<p>Last night at a zoning hearing my next-door neighbors fought us over a zoning variance. The hearing was bitter and the neighbors lost (they had applied for a variance to come closer to our house).</p>
<p>Early this morning they blasted their car alarm for about 5 minutes. Our bedrooms are right next to their driveway, they know my husband has an odd schedule and needs his sleep. Tonight they were running the car alarm from a different car on and off for about 5 minutes at a time. </p>
<p>I brought cookies over to them earlier tonight, and they slammed the door in my face.</p>
<p>So I guess I need to start video recording the car alarm business, and if they keep it up, bring it to the police?</p>
<p>These people are basically bullies. What is the best way to handle this? I tried to make peace. The husband is actually illiterate, a construction worker, has a fiery temper and doesn’t speak English very well. The wife has a semi-professional job, is very concerned with appearances and social standing. </p>
<p>If this continues, should I warn them before I go to the police? Any advice would be appreciated.</p>
<p>I don’t suggest warning them because they may be nuts enough to physically attack you. Document what they are doing, find out about what your local noise ordinance regulations are, and call police when your neighbors violate it.</p>
<p>You should consider talking to the police because that establishes a history if this goes on or gets worse. Depending on where you live, you might simply be able to talk to a desk person or a community relations officer rather than have a car come to your house. If you express your concern, then depending on how busy they are in your town, the police will listen to you.</p>
<p>But then again, when some neighbors let a couple of kids live in their place for a summer and the kids started yelling obscenities out the windows, the officer who came by stood under their open window and in a very loud voice said that maybe we should simply punch them out next time. They never made another loud noise.</p>
<p>Yes, if they keep it up tomorrow, I think I will call a desk person at the Police Dept.</p>
<p>I didn’t want to escalate things by getting the police involved. I’m afraid that if one thing is stopped they’ll just find something else to do to hurt us.</p>
<p>Please call your non-emergencey police line and talk to someone before attempting anything (and definitely have no contact with the neighbors - they sound like they are nuts). Please be aware that video surveillance is OK as long as you are not filming inside their house, but recording of sound may be against the law (have you ever noticed that security cameras never record sound?) What is not against the law, as we were told by our local cops, is when, for instance, your H films you with the sound blasting in the background.</p>
<p>I think I’d wait a few more days before doing anything. Let them cool off, even if this means a couple of days of nuisance. They may stop their boorish behavior on their own once they feel they’ve let off enough steam. Do you have other neighbors besides those? They might become involved, too.</p>
<p>^ I totally agree. Let them burn off some bad feelings and cool down…I doubt they can keep it up nor want to. It’s a lot of energy on their part too I imagine. I think responding or escalating it will just drag it out or turn it into something else, more covert, maybe more nasty.</p>
<p>Hi again! Thought I’d give an update. Neighbors did not run their car alarm this morning, but did a lot of purposeful noisemaking. For example the 8 year old son took a metal baseball bat and banged it against the driveway pavement for a minute or two, laughing. </p>
<p>Maybe this is improvement over a car alarm? It is a quieter, but it is sad to see them raise their children this way.</p>
<p>Later in the morning I called the police desk. The officer wanted to send a car out and file a complaint. He said to call every time they do it. I am glad they are concerned and responsive, but we decided to wait a few days to see if things cool down. I did find out from the officer that it is OK to tape them with video and audio.</p>
<p>So that is where it stands. Our plan is to just ignore them for a few days, and see if it decreases. We’ll be trying to capture their behavior on video. </p>
<p>Thanks for listening! You can imagine this has been stressful, and it is nice to hear some perspective from sane people! I wish one of you would move next door to me!</p>
<p>I bet the other neighbors would appreciate cookies – and when you take them, just ask casually “gosh, I wonder if the Beavis family’s car alarm is broken? Did you hear it the other day?” My hunch is, you are not the only one who was disturbed by this. Depending on their answer, you could then say “maybe we should give the police a call if it happens again, what if it was an emergency”.</p>
<p>In some areas, the police don’t do anything if it’s just one neighbor who calls. I personally feel it might be dangerous to engage them all by yourselves. Can you put up a fence just at the property line to make sure they don’t take the extra footage they want?</p>
<p>Probably DH will need some earplugs. This might take awhile.</p>
<p>VeryHappy, I’ve been lurking for about 6 to 9 months. I have one high school sophomore and one 4th grader.</p>
<p>AnnuduhMom, We will probably put up a fence for privacy and sanity reasons! They can’t build closer to us though, because they were not granted the variance. Earplugs may be required, as you said.</p>
<p>If they keep up the alarm nonsense, other neighbors might beat you to the police complaint. </p>
<p>I don’t think you should have brought cookies to them, and I do not think you should attempt any type of reconciliation. I believe I can assume that your homes are not too far apart to begin with, because if you each lived on a couple of acres the zoning thing would not be an issue. In that type of situation, trying to expand a home closer to a neighbor’s in a way which requires a variance is thoughtless. They should have discussed the matter in advance with you, and politely accepted your wishes if you chose not to agree to it. A hearing with neighbor against neighbor? That’s the worst.</p>
<p>Ugh, sorry to hear about your situation commasplice…we have friends who battle the same thing with their neighbors in a very close space…the battle began over a similar situation , though our friends are operating a B&B…the jerks next door do everything they can in terms of ****ing them off, all by staying within the town’s noise ordinance…this basically breaks down to mounting loadspeakers on their fence that are in direct earshot of their guests,blast seriously annoying music between the noise ordinace legal hours…this means that their guests will be awakened by 8am and if they are in their rooms, will be subjected until 9pm…not exactly good for business.
Very frustrating situation…I cannot fathom the bitterness and all out hatred it must take to put forth such an effort to destroy one’s neighbor…
I would be very careful not to irritate these people any more than necessary because they sound like the same idiots our friends deal with…if I had the free time these people had to devote to creating misery, I personally would channel it into doing good, but sadly, the worls is filled with such terrible people.
I wish you a lot of luck</p>
<p>Spideygirl, I agree in hindsight that I shouldn’t have brought cookies to them. It probably just empowered them. Oh well, at least I know I tried to be decent.</p>
<p>NJres, Yes it is awful. We really like our neighborhood other than these people, though.</p>
<p>lje62, Hi. Our houses are about 20 feet apart. Our bedroom sits right near their driveway… yuck. I feel for your friends. Yes- what a waste of energy and life. I just hate they WE have to try to not irritate THEM because then they will do nasty illegal things. But that is where we are at right now. It is bullying, adult style.</p>
<p>As an archictect I always advise my clients to talk to their neighbors before we go to zoning. I haven’t lost a case yet. I’m sorry you are going through this. I think you are doing the right thing to see if they’ll calm down on their own, but if they don’t I wouldn’t hesitate to call the police in.</p>
<p>commasplice, welcome to CC! I really hope that your crazy neighbors will stop their attacks (after all, they also have to wake up early to create the noise, and that might wear them down eventually). I agree with the other posters - give it a few more days and see where it goes. Bullies like your neighbors usually go away if their actions are ignored. But if this escalates to physical damage to your property - call the police immediately.</p>