I wouldn’t offer to pay back. I’d pretend I never heard them and get ready to go back in the fall. And I’d hustle to find a way to not be home next summer.
What they were talking about has been eating me on the inside. What would potentially happen if I told them I heard?
You were eavesdropping. Let it go. When you get back to Purdue, go to the counseling center there and discuss this with a counsellor there.
I don’t hear you saying that your parents have told you that they will not fund sending you back to Purdue. Unless that happens…pack your stuff, go back, and do a good job.
Like others have said, parents sometimes vent without really meaning it. I would guess they don’t realize how hard it is to get a 3.5 at Purdue in CS. Ignore it, go back to Purdue and continue to do well. Maybe work to get an internship out my way, Microsoft or Amazon, next summer, away from home.
If you are getting a little soft around the middle, now would be a great time to get off the carbs and on some sort of exercise regimen. Life is a lot more fun as a fit person.
Well I don’t think you are worthless:). You weight seem utterly normal at 5’11", and boys your age are generally always eating! Your grades seem quite good! And lots of internships require a lot of admin stuff. You can’t help that!
Go back to school and start looking for your own job next summer w/o dad’s help. Forget what you heard.
I have threatened my kids that they wouldn’t be able to go back to their private school when they were younger, but I never really meant it. It didn’t take my older kid long to figure it out.
3.5 GPA at Purdue for CS is very respectable. You should be proud of yourself.
I feel like since I couldn’t do the 6 week calc course my dad thinks I’m worthless
Stop it. You are projecting other issues onto the conversation you managed to eavesdrop and hear which was between your parents.
Please…pack up, go back to Purdue. And when you get there go get some counseling to help you get over this issue.
ETA…unless I’m reading your past posts wrong…Purdue is your THIRD college. You went to OSU, then DePaul (where you lived in an off campus apartment with your dad??), and now Purdue.
In addition, you never sounded happy about any school you attended. This is not news.
I strongly suggest you get some counseling…as soon as you get back to Purdue. You can’t seem to see the bright side of any cloud. Time to figure out why.
Now hold up I am very happy at Purdue. I went to DePaul for one quarter sept-nov because I had no other place to go. My parents made me go there. When I was at Depaul I also commuted thank you very much. I won’t go about people saying I am not happy with where I am at. My parents have been overbearing for a good portion of my life. I don’t think you you realize how frustrating It is to have to say to my friends or study partners I can’t because my parents don’t approve. Thumper1 I would watch what you say because you seem to be twisting the facts. I do want to do counseling but because I want to find a way to vent my problems. Sometimes I wish my parents would be open to family counseling also so they can get a second opinion on their behavior but they are too stubborn. My mom just told me my dad is upset because he thought I was acting lazy in calc 3. The thing is I don’t think he realizes I had way too much on my plate with working a internship, commute times, and being able to wake up early enough to make it to class.
I’m not twisting the facts. You said you hated Purdue…and you were unhappy at OSU, and you were unhappy commuting to DePaul. You were the one who wrote you lived in an off campus apartment while attending DePaul.
You wrote this on Feb 2
But let’s let that all go.
Get yourself back to college. Your parents haven’t told you that they aren’t paying for you to go back…right? Your GPA at Purdue is better than at OSU…plus they are paying instate vs out of state costs.
Unless they have told you they are not paying to send you back to college…get your stuff packed…and head back to Purdue. Get yourself some counseling.
And as others have noted…try to find an internship at a place other than your hometown for next summer.
Seems pretty obvious who is worthless in the house, and there are two of them. But as others said, they pay the bills, let them have their complainerfests…
Yes, it was unfortunate you heard it, but no, it wasn’t okay for them to say that.
I know people who are getting divorced and will not get counseling no matter what. You cannot force your parents into counseling, but you can go to counseling to talk about how their behavior makes you feel, and how YOU can not fall into that kind of behavior.
If you had too much on your plate, something has to give.
And yes, some of us know what it is like to be refused to be allowed to go out or punished over stupid things. My parents told me not to report that my brother broke my shoulder “or else”.
I think you are getting on your way to becoming an adult, and you need to take what they said to a counselor, not to them, and ignore haters.
It’s sad the haters happen to be your own parents, but that is life sometimes. And sad thing is, your story isn’t the worst on CC 
As stated by @Ynotgo , MV Calc. is too hard to take in the summer along with a full time internship. Think of it as a learning experience, and go back to Purdue. With your GPA , you should be able to get a decent internship away from your hometown next summer. Purdue is a tough school and so you should be very proud of yourself for having the GPA that you do =D> . While we all wish your parents could agree about that, it will not happen. And forget getting them into family counseling - tried that with my Indian parents 30 years ago when I was a college student -and it was a nonstarter. It’s a culturally embedded thing (even among educated folks) which I still have trouble understanding. But you can go to the college counseling center and get help to sort this out.
It is really hard to separate from Indian parents. I live in an Indian family - I understand the dynamics. But at some point, your life is your life. Right now, as far as you are supposed to know, you are headed back to Purdue. Start packing, start talking about it, start showing them your excitement about the classes you are taking this semester. When you get to school, do what excites you. Eventually you will graduate, get a job, etc. The problem I see is more long term. If you don’t start being more independent you will have them dictating your job, your marriage, your family. Show them you are capable of making good, solid decisions. As for the food…if it is not eating too much it is eating too little. In Indian families it seems there is no middle ground on food issues. Let it go.
Ignore the little things that bother you and focus on the big goal. Graduate from Purdue. You will finds out in life there are always noises, whether they are from your parents, no disrespect to your parents, or noise from coworkers, roommates, or whatever, they are just noises. You don’t focus on noises, that doesn’t mean they are not there.
You have gotten good advice here. Learn ways to relax. Go for a walk, do some yoga, or something fun and relaxing.
You will feel healthy and less toxic which will allow to you better focus on your goals and keep you away from negative thoughts and distractions. Focus your mind on getting back to school for the Fall semester and prepare for it. Once you are in school do well and find activities that are enjoyable and make the most of your time at school.
One reason not to bring it up is that your dad may feel backed into a corner and like he has to follow through on what he said if you tell him you heard it. You don’t want to force that issue.
I once heard my dad say something VERY uncomplimentary about me when I was about your age. I never confronted him and he doesn’t know I heard it. It was over 30 years ago, and frankly it contributes to the fact that I live hundreds of miles from my parents. I am a dutiful child, but I know what he really thinks… But bringing it to their attention that you overheard just isn’t going to go well.
I am a straightshooter so here goes. Why do you care what your parents think at this point in your life? Man up and get some independence. Go back to college, let them pay for it and do whatever. If you are depressed get some counseling. Frankly, your parents are probably frustrated spending a ton of money and wondering if it is a good investment. Virtually every parent has that thought - some wonder about it for only for a moment, others question it the entire four years, and yes, some say it out loud. Kids these days - and I suppose some of it is cultural - are too worried about pleasing mom and dad for too long. That should dissipate in your teens. Yes we hope they are proud of us, but they aren’t going to be proud 24 hours a day, that is impossible because people aren’t perfect. It is your life - when you are 80, what do you want to have accomplished when looking back? What your parents wanted for you or what you want for yourself? It is your life dude. I get they are your parents, but frankly, they are just two people with an opinion that you can choose to disregard. btw, a 3.5 if a fabulous college gpa.
You said your parents are very happy with your 3.5 GPA at Purdue. You should be happy with that.
I think your parents are probably concerned about your goal and your future progress in college. Did you volunteer to take Multivariable Caculus class or did your parents suggest you to take it? If you decided to take it in order to be ahead in your college plan then you should have received credit for it although the class was hard and you were busy with your intership. If you set the goal then you should aim to achieve it. Probably that’s what your parents have in their mind. (I took a summer class in assembly language but I dropped it too because I was afraid I could not get at least a B, the minimum grade to be admitted to CS major. My parents did not know anything about it though.).
Finish college with a 3.5 GPA.
Spend next summer interning somewhere far from home.
Once you’re done with college, move far, far away from your parents. When they berate you for moving far away, THEN tell them that you heard all of the mean things that they said about you.
I’d start exercising a few times a week; your height/weight aren’t out of line but it’s good to get into good habits, since once you’re working and aging, weight will creep up on you and it’s harder to get in the groove of a fit lifestyle once you’re older.
Good idea about exercising. It’s not all about loosing weight, it also about stress release and fun also. Pick something you like to do and enjoy. I hope once you become succesful, as in have a good paying job, you won’t have to feel that you have to hold grudge. I’m no saint, but holding grudge hurts you more than it hurts your dad. Lifelong advice in general.