<p>D is visiting bf’s family right now, then they’ll be coming here for a few days. We’ve met bf at school and he doesn’t seem pretentious. But as he comes from a different/much higher socio-economic background, I’m somewhat nervous about him coming here. Help calm my nerves CC family!</p>
<p>He is much more worried that you like him than he is thinking about your socioeconomic status:).</p>
<p>I was a high socio-economic kid. I never paid attention to the socioeconomic status of my BFs families, only wanted to make a good impression…</p>
<p>Now that is something not to worry about! The boy is probably just very anxious that you’ll like him, and he surely already recognizes the difference in backgrounds. He and your daughter have likely had to deal with this already in their relationship, so it’s not as if he’ll be surprised. </p>
<p>I thought this post was going to be about the dreaded guest room or no? question! :)</p>
<p>Nope, we & D discussed sleeping arrangements ahead of time.</p>
<p>I think part of my worry is she’s gone there first and we’re definitely going to pale in comparison.</p>
<p>He’s trying to impress you, not the other way around.</p>
<p>BTW, I dated a much older guy when I was 19 from a wealthy family (I was not!) and I was shocked at the difference in mores. They had a cocktail at 5 p.m. come hell or high water (my mother never drank), and they put us in the same room. I was shocked and asked for a separate room. I think the fact that their son was a man, and I was a sophomore in college was the main problem in this situation. :)</p>
<p>I agree with the others, it’s a non-issue, and please keep in mind that it WILL make him uncomfortable if you continually apologize for your circumstances. </p>
<p>My daughter was friends with a girl whose family was much more wealthy than we were, and they lived in a fabulous house, while we lived in a run-down fixer-upper with peeling paint and rotted siding. But the kids spent WAY more time here than they did there. </p>
<p>It will be fine.</p>
<p>Thanks everyone. I <strong>know</strong> it’s silly to worry about and I would never apologize for having less. I just needed some perspective from my wise CC buds.</p>
<p>I’ve had visiting kids from nicer houses than ours say, “your house is more like a home.” I consider this a high compliment indeed, and can be achieved no matter how big or small the house, but has the most to do with how welcoming/at ease the parents are, IMHO. You’ll do great.</p>
<p>I grew up on a farm - a real working tobacco farm - and I’m sure I have never brought a friend or boyfriend to the farm - from college on - who wasn’t from a higher socioeconomic background than I. I’m sure my mom worried about it when I was in college. I remember bringing a boyfriend home, and I told him we were having roast beef for dinner. After dinner, he asked me if I thought that was really roast beef. Turns out it was pot roast - who knew!! My boyfriends would take pictures of the cows, the chickens, the pigs and the tobacco. My dad always got a kick out of that. I realized that they fascinated by the way I grew up.</p>
<p>I agree with everyone else. He will be much more concerned about you liking him than anything else!</p>
<p>You will not pale in comparison. Have fun! It’s a great opportunity to share in something important to your daughter. </p>
<p>Let us know how things go! :)</p>
<p>I came from an upper-middle class/affluent family and my first H’s family lived in public housing. Meant nothing to me. I loved them and hung out comfortablly there. Without ever a thought about the differences in their “status.”</p>
<p>What matters is how they treated me (with open arms and love because their S loved me) and how I felt about them as people. It’s all about making him comfortable and accepted, not about “creature comforts.” </p>
<p>But I know I’d have the same worries if I were you ;).</p>
<p>I know exactly how you feel. We live in an extremely affluent school district, but in a small section that is middle class. I was very nervous when my kids were younger because many of their friends live in huge, beautiful homes, have live-in housekeepes and au pairs, and our house was teeny-tiny (we have since renovated and doubled it in size - but it is still very small compared to most of their friends’ homes) and very lived-in. </p>
<p>It was honestly never a problem - their friends loved coming here - many have said it felt very homey. The other interesting thing is that S, as much as he enjoys the amenities at many of his friends’ homes (beautiful, huge inground pools with hot tubs and cabanas, tennis courts, full basketball courts), he says that he is glad that our house is not that big because he would never see his parents. It seems that in some of these houses, they just speak to each other via intercom, and kids and parents don’t really spend much time together. So, there are some things about your lifestyle that her BF might really appreciate - things that are lacking in his own home (not saying that is the case - but you never know). Just wanted to wish you good luck.</p>
<p>In case no one has told any of you today - you guys are terrific!</p>
<p>I come from a very affluent family and my first boyfriend came from a family of more modest means. I think I was more nervous meeting his family than they were meeting me.</p>
<p>However, they were somewhat nervous when my parents invited them to our house for dinner one evening. They are a great group of people and their son is happy and currently serving in the military.</p>
<p>Just be yourself and everything will be fine. Lots of smiles :)</p>
<p>At least your daughter wants you to get to know the BF.
We just see the BF briefly, haven’t had a chance to talk to him much.</p>
<p>My d and her bf are currently here for a visit. She has been “best friends” with this guy for a long time now, but they only started “dating” a couple of months ago so, even though her dad and I have known him for a while, this is the first time we have been around the two of them as a “Couple”. Plus, her two older brothers are very eager to GET TO KNOW HIM (wink-wink). They have a whole good cop/bad cop routine worked up, I think!</p>
<p>Seriously, we had a wonderful time together last night and plan to get together again tonight. I am sure you will have an equally delightful time!</p>