<p>After spending hours upon hours doing research about NPD (Narcissistic Personality Disorder) I realize that I actually fit EVERY symptom of it… I’m 100% certain that I have this… Everything I read actually scared me, because it described be to a T… It’s like a perfect description of my emotions, thoughts, relationships, actions, everything… What should I do? I realize I should seek psychological help, but I don’t actually want to… Ahah, and everything I’ve read says I won’t want to… But maybe you all can convince me, or just tell me anything worthwhile… I didn’t know what else to do. I tried to call the person I’m closest to in my life, but then told her I couldn’t tell her, and hung up. So maybe y’all, the wise parents of CC, can help me…? Somehow…? I really need it, I can’t go anywhere else… Even posting this has required an immense amount of thought. Thanks. </p>
<p>I see from your other posts that you are still an teenager.</p>
<p>People your age all have all sorts of narcissistic traits. You are supposed to have those traits right now. It’s not possible, really, to diagnose NPD until you are in your twenties.</p>
<p>In the meantime, just try to be aware of the people around you a little bit. It’s a developmentally healthy thing to be where you are right now. Just be worried if you are still there when you get into your 20’s.</p>
<p>Anyway, I doubt you are. Just the fact that you realize youve been self-involved probably just means you’re growing up a little bit. Good luck.</p>
<p>My mom has a mild- well, maybe not so mild- form of this disorder. She doesn’t know it, however, and probably either wouldn’t admit it, or if she did, wouldn’t see anything wrong with it. She’s 83.
Mom has been married and divorced three times. All three times, it was “his fault,” naturally. My mom has always been unable to see herself objectively in any way, and pretty much created her own misery in her marriages. I know, I was there.
If you truly believe you have this, please seek professional help. I do think there is a good chance you actually don’t have this disorder, but are just a bit immature. A psych evaluation might help you understand your strengths and weaknesses relating to others, and be of immense help throughout your life. The fact that you are even considering this makes me think you probably don’t have NPD.
People with NPD are basically very unhappy people because they can’t allow others to see who they really are. They usually don’t even see themselves accurately, or anything close to it. You don’t want to live this way, believe me. You won’t have any true friends and even your own family won’t like you very much. If you recognize traits of NPD in yourself, you can overcome them with a little work. The fact that you even recognize a problem is a huge step in overcoming it. Do seek assistance. You won’t be sorry.</p>
<p>Another long-time poster here, using my “alternative” name.
I recently realized that my H of 25 years has NPD. (This came out because we are currently in counseling–after I caught him having an affair). After one interview with H, the counselor told me to Google NPD.
What an eye-opener, but sad for me to realize that H can’t truly care about or love anyone but himself. I feel like a fool for being blind to this disorder all these years. Part of what H “hates” about me is that I know his faults! (How could I not know him after 25 years? Though I still love/admire him for his good qualities, everything is black/white with him.) He only likes shallow relationships where he can present himself in the best light. It has been a rough, and at times abusive relationship.
However, we do have a lot of commitment to repairing our marriage. We have many reasons to stay together, kids still at home, and a lot of happy times together–in spite of all the bad stuff. (Wish me luck. It’s hard. Not only do I have to go on with “business as usual,” pretending “nothing” is going on when my life has turned into a soap opera–but I am mourning the loss of what I thought was a relationship that I never really had and never will have with H. That makes looking at the next 25 years not such a happy thought unless we are able to make some serious changes.)</p>
<p>BTW, I read that it is common for teenagers to be Narcissistic. OP, I hope you can outgrow it. You should see a counselor, though. And try to FOCUS on OTHERS for their sake (not to benefit your own reputation, gain admiration, etc.) Can you truly GIVE to another person? Do you SACRIFICE for others when they are down or hurt, without expecting anything in return–or are you a fair weather friend who can’t deal with anything negative? Do you think of people as “useful” or “not useful” to your goals and treat them as tools or obstacles, accordingly? Other people are special, too! You don’t deserve any better than they do. You have to make yourself vulnerable to be truly loved. Don’t be afraid–you may be surprised that people will love you–even with your faults exposed. Can you be HONEST?–tell the truth without worrying about what people will expect to hear and how that will affect their opinion of you? Can you take responsibility for your own weaknesses and mistakes without trying to blame others?
Can you say, “I’m sorry, it was all my fault,” and mean it? These are just a few random thoughts/questions that came to my mind. Maybe you’ve already asked yourself these or seen them on the websites. Best of luck to you. If you truly do have NPD, best to deal with it through counseling now than to let it ruin potential future relationships.</p>
<p>if you are a teen and especially a girl(no offence) id say you are normal if you are narcissist. narcissism is just one of the traits that come and go with adolescence. if not checked it could however enter into your later adult life too.</p>
<p>Poetgrl is right. If you are a teen, you may just be very normal, and can’t be adequately diagnosed yet. I have a close friend whose a clinical psychologist (and a mom). She was saying that every teen would be diagnosed with at least one personality disorder if we didn’t take their age into account!</p>
<p>If you feel your quality of life could be better, then seek counseling. You need not self -diagnose, nor let others define what is a problem. It is great to want understand oneself better, and we all have a variety of traits that serve us more or less well. If you would like to learn new ways of handling things, get some support for your stress, or develop more meaningful relationships, counseling can help. Few people, regardless of diagnosis, are optimizing all areas of their life at once. But you have to be curious about what counseling could do for you. Good luck.</p>
<p>Teen years are characterized by self absorption, self reflection, I’m the center of the universe, me-ism, and abject selfishness.
It’s the wall of fire that most teens go through and come out an evolved, better person.
For some, it works for others, not so much.</p>
<p>NPD isn’t a disorder unless it’s having a negative impact on your life.</p>
<p>Personality disorders are also very difficult to treat, because they are so deep-rooted. Almost no effective therapy exists. You can’t completely change who you are.</p>
<p>You don’t need a therapist, and I doubt it would help anyway. If you weren’t having problems before you found out you fit criteria for a disorder and therefore labeling yourself with a disorder, you shouldn’t have problem now.</p>
<p>The poster has posted as a guy in his previous posts, btw. (And I don’t really think that teen girls are markedly more self-absorbed than teen guys.) </p>
<p>He may or may not have NPD; he may or may not be experiencing a normal stage of adolescence. We are a bunch of strangers on the internet. We don’t know. If he really wants to get somewhere in discussing the subject, he should find a psychologist. </p>
<p>I’m impressed, though, that the OP has the self-awareness to consider NPD a possibility. My experience with narcissists is that they’re unaware they have a problem - the problem is always with every one else in their lives. Good luck, OP. Hope you can find the information you’re looking for.</p>
<p>Yes, as a psychologist, I can tell you that the incidence of an adolecent with NPD arriving in my office on his own afraid he might have NPD and actually HAVING NPD is 0.</p>
<p>I’m not saying it can’t happen. But, the likelihood that someone with NPD at even 50 would believe “they” had a problem is very small. At 16 or 17? </p>
<p>Anyway, OP, nobody should discourage you from taking your concerns to a therapist. </p>
<p>@frazzled1 sorry i didnt want to mean it that way. its just that teen boys are too much competing among themselves to be much of narcissists. however as a thumb rule all teenagers are more narcissists than people from other age groups regardless of whether they are boys or girls.</p>
<p>NPD occurs much more frequently in men than in women.</p>
<p>Not that this changes my opinion about OP, who is already showing a level of awareness which would be difficult to reconcile with such a DX. JMO</p>
<p>really? i thought its the other way round. gotta check it out. i will fail in my psychology tests lol. btw it doesnt really matter does it? what matters is that the OP is a teen and he/she is not suffering(neither enjoying) from NPD. lol.</p>