still at home, I would always get a homemade card, usually with “coupons” inside that were redeemable for extra chores. There was always a breakfast in bed menu on the back of the card that I got to order off of, complete with coffee and the newspaper. Being a single mom (with no dad) I also got the same treatment on Father’s Day. :)</p>
