<p>I know I’m not a parent, but I’m posting this in the parents forum to get since insight from them.
So basically I’m a senior from Minnesota, and I’m applying ed to Duke. And I will most likely go out of state and actually the midwest, unless I get this caddy scholarship to the UofM. But the thing is in my culture (family is from somalia) the children usually stay at home until they are getting married it in their early 20’s it something like that. But I was raised in american culture, and it may be because I’m a bit stubborn, but I know in not staying in minnesota. That its just the kind if person I am.
So if your child told you that ^ (what I plan on telling my parents) how would you react. </p>
<p>And if it cane down to it, I would be funding my own college cost. Which I’m not opposed to, as long as I’m going somewhere that I’m happy! </p>
<p>As a Minnesota resident, you’ll likely find the public schools in Minnesota, Wisconsin, and the Dakotas to be the most affordable. And Minnesota (Twin Cities) and Wisconsin (Madison) are among the top universities in the US for many subjects. So don’t write them off completely.</p>
<p>Do NOT apply ED unless you have the assets to pay your way to the school you’re applying to. If you aren’t even sure how you will get financial support, do NOT apply to any school ED–EA with no obligation on your part is one thing but ED can affect your ability to apply elsewhere and greatly lessen any financial leverage you have to get the best leverage for a good financial package.</p>
<p>It’s best for you to work with your folks if you want them to help with ANY financial support or even completing forms so you can qualify for anything. Try very hard not to burn bridges as it is very hard to see the future and when you may have to cross back over due to changes in plans.</p>
<p>Some of what you are eligible to apply for in terms of $$$ may depend on whether you are a US citizen or not and whether you are a resident or not. Try to get this clarified, as it can make a big difference on your options–without money, college can quickly get VERY expensive.</p>
<p>Even if you have the money to pay for college yourself – from an inheritance, trust fund, or whatever – consider your long-term career plans.</p>
<p>If you’re planning a career where you will not need any further education beyond a bachelor’s degree or where you will be supported during graduate studies by a teaching or research assistantship (such as a PhD in the sciences), then perhaps Duke or a similar school is worth it, even if you do have to pay for it yourself.</p>
<p>But if you’re considering a career where you might need a professional degree – such as a medical degree, a law degree, or an MBA – the situation is different. Usually, you have to pay to attend those types of schools, just as you do for an undergraduate education. If you’ve already spent all your money on your undergraduate education, you might have to borrow quite a lot for the professional school.</p>
<p>How would you do this? Duke costs over $50,000 a year. Unless you receivevery significant need based financial aid from them or have a HUGE amount of money (over $200,000) in the bank, you would not be able to do so. </p>
<p>Duke is a great school but I’m not sure why you are applying ED.</p>
This is one I’ll have to disagree with. MANY students can’t go to schools in other states because they can’t afford it. This student may very well be one of them. It would be more foolish to go to a top school in another state and pay $200K for an education when the student can get an education nearly as good for free or near free.</p>
<p>Floridadad…I’m assuming you mean this ONLY if the student/family have a way to PAY for that top school in another state.</p>
<p>To the OP…your parents will have to complete a Profile…SOON (if you are applying ED) for Duke. If they are not willing to do so, Duke will not award you ANY institutional need based aid at all.</p>
<p>I would want my child to discuss with me his/her reasons for wanting to go to an out of state school, not just “tell me.”</p>
<p>But OP, like everyone else, I want to know how you plan on funding your education on your own. Do you have $250,000 in your own name that you can spend on college. If your parents are funding your education and they won’t pay for you to go out of state, you may not have many options. Duke does have merit scholarships, but they are very, very rare and very competitive.</p>
I’m afraid your question is directed at the wrong audience since there are likely few, if any, parents here on CC who have immigrated to this country and have gone through this. Since you’re referring to a cultural issue it’d probably take someone of that same cultural background to give you the perspective you need.</p>
<p>However, your parents made an effort to emigrate to the USA (I assume) and therefore into another culture and raised you in this culture so IMO it’d be unreaonable of them to expect you to behave the same as if you were raised in the environment they were used to in Somalia. </p>
<p>If you haven’t already done so you need to have a frank, serious, calm, and mature discussion with them on the topic. Maybe they’ll surprise you and be more open to this than you think.</p>
<p>Nasali,
i understand that you want to go where you want to go…but the money issue has to be addressed…unless you personally really and truly have full control of enough money of your own. Wishful thinking won’t produce the money you need when you need it, and thinking that you can present your parents with a fait accompli and they will cough up the money could backfire on you.</p>
<p>Every spring there are a lot of thread here on CC written by students who have gotten in to their “dream” college, don’t have the money to go to it, and have not applied to a school they would still be happy at even if it isn’t the dream school, but that they could afford.</p>
<p>Well unfortunately your plan to go out of state DOES involve money…and it may involve money that is not yours…it may need to involve money your parents will be asked to contribute to your college education.</p>
<p>I didn’t mind my S going OOS, but the Mrs. did, oh boy did she. She is an immigrant (legal) and culturally things are different as was Jr.'s upbringing. I only wish he would have tackled the fiscal side of things as you have promised to. If he’d have done that I would have let him go to Somalia!</p>
<p>OP, please understand that you cannot borrow what it costs to attend Duke, et al, without a cosigner who will be putting themselves on the hook for the amount you borrow if you default. Use a loan calculator and figure out how much you’d have to repay every month on a $100,000 loan. It’s not pretty.</p>
<p>Heck, I won’t cosign those kinds of loans for my own kids.</p>
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