Fashion Q: so many of these dresses have belts. Am I alone in this, but I don’t like to draw attn to my waist, or what should be a waist. I’d rather a sheath, or a drop waist, for the rare occasion that I put on a dress.
Mom2aphysicsgeek, congrats!!! As a MOG, I’d ask to see what the MOB is wearing. I think that would help to,decide long, short, maybe color ( just so don’t clash).
I never heard of blue tuxes. Are the men renting these? Would they ever wear them again? Is this a new style?
@NEPatsGirl
You know how you liked that dress I showed you from Sundance Catalogue in dusty blue, but then you decided against it due to reviews? (as aside, I would have tried it because half the reviews were positive and half were not, and those that were not had to do with fit and so that is pretty individual). Anyway, it made me think of the site where i got my dress for my younger daughter’s wedding. I know you want short or knee length and here are some suggestions for you along the lines of the dress you said you liked that I gave you from Sundance:
https://natayadresses.com/en/nataya-dresses/440-nataya-al-252-party-dress-in-sapphire.html
https://natayadresses.com/en/nataya-dresses/442-nataya-al-254-party-dress-in-sapphire.html
https://natayadresses.com/en/nataya-dresses/527-nataya-al-237-party-dress-in-onyx.html
https://natayadresses.com/en/nataya-dresses/434-nataya-al-235-party-dress-in-sapphire.html
@bookworm, I’m with you regarding belts. I’m thin, but don’t have a waist, plus I’m short waisted, so adding a belt makes me look ridiculous.
As I look at the links posted, I realize that many of you must have fantastic shapes. I could never look good in sheer, lacy, print flowy dresses.
As a future mother of the bride (June 2020), I’m following this thread closely, and see I need to adjust my concept of what the mother of the bride typically wears. So far the links to Alex Evenings are more my style.
@FlyMeToTheMoon . I wore this dress in cobalt to my niece’s December evening wedding. It’s one piece, but looks like 2. Beaded and sparkly bodice. Very dressy and suitable for dancing. This dress ran large. I wore a 12 in Adrianna Papell to my son’s wedding; this dress was large in a 10 (but the 8 was sold out). I like lace, but no prints or too loose and flowy. I like things more fitted; I’m curvy with a thicker waist. Plus, I’m a 60+ fading strawberry blond and black or pale are out.
@bookworm. Friend’s son is getting married in June. His one request was to wear a navy suit. Pale blond and looks ghastly in black or dark gray. Navy is not uncommon in our area, though gray is most popular for spring and summer. He’s actually wearing a medium navy.
@flymetotheMoon Keep in mind that this thread, mostly so far, has been about one MOG’s case. The OP appears to be thin and petite and the dress she started the thread with was for that type of shape. So, many of the suggestions here, including my own, were purely based on her needs, but not every MOG or MOB’s needs/shape! I will be the first to tell you that many dresses I suggested or others suggested on this thread, I could not wear as I am overweight. So, this thread is not an accurate depiction of all the kinds of dresses you could consider.
As a point of reference, I wore this to one daughter’s wedding:
https://www.saksfifthavenue.com/teri-jon-by-rickie-freeman-lace-pintuck-dress/product/0424757579754?FOLDER%3C%3Efolder_id=2534374306422146&R=631333736467&P_name=Teri+Jon+by+Rickie+Freeman&N=306422146+4294904359+4294904413&bmUID=mA79rsa
I wore this to the other daughter’s wedding:
https://natayadresses.com/en/nataya-dresses/372-nataya-downton-abbey-dress-40163-in-sapphire.html
Neither were super formal.
Thanks @dentmom4, that’s more in line with what I think of for mother of the bride, and it would work for me if the sizing is right.
Thanks, @soozievt. When I get more guidance from my daughter, I might start my own thread. There’s still time, but now I find any thread about MOB/MOG dress/shoes super interesting!
There is no one or few looks for MOB because each MOB has her own style, shape, likes/dislikes. Please wear YOU not what friends or a magazine prescribe a MOB to wear!
I love this thread. I’m learning a lot. Still, I understand a blue suit, but asking the best men to wear blue tuxes? That’s what I don’t understand.
Sooziet, I could easily buy your first dress. That second one, WOW. That is a statement dress,
@bookworm, maybe they are renting suits? But I was pretty sure she said navy tuxes. Don’t tuxes come in all colors?
@soozievt I nearly spit my coffee at the screen when you mentioned thin and petite, but thank you. You have descibed me well twenty years ago. I’m a size 12 and I’m 5’1 with a thick waist. And as someone else mentioned I’m avoiding belts, especially ribbons. I bought a fit and flare for the rehearsal dinner many months ago and that style really isn’t flattering, or maybe its the particular dress as its not light and airy, more heavy and embelllished.
@Mom2aphysicsgeek I’m not sure what determines formality myself. This wedding is late afternoon with a sunset reception on a cliffside overlooking the ocean at an upscale golf club so I think its formal. The wedding party is all wearing long dresses. They’ll have all the bells and whistles. But, I’m not comfortable in formal wear so I’m trying to be as appropriate as possible while still maintaining my comfort.
My S and future DIL were not very helpful when I asked what they thought. They are flying up with her Mom the first weekend in March for a dinner tasting at the venue, a cake tasting at the bakery, and an open house the next day to choose particular items for the reception (I assume). I am meeting them for both days and I’ll have dinner with her Mom while they have their dinner tasting with other wedding couple to be. We can chat then and I’ll get an idea of what she is doing. I’m quite sure she is going all out with a long MOB gown and all the fixings, although she is hardly a fashion diva. Nor am I.
On another note, I was am very happy to be included in this weekend with them!
@NEPatsGirl You and I sound similiar. I am equally not comfortable in formal wear. (Like I said, I am a t-shirt and jeans kind of person.) I suspect the MOb is going to be in a long dress and heels. That is so, so, so not me (as I sit here with a pony tail and my normal attire!) I also don’t want to look matronly which is how I feel whenever I try on formal clothing bc I am also short and about a size 12. And I don’t like heels.
I’m not a fan of the first dress posted by the OP. I think it’s too summery and casual for an end of September wedding, and I don’t know what’s going on with the waistline, but it appears to be elasticized, which is not going to be flattering. I’m also not a fan of heavily beaded dresses, and I would not pair those beaded shoes with a beaded dress.
@soozievt may have already posted this one, and several similar:
With the OP’s budget, I’d go with a simple, classic dress (which will also photograph well) rather than something with a lot of embellishment that could end up looking cheap.
TJMaxx online has lots of TeriJon and similar dresses at great prices. I rarely find anything at their brick & mortar stores anymore but was surprised to see the strength of their online selection.
I’m a pony tail and jeans type person too, but if the MOB is wearing a long dress, I’d go for a long dress too. I lean towards more simple, though I will confess to loving @soozievt 's Downton Abby dress, which as I recall was very appropriate to the style of that wedding.
Lots and lots of suggestions here.
I would strongly suggest you order a few that you like, including your original choice. And don’t wait or you might be disappointed to find that your size is no longer in stock.
Try some on. See which styles and fabrics…and colors suit you. This will give you much better direction.
Is the other mom wearing a full length dress to the wedding? If so, at least try on a few. Remember that in the pictures, you all will be there. You want those to look good too because after the wedding ends, it’s all you will have left.
I’ve been to weddings where the moms wore long dresses to the ceremony and the start of the reception…through dinner, but then changed into something shorter for the dancing. That is worth considering too.
My dress was Alex Evenings and I loved it. Their prices are modest, and they have a nice assortment.
@yauponredux Wow, thank you so much. And free returns to my local store which is just 10 miles away! At the very least, I can try on different “names” and see how they fit but I just did a quick look (I’m working) and will spend some time later tonight choosing a few. Certainly, the prices are right.
@NEPatsGirl , I’m going to give some comment/advice that will not go well with everyone here.
Many people here on CC and in real life are all about the formal, glitzy wedding experience. They love it, enjoy it and believe it is or should be standard protocol. It works for them and that is 100% fine!
I am you. A long dress and glitzy shoes and any other bling would be like putting me in a clown suit. Totally awkward, the opposite of my personality, a waste of $$$ and not a confidence builder. I would be SO uncomfortable and unhappy - it would not make me feel special or happy.
That isn’t to say I don’t like putting on a dress or a pretty pair of shoes. I wear dresses nearly every day to work. I like quality shoes but they are not heels, they are not sparkly.
My S and DIL knew this about me and without hesitation told me to choose a dress that I loved and made me feel good. When I found a short dress (black and white, sleeveless, above the knee, a little flowy, just a little sparkly near the collar) I showed it to them as a possibility they were fully in favor. It was dressy in a fun, not stuffy way. Oh, that describes me so perfectly! It was ME. I loved wearing it. I still have it and would wear it again. I’ve watched the video of my S and me doing the mother-son dance over and over again (it too was very untraditional - a really fun upbeat song that has meaning with me and my kids from when they were little) - and it looks not out of place at all! I danced all night in that dress and my simple black sandal that had a 2 inch wedge heel (which I recently sold because I haven’t worn them again since the wedding going on 3 years ago - 2 inch heel is not my daily choice!)
The MOB chose the traditional long dress with a little bling. It’s what she wanted. Our pics look just fine. It’s not like I was wearing lime green! 
I think you should have a honest conversation with your S, FDIL, MOB when you’re together and run by what you’re thinking and be honest about what is YOU. Surely you can find a compromise!
Choose a dress that you can’t wait to tear off the hanger and put on. That you will beam with satisfaction and self confidence when wearing it. It’s a dress. A dress for a moment. When you look back at the photos I want you to think “Damn, I loved that dress!” not “Ugh, that long formal dress was SO not me”.
And you have plenty of time! You’re find the perfect one.
@abasket thank you, you captured my feelings very well.