<p>My daughter who is a junior- has little idea of where she wants to attend school- other than she wants to major in biology at a school that also offers a marine science major.
The college fair is today- and I have made a list of schools she might want to consider- I even made stickers with her name and address.( for the interest forms)
Unfortunately she was ill yesterday and didn’t attend school- she feels better today but we have a policy if you miss school- you don’t get to do any extra things on the weekend- which I think this would count as.</p>
<p>She really doesn’t care about going to the fair- & the time I went with oldest- it was pretty overwhelming. Younger D is not going to be someone who comes off well in a situation like that.</p>
<p>The overall information is helpful, but I am thinking- should I have her go?
She is planning on taking a year off, but what if she doesn’t?
Should I go and just pick up a bag of paper? ( which would probably be all we did anyway)
It is pouring here though- and not very pleasant to think of venturing out * until April* :p</p>
<p>I’ve heard of schools that don’t let you participate in an extracurricular activity after school or in the evening if you miss school that day, but I’ve never heard of one that won’t let a student who misses school on Friday participate in a weekend activity. Boy, you live in a strict community.</p>
<p>I guess your daughter shouldn’t take the risk of being caught and suspended, but it’s a shame to miss the college fair.</p>
<p>no- no no-
That is * my* parental decision=
Am I overly strict?
I just always reasoned that they needed to make an effort to attend school- especially on Friday- to get assignments for weekend etc.
IF they weren’t able to go on friday- then they should be recuperating over the weekend so that they can be sure to be able to attend school on Monday.
Not have a miracle recovery Saturday morning
So perhaps I should motivate her to go?</p>
<p>I personally would have her go… now, if she wanted to go out with friends or something to that extent, then I would support not letting her go… Maybe the fair will spark her interest?</p>
<p>My two cents-A/DD stayed home from school because she was ILL.-unless it was a food poisening situation, she probably still does not feel up to par. B/DD isn’t too interested at this juncture to go to the fair. I would save the stickers for another time when A & B are no longer an issue-and DD wants to make an informed choice from her options. She will be more empowered.</p>
<p>encourage her to go…and your rule, well, you need to be more flexible on that, especially for soething like this, something may give her some clues about what she wants to do in her future</p>
<p>talking to the admin people, while even just for a couple of minutes can help ease the stress if one has to go for longer interviews</p>
<p>say it was the SAT today, would you have her stay home? soetimes when our kids our in HS we need to trust them some and also push them some</p>
<p>to think this is a normal extra thing, well, yes, I think you are too strict, flexibilty is paramount, and sometimes doing things even though we aren’t perfectly healthy is necessary, what about a job, if she was working, would you allow her to work today</p>
<p>having a Jr, well, you need to be more adjustable, because things come up and kids have responsibilities, what if she had a school project she needed to do with others, what if she was doing a volunteer project…you do need to adjust that rule imo</p>
<p>why is she taking a gap year? and already knowing that now? is she motivated for college? if not that is okay…jsut wondering</p>
<p>How about a compromise? Go to the fair but compromise on the number of colleges she should look at. Give her a reasonable number, say 2 or 3 and let her pick the colleges. If she is worried she won’t do well, maybe don’t do number 1 choice. Use this as a “practice” session. She needs to begin getting comfortable with college admissions people and this is a less stressful way to do this than one on one at a college visit. After she has visited the targeted number of booths, if she wants to leave, you’re outta there. If not, let her control the rest of the evening even if it is just wandering around or saying hello to friends.</p>
<p>she knows she is taking a gap year- because her sister did- and that was a very successful decision
A gap year will give her more time to pursue some of her interests - like doing a semester at sea & or getting her divemasters off the Great Barrier Reef.( right now- she is leading the planning of a marine biology trip in July to Queensland)</p>
<p>She isn’t really interested in the fair- and since neither one of us likes crowds I think I will skip it.
She already has spoken to several admission people that have come to her high school-although most of the colleges that have been represented are schools that are fairly competitive like Brown and Princeton.
( and I could have her practice by talking to one of her sisters friends who is an adcom )</p>
<p>If it was the SAT- I wouldn’t have her stay home- but it isn’t something like that- to me- it is like the Home show or anyone of those big things with tables and brochures- I try and stay away from those</p>
<p>I understand the points- but frankly, when I went with older D, we didn’t get much out of it & I think we went during the weekday with her class- I can just imagine how crowded it is today-</p>
<p>I will try and find some smaller venues for her to look at though-</p>
<p>I would go crazy if we had a rule like yours in my family because of all the gray-area cases like the ones that citygirlsmom listed. I’m not smart enough to figure out how to enforce that sort of rule.</p>
<p>Considering your daughter’s highly specialized interests, a college fair may not be all that useful. Is there some better way of obtaining information about marine science programs?</p>
<p>usually it isn’t an issue-
if they are feeling yuck on Friday- ( im not talking about vomiting and fever)but they know that they have something they don’t want to miss on Saturday- they are more likely to go to school anyway and get what they can out of it.
Because both of my kids have learning issues, because their classes covered a lot, it made a huge difference to miss even a day of school.
If you aren’t contagious, after school you can always come right home and rest. But if you are so ill that you can’t bring yourself to attend even one class- I still feel in most circumstances, you should take it easy the next day, and going to a huge fair- with a lot of walking- not only around the venue, but just from where we parked- being around a lot of people ( which is also a huge stress for the way we are wired) isn’t taking it easy.
I appreciate the comments though- it has been helpful to hear how other people do it</p>
