<p>@jsmill1, I skimmed through some of your other posts, and you make reference to being a college administrator. I’m wondering if your wife won’t display the sticker of a school that she sees as “less than” because it conflicts with her image of being the wife of a college administrator?</p>
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<p>From another thread. He later described this as a “joke” and “hyperbole,” but…I don’t think a college finance professional/administrator would say this to impressionable high school kids. Nor is it true that Harvard just hands out money when parents refuse to pay.</p>
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<p>Exactly. It very likely DOES bother the son, but what is he going to say? Does he really want to complain and then open himself to a rude comment from his mom saying that if he had gone to an elite school, his sticker would be honored?</p>
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<p>I think the comments made have been entirely justified. The woman thinks it’s more important to appear that she’s the mom of ONLY ivy students, than to consider the feelings of her 3rd child. </p>
<p>I would appeal to my spouse in terms of the future. Adult children take these hurts with them, and when their future spouses learn of them, the spouses sometimes become the ones who issue the paybacks…and those paybacks may be ones that are far more costly than pride about elite schools. </p>
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My Ohio State grad husband not only has his OSU sticker on his car, but a UMich sticker for his sons that he’s proud of and a sticker for the directional university that third son went to that he’s equally proud of. There’s a man to keep. </p>
<p>When our kids got into their schools, we got the “xxx mom” and “xxx dad” t shirts for us (parents). Now, no one ever really sees them - they’re worn usually to sleep in, or maybe work out in. But can you imagine if I’d shown pride and excitement in being “xxx mom” for one kid and not the other? Yuck. </p>
<p>Five pages in, and we’re STILL waiting to hear what it is exactly the wife objects to. A whole lot of speculation going on here, but not a whole lot of detail to make a judgment by. </p>
<p>Aside from being labeled “competitive,” what EXACTLY does she say, @JSMILL1, when you confront her?</p>
<p>I’m not accusing the OP of making up the story, but let’s just say I find his summary of the situation less than complete. I’d really like to hear the wife’s side of the story about why she doesn’t display the third sticker.</p>
<p>And this whole discussion brings up the question as to why anyone displays a school bumper sticker, etc., on their car. Is it a source of pride, an advertisement for a school that maybe could use some extra promotion, a freebie that should never be wasted? </p>
<p>I wonder what would happen if the OP and his son stickered her car - would she leave it there or break a nail furiously trying to peel it off before her next drive to impress car ride?</p>
<p>Although I disagree with not putting son # 3 bumper sticker on the car, if the OP has made his case, and mom still won’t do it, then she has made her choice. Son #3 may be hurt at the moment, but he is going to have to cope with being the one of the siblings at the state school from now on- holidays, family events. If these events are unbearable, he may decide to keep his distance, or he may realize that this has nothing to do with him and not take it personally. </p>
<p>Dad may not be able to change mom’s point of view, but he can influence how son #3 copes, by showing his unconditional love and not making a big deal over the different schools. It is possible that son#3 will be proud of all his kids one day, no matter where they go to college. </p>
<p>The best solution is to remove ALL the stickers from her car. Problem solved.</p>
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And don’t forget the most practical reason, @LucieTheLakie - they help you tell your car from all the other silver Hondas in the parking lot.</p>
<p>I’ve met my share of parents with issues over the years, but even they displayed either all the school stickers or none. Seems like there’s such an easy way not to make this an issue. Hope the OP returns to clarify.</p>
<p>After reading these posts I picked up a window sticker for S’s Southern state flagship. D’s private school sent two stickers. D asked me to put one on my car so I did. It never occurred to me that S (who has already graduated) might feel slighted. Of course, different situation than OP’s wife who has been asked and refuses to display the sticker. S never got me a sticker nor asked that I get one to put on my car. </p>
<p>I believe the post is real. OP’s wife sounds like an uber competitive Upper East Side socialite. I’ve known a few of that ilk - they view their children’s accomplishments as their personal trophies. I guess she thinks a Southern state school isn’t much of a trophy. Very sad. I really feel for the kid. </p>
<p>We only need one sticker for the entire family - On, Wisconsin!</p>
<p>We only need one sticker too, both kids went to the same school.</p>
<p>Husband and I never had had a bumper sticker. One kid really wanted his school on the family car, so we relented. Another said, in disbelief, “I don’t think they really do that at my school” and I answered, “it’s all or nothing so just get with the program” When they graduated, the first one wanted the grad school and I said, “nope - we don’t do that for grad schools” Then - sadly - all the stickers came off at the car wash.</p>
<p>Ha, @alh! By the time I graduated from college, I couldn’t afford a car to place a bumper sticker on! </p>
<p>When visiting a small LAC in the Midwest with my son, I picked up a bumper sticker for a parent back home who’d lost hers in the car wash … AFTER my son informed me he wasn’t going there. Great little school that could use all the advertising it can get here on the East Coast. </p>
<p>My own alma mater? Not so much. They’ve got billionaires coming out the wazoo and surely don’t need my help wooing other students.</p>
<p>@momtocollegekids: OP makes reference to a 13 year old. </p>
<p><a href=“What colleges ask what you have read in high school? - Applying to College - College Confidential Forums”>What colleges ask what you have read in high school? - Applying to College - College Confidential Forums;
<p>Calling BS</p>
<p>qialah: good find. Supports my post #58.</p>
<p>While we only need one sticker for the kids, my hubby and me, we don’t have one. It isn’t a ‘thing’ here.</p>
<p>The easiest solution is for the dad to take the nice car, and get his wife a used Yugo.</p>