<p>I’m referring to eye contact in terms of just walking and minding one’s own business with a purpose in mind - having to get somewhere, not trying to scope someone out.</p>
<p>I get those same calls from my kids, too - always getting in a subway, or a dorm or an apt. or an elevator, etc.</p>
<p>Longtime resident of Manhattan here . . . one thing that I learned early and heard repeated often was that it is incredibly important to keep your wits about you in NYC (and I think it’s good advice when travelling anywhere unfamiliar, as well as in any big city no matter how familiar). Be aware of your surroundings is an oft repeated phrase in every safety program handbook. Part of that awareness, I was always taught, is not to listen to an iPod or talk on a cell phone while walking around the City (okay, so when I was first learning these things I was told not to listen to a Sony Walkman instead of an iPod, but you get the picture). As one example, the New York Road Runners Club recommends to its members (some 50,000 or so of them) that they not listen to music while running (even though Central Park is actually the safest precinct in NYC – not the area around NYU) so that they can stay aware of their surroundings and hear people approach as they run. In fact, for this reason (and other safety-related reasons) headphones are not allowed during any NYRRC events, including the NYC marathon.</p>
<p>Now, I don’t know that any of these suggestions would have prevented your son from falling victim to the shoving and allegations of these scam artists, but maybe he might have appeared a tougher mark if he was walking with purpose along 14th Street? It’s impossible to say for sure. Thankfully, your son wasn’t injured and merely lost some money along the way. It might be money well spent if he is more aware and guarded in the future so that he never falls victim to crimes against him again.</p>
<p>NYUMom - Indeed, “Minding one’s own business” is a key ingredient to staying safe in urban areas. </p>
<p>That means that when a stranger approaches you with a “problem” or a question or tries to sell you something or solicit you for something you should extricate yourself from that situation immediately and firmly. It’s sad, but that’s the way it is. The more trivial or creative the approach or problem the more dangerous it can be. </p>
<p>I may sound paranoid, but I’m just repeating what the so-called experts say.</p>
<p>unfortunately, SueinPhilly’s S was the victim of a street scam.The “powder” was put on the street,to see who would walk through it. Obviously he did, probably while chatting on the cell. Then he (and probably others) were followed, and confronted. When he left his new location with the conmen and returned to the original location and gave them some cash, they knew they had a patsy (sorry Sue, but thats what he became at that moment).Then they decided to take it further and see what would happen then. Hes lucky they were probably harmless, otherwise they wouldnt have been satisfied with an additional $20.
By the way, love CGM’s idea about an alert system of some kind on ATM’s.
Sorry for the way the cops treated your S,Sue.As a native NY’er with a S in his late teens, and having cops for neighbors and even as relatives, I would have told S not to bother reporting the incident.I know how kids that age, especially boys are treated.</p>
<p>citygirlsmom wrote: they should have a thing at the atm, where you can somehow alert the machine if you are being forced to use it…some kind of code…like if you add an astrix or an extra # or 999 at the end of the password…something that can be done quickly</p>
<p>or just if you put the card in and do 9999 or such…and then say, oh I was nervouse, let me do it again, but it would send an alarm and only allow so much $ to be released and maybe eat the card</p>
<p>What a BRILLIANT idea. I wonder why those in a position of doing something (“They”) haven’t come up with this.</p>
<p>I was so troubled by SueInPhillie’s son’s experience that I emailed MY S who is 24 and lives in NYC, near Columbia U, for his perspective. He moved to NYC 2 years ago following college graduation, and had to get streetsmart.</p>
<p>He wrote that the bad idea was following the robber back to the supposed “bag of cocaine” and sent linkes to say this same trick got pulled near the Columbia campus in the spring, and previously:</p>
<p><a href=“http://gothamist.com/2006/04/27/post_69.php[/url]”>http://gothamist.com/2006/04/27/post_69.php</a>
<a href=“http://www.columbiaspectator.com/node/11436[/url]”>http://www.columbiaspectator.com/node/11436</a></p>
<p>He regretted that the young student had been “gullible and/or compliant” (his words), Then he added: </p>
<p>“Doesn’t excuse the police though.”</p>
<p>My parental voice again: I agree with Soozie Vt in post 37 that if he wasn’t street-smart HE WAS STILL THE VICTIM. It’s so easy in a safe space to say someone else wasn’t quick on their feet. When a person is cornered, we should all be grateful they used their best available survival instincts and didn’t get HURT.</p>
<p>Also agree that he was a victim, and deserved to be treated respectfully by the cops. This is a familiar street hussle in NYC, where I’ve lived and worked for more years than I want to admit. I’ve never heard it done with cocaine, but maybe the idea is that the con men think the victim won’t involve the cops. I would update the NYU security on this and let them know to warn students of the scam.</p>
<p>The fact that these con games are apparently prevalent in NYC is another reason why the police dropped the ball here and didn’t even consider that this wasn’t a false report or a drug deal gone bad but that ONE possibility (and in fact, the truth) was one of these con games.</p>
<p>I’m so sorry to hear about this. The savvy of these criminals overwhelm me. And the action of the police…unless it happens right under their nose forget about any help. Take care and be careful.</p>
<p>Sorry to hear this. What will they think of next? </p>
<p>I hope people from Iowa (to use it again) reading this who’ve never been to the city don’t think this is representative of only NYC. It can happen anywhere. I feel safer in NYC than I do in Philly, or even Atlantic City (there last night watching the Sands implode…a bit shady). Safety in numbers, there’s so much street traffic in NY compared to other cities.</p>
<p>My son age 24 lived last year near that area, 18th and First in Stuyvesant/Cooper. The area’s super busy with thousands of gullible young people. They’re no match for people who do tricks like this…eventually they’ll land a bite. I doubt your son would have been singled out if he wasn’t on the cell phone. Then again it’s pretty brazen on the perpetrators’ part…wouldn’t they think whoever your S was talking to (grandparents?) could immediately call police for that area? I agree it seems every other person on the streets of NY, of any age, is talking on a phone. Your son will be better off for this, it’s reality in a big city, but I feel for him and how shaken up he must have been.</p>
<p>There are countless crime reports posted on the wall outside of one of the lobby elevators in one of the NYU dorms, so this probably isn’t the only incident of this nature that has occurred. This was the first time that I had actually seen them posted, and I didn’t get a chance to read any of them - unfortunately, we were in a hurry, so I barely had time to take a quick glance. They used to post the crime reports somewhere on the NYU website - it migh have been listed under the WSN (newspaper) heading and then by searching “crime reports”, and we used to be able to actually read them. I guess now they’re posting them to make more students aware of what’s going on in the NYU buildings/campus. They may, in fact, be posting in all of the dorms, but I don’t know for sure.</p>
<p>Regardless of what the “con” was, Sue’s S was threatened with the presence of a weapon and “escorted” elsewhere. That’s kidnapping! If you are told there’s a gun on you, and one false move etc. I would bet that’s what most people would focus on, and not whether or not the scam was a believable one. </p>
<p>I agree that it’s ridiculous that the police didn’t consider the scam aspect of this as a plausible an explanation, although this one seemed to take it a lot farther than the others- threatening with a weapon, being forced to accompany to ATM etc. One thing is clear though - the police made a big thing of the fact that they weren’t called immediately, and that Sue’s S spoke to other family members first. I can absolutely see many kids doing the same - calling home first , asking what to do. I don’t know - but maybe part of the issue here was that the police WERE taking this very seriously (because of the seriousness of the allegations - it was an alleged kidnapping, basically) and thus were skeptical as to why it took Sue’s S so long to call police. </p>
<p>Most importantly, I’m glad your S is OK, Sue, and that in view of the threats against him he did everything he had to do to stay safe.</p>
<p>I didn’t see mention of a weapon; that would ratchet the crime up a notch. Even the fact that his arm was grabbed though, suggests that there was some serious coercion going on – which would have been hard to extricate himself from – he did the right thing cooperating and is lucky nothing worse happened. These scams seem common in NY – my kid was approached in a similar kind of scam involving the accusation that he broke the guy’s sunglasses, and a demand for money. The cops know this and were wrong to react so unsympathetically and suspiciously – seems that they didn’t want to be bothered and just bullied your son to avoid having to follow up. As to not calling the cops immediately – I think that in a similar situation, I would first call my husband – so I totally understand why your son called family first. So should the cops. Mean streets. NY…best to stay alert at all times, especially at night.</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>From Post # 20.</p>
<p>
What??? How can anyone say the cops didn’t want to be bothered? Sue stated that they accompanied her son to the scene, tested the powder, viewed the ATM tape, spoke with relatives he was in contact with. That sure sounds like a lot of work for cops who “didn’t want to be bothered.” It would be much easier on their parit if they had simply said, “Tough luck, kid. That’s a common street con. Don’t fall for it again.” </p>
<p>Something about the story or the son’s actions aroused their suspicions. Look at the story from the point of view of a cop, rather than a mom who knows her son & is certain he was hustled, not involved in a drug deal. It sounded wacky to me, and I kind of cringed when reading it, wondering how he was likely viewed when retelling it. The cops did a lot of legwork to ascertain he was a victim & not a drug buyer. If not being believed is enough cause for a citizen to file a complaint, the NYPD would be shut down due to paperwork & internal investigations. Obviously the cops took action.</p>
<p>Sue–I am sorry for what happened to your son. </p>
<p>Many years ago there was an Oprah show about what to do in situations.</p>
<h1>1 rule–do not leave with the “perp” to go to another location. If they are going to hurt you, they will have to do it on the spot.</h1>
<h1>2 rule–Don’t worry about being polite–if someone stops to talk to you, just keep walking. This is hard to do, but I have told my girls this. If someone asks for the time, directions or money, look at them and say "I’m sorry, I don’t know/have any money. As they get older, they can learn who to trust and who not to trust.</h1>
<p>Sorry, but if the cops had really been interested, they would have done a lot more to find those guys – the crime, which could have been kidnapping for armed robbery, possession of illegal drugs, etc., could be viewed as serious enough to investigate – but they can’t be bothered since the kid was not hurt and not much money was lost. The fact that the cops showed up and interviewed him was not enough to show that they were serious about it once they heard his story. There were bigger fish to fry. What seems worst to me about this is that they threatened her son that they would charge him with a crime if he didn’t just go away. That is worse than saying “tough luck kid.” I don’t think there was anything particularly suspicious about the boys behavior.</p>
<p>Why would he even GO to the police had he not been a victim? I hate it when victims are blamed–what could he have gained by going to the police? The kid was in shock–as most of us would be in this situation. I think Sue taught him well.</p>
<p>On this thread I think people who are accustomed to living around the complexities of life in NYC are of two minds. Some say the police didn’t represent them well and the family should file a complaint. Others say the police were justified, did respectable legwork because they had reason to unravel it and make sure the kid wasn’t a drug buyer. (I keep asking myself HOW would his story lead a cop to connect dots and think “drug buyer”-- but maybe that just shows how un-city I really am.)</p>