<p>It isn’t that I don’t “get” people who are shocked by the thought of college students doing something that those in their 50s-60s might consider avant guard
But I do raise an eyebrow at those who are shocked that college students might consider doing something that their parents might consider a little too wild and crazy</p>
<p>We cross-posted, hereshoping. I don’t think we’re that far apart. We just want what’s best for our dear children.</p>
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<p>I dunno, what do people usually do at parties? What is it naive to think they’re not doing, which the word “party” implies to you? I’m really trying to figure this out. In other words, does “party” imply “orgy” to you, or if not, what do you think occurs at clothed parties?</p>
<p>I agree, bethievt. One thing is for sure, anyone taking the time to post here cares about their kids and wants what’s best for them!</p>
<p>ek: I fear kids keep “pushing the envelope” on what their parents might find wild or crazy. I think some kids today are just starved for limits, even at the ages of 18-20. I think kids of that age do better with SOME limits. That’s just my personal opinion.</p>
<p>No, in today’s parlance, “party” implies drinking to me, which in turn sadly implies that sexual activity may be taking place, since all studies point to alcohol as a major factor in risky sex. </p>
<p>Not saying all kids who “party” drink, but it is probably likely in more cases than not.</p>
<p>Nothing implies an “orgy” to me. I did not write the “right-wing” college guide, and have not read it.</p>
<p>garland</p>
<p>My S hopes to revive salons at whatever college he attends, probably clothing optional or not. i think it’s nice. It’s all about ideas and he doesn’t seem that obsessed about the details. It’s really ok with me if someone else finds that objectionable, as long as he/she isn’t trying to control my kid.</p>
<p>that sounds like a nice idea, bethie. What sort of schools is he looking at?</p>
<p>Grinnell and Reed are 2. There are so many great options for schools. It’s one of the really good things about the USA, IMO.</p>
<p>Those are fabulous schools. My S was interested in Reed for a while, but ultimately decided he was not an LAC type. I bet they’d be good salon starting up schools ,too.</p>
<p>Well, I must be a little more prudish than most, but the thought of naked parties makes me uncomfortable. Of course, though I never streaked in HS, that was the cool thing to do back then. I’m also uncomfortable with the thought that my kids might drink, or do other things that I think they shouldn’t. I don’t think I’d base the whole college choice on this one issue, but I do know that some schools have a different culture than others. Unfortunately, I don’t know of any that would be as restrictive as I’d like!!! But I think that’s why they should go AWAY to college. I really don’t want to know everything they are up to. I hope that we’ve conveyed our values and religious beliefs, but I’m not naive enough to think that nothing ever happens.</p>
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<p>But it’s not a person I’m trying to “get” – it’s just an idea. Obviously communicating a whole worldview is impossible. This kind of opinion shouldn’t be so tough. If you said, “I believe that these parties are a bad thing because they lead to X, Y, and Z consequences for the participants,” I might disagree, but if it’s stated well, we can get it.</p>
<p>My own experience is that when everyone’s naked, the guys spend 95% of their mental energy on what I will delicately call self-control. Guys who doubt their ability to maintain complete “composure” don’t attend, or don’t undress. (Of course, this isn’t a challenge when they’re running around outside in the snow at midnight in January in New England during Primal Scream.) Granted, I went to a famously tame college, so maybe at raging party schools they’re having unprotected drunken sex on the dance floor.</p>
<p>Edited to add: sjmom, my mom doesn’t want to hear about this kind of thing either, but I know that ultimately she trusted both me and my friends to make good decisions about safety, and I believe we did.</p>
<p>To respond to the tangent about alcohol and risky sex…people don’t just behave badly because they drink, they drink because they think it gives them a license to behave badly without accountability. People (especially girls IMHO) WANT to have risky sex, and they deliberately drink beforehand so that the next day they can tell themselves, “Oh, I don’t know what got into me, I’m a good girl, I was just drunk!” Again in my experience, people who are truly responsible about sex, and WANT to be responsible about sex, stay responsible when they’re drinking. The big problem is the view that alcohol provides some kind of excuse.</p>
<p>I just want to know who Levon Helm is.</p>
<p>Hanna: I couldn’t say what you wanted me to: “I believe these parties are a bad thing because they lead to x,y,z consequences for the participants” because I don’t know what they lead to, as does no one else who has contributed to this thread, apparently. People have differing ideas as to what they might (or might not) lead to, but apparently it’s all conjecture, especially since everyone here has dismissed Bennett’s book out-of-hand because he’s a “religious righter.” We certainly can’t use whatever statistics he may have honestly come by in his research in this discussion. :)</p>
<p>I haven’t read Bennets book but I read thomas sowells
I don’t dismiss stuff just because they are conservative, but it does help to determine perspective.
My sister for example dismissed the university of washingtons classics program for her daughter because they had a “women in antiquity” class.
Now if she had just said it was an awful program I wouldn’t necessarily be able to get useful information out of that- but knowing that it was "awful " because of something other than * dead white guy* perspective, that gave me some context.</p>
<p>Levon Helm <a href=“http://www.levonhelm.com/midnight_ramble.htm[/url]”>http://www.levonhelm.com/midnight_ramble.htm</a></p>
<p>I was just disappointed nobody mentioned Little Sammy Davis</p>
<p><a href=“http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Band[/url]”>http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Band</a></p>
<p>We were just having fun. The Band was so big in my world at that time and Levon was part of that. The great thing about CC is that we care about kids and ideas. I hope we can keep that up, even though our ideas differ at times.</p>
<p>A band called “The Band.” Brilliant!</p>
<p>I’m surprised I haven’t heard of them before now.</p>
<p>“My own experience is that when everyone’s naked, the guys spend 95% of their mental energy on what I will delicately call self-control.”</p>
<p>(Laughing hysterically) I don’t doubt the truth of that! Actually, the whole scenario sounds potentially very painful, both physically and emotionally for males. (still laughing!)</p>
<p>The whole scene must be literally fraught with danger: Where to let one’s eyes rest, and for how long? How to carry on a conversation while avoiding the almost inevitable freudian slip. How to “size up” (pun most definitely intended) the competition without appearing to do so. How to pretend that one isn’t actually mortified by the fact that all the girls can see that one’s “endowment” is smaller than average. Or conversely, pretend that one’s ego isn’t invested in one’s own “over endowment”. How to mingle while suppressing the tingle. How to avoid having things “pop up” unexpectedly. How to pretend that this is all a perfectly logical thing for reasonable adults to undertake.</p>
<p>Yeah, I can see the draw for such an event: Part intellectual exercise. Part, “Aren’t we all just so above petty fleshly things?” Part grist for the wincing retelling twenty years hince. Part ride down that river in Egypt. All childish flouting of “the rules” under the guise of intellectual superiority.</p>
<p>Got to be a touchy subject [irresistable]. After you see my wife, all else leaves me cold. I have no problems in spending my mental energies on other subjects. </p>
<p>Reed is within easy 2-3 hours drive time to several hot springs in the woods of the Cascades. Its awesome to be in a hot spring when snow is falling, sound of the river, and gently swaying fir trees. Clothing is optional but bring towel because there are no towels at a couple of springs.</p>