Not gonna watch it, but if you spend that amount of effort on the proposal, then you are most likely all about the wedding and not so much about the marriage. If I were a betting woman, I wouldn’t bet on them staying together very long.
I, too, skipped ahead. I didn’t hate it and even thought some of it was very sweet. There were lots of shots of him when, IMO, he could have used the dog or other props and, though he included some shots of her, I thought there could have been a lot more of them together and less of him. I feel that engagements and weddings have just gotten so big and, like Massmomm said, it becomes more about the wedding instead of the marriage.
These don’t bother me though they’re not my cup of tea. My own proposal was relatively public (at our housewarming party) where everyone knew what was going to happen (friends and family) but me. It was perfect for us in our context and it’s on video because people were filming what I thought was a housewarming speech.
To each his/her own. I don’t necessarily believe that these people will necessarily be more about the wedding than the marriage. Personally, I think that’s kind of an unfair assumption.
I think it’s an unfair assumption too. The two are not mutually exclusive.
For some reason, there is a huge amount of judgment, across all threads I have read on CC, about big weddings and anything associated with them. It seems that people are OK with spending a tremendous amounts of time and money on everything else- clothes, vacations, haircuts, designer purses, countertops, just not weddings or wedding-related items. It’s like there is some sort of a secret taboo on expensive weddings.
Personally, if I were to get married, I would go for an expensive wedding. I normally don’t care for extravagant things - don’t own expensive sports cars or designer brands or get my hair done - but for that one life event, yes, I would want it to be a big event - not to show off, not to impress, but because it’s a big deal, and that’s how I would want to celebrate. I think it’s pretty ridiculous to judge people for that or imply that someone getting excited about the proposal and the wedding (and not keeping it low-key, which is somehow seen as the ideal) makes them a bad husband or wife or someone who doesn’t focus on or respect the marriage itself.
Acollegestudent, the difference here is in who earned the money that was spent lavishly and whether anything was borrowed as unsecured debt. I am sure you will be paying for your own lavish wedding without borrowing a penny, the same way we pay for fancy purses and kitchen countertops. 
" I think it’s pretty ridiculous to judge people for that or imply that someone getting excited about the proposal and the wedding (and not keeping it low-key, which is somehow seen as the ideal) makes them a bad husband or wife or someone who doesn’t focus on or respect the marriage itself."
It is the fact that the guy posted the video on YouTube immediately after getting a “yes” answer for the entire world to see that some posters here find odd - not the proposal itself.
I do indeed plan to pay for my own wedding, if I decide to get married
But to the topic at hand, I don’t think the guy in the video acquired debt for the lavish proposal, so why all the judgment of the couple, something as harsh as saying they wouldn’t last? Why should everyone want or want to give a quiet proposal at a restaurant?
OK, @BunsenBurner, if it’s the YouTube part that’s bothering people, THAT I could see, although I would want to know more - did the girl maybe want it posted to share with friends? I think there is a lot we don’t know.
My post was about this:
" It seems that people are OK with spending a tremendous amounts of time and money on everything else- clothes, vacations, haircuts, designer purses, countertops, just not weddings or wedding-related items. It’s like there is some sort of a secret taboo on expensive weddings."
I’m sure the video was done on a shoestring budget.
I wasn’t judging this guy or couple. Speaking for my posts, I was saying it wasn’t MY personal preference to have such a public proposal and I prefer a private one. But I don’t care what others do and to each their own.
“Not gonna watch it, but if you spend that amount of effort on the proposal, then you are most likely all about the wedding and not so much about the marriage. If I were a betting woman, I wouldn’t bet on them staying together very long.”
" I feel that engagements and weddings have just gotten so big and, like Massmomm said, it becomes more about the wedding instead of the marriage."
^^^ This is what I was referring to. I think personal preferences for a quiet wedding or proposal are fine, but it’s the negative attitudes against those not wanting a quiet proposal that I don’t like. I can only speak for myself, but I take the idea of marriage and commitment extremely seriously, but I also would want a big wedding and proposal. The two are not mutually exclusive. I am sure I am not alone. I just cringe every time a wedding/proposal/ring/prom thread comes around, because big inevitably gets equated with bad, designed to impress/outdo others, and just overall negative. I like big, surprising, unique, unexpected - and that applies not only to receiving but to giving (for special occasions for those close to me, of course). If I were a guy, I would absolutely do a clever, surprising proposal. It’s just my personality, like wearing crazy socks and backpacks - I don’t like bland, expected, or customary.
A private proposal can be well done, thought out, & romantic (or even cost money) and not be “bland, expected or customary”…just sayin’. I don’t think the issue is the lavishness…at least not to me…but more that I personally prefer a proposal to be intimate and not public.
For example, if it were me…and using the situation in the YouTube video that started this thread…the guy could have made his fiancee a video and done the proposal on the beach and shown her the video and proposed to her on the beach…just the two of them. The video could also have been private.
I actually agree with you on that point - I wouldn’t want the video to be posted on YouTube by the guy, if it was coming from him. I also wouldn’t want other people to know before I did. For me, I like the unique aspect of it, not the publicity aspect.
Boring. My favourite crazy wedding proposal was the one where the Air Force paratrooper parachuted on to a football field during halftime at a game (where of course some friends had gotten his girlfriend out in the middle) then get proposed right there. Second best would be the “promposal” where the guy was a private pilot and taped “PROM?” or something onto the underside of the wings of a small plane and buzzed the girl’s house.
I would be upset if either of my daughters received this marriage proposal. Why? Because I learned too much about the dynamics of their relationship from this video. Not only was the video a 15 minute advertisement at how cool and sexy Mr. Future Husband is, but when the video ended by telling her to turn around, Mr. Future Husband was standing a fair distance from Miss Future Wife. I was waiting for him to walk over to her and get down on one knee. I think she was, too, because she hesitated. But he remained stationary with the expectation that she would come to him.
I don’t want my daughters to be in a relationship like that.
I also question whether he made the video over the course of a year. The lip syncing to a song over the course of several days seemed too seamless for it to be authentic.
I’ve seen videos of some pretty amazing marriage proposals, but they were focused on the relationship and the surprise element.
Doing it: weird but kind of cute too.
Putting it up on the web: total narcissism, lack of boundaries, no, no. no.
I didn’t watch the whole thing. 12 days or so was enough for me.
I know nothing about how Youtube videos get publicized, but it seems logical to me that he likely did more than just stick his video on Youtube to generate the attention he got. I wonder if he sent out press releases or engaged in other sorts of PR to get press attention for his video. Or maybe there was some kind of contest? I could be completely wrong though.
I really do wish I understood this better. Malcolm Gladwell needs to update The Tipping Point!
I don’t know what to make of the whole lip synching thing unless he knew where he left off the day before, backed up a lyric or two for splicing together…and then continued.
I too expected him to go to her and get down on one knee.
@mom2collegekids, I notice that we think a lot alike in situations like this. It’s good to know I’m not alone.
I didn’t watch it because I already hate it. I am hearing more and more of this kind of thing and I just can’t stand it. i have 2 daughters, both of them with long term boyfriends. I pray to God that these boys don’t get this kind of thing in his head. I do not want to be part of the “surprise”.
A friend of mine who is a music teacher was leading a concert the other night and at the end one of the students made a big spectacle of asking a girl to the prom. Their moms were there with the cameras ready for the big moment. Ugh!!! It makes my skin crawl. Just ask her in the back seat of a car the way we used to do it in the old days! 
It’s kind of like the trend of everyone-and-their-mother in the delivery room :-). Uh, no thanks!