New 3.0 to 3.3 (GPA) Parents Thread

Parents Forum
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<p>nemom: I punctuated that wrong ;)</p>

<p>I think that what gweeta may have meant was that if her kid had a higher stats profile he would have had more options either with school choice or merit money. But think we can all agree that he has some wonderful options as is. :)</p>

<p>Emmybet, I’ll be here for the next few years. DDs were in class of 09 and DS in the Class of 13. I was hooked on college research by them and now, well don’t tell my kid but I am already enjoying learning about new schools.</p>

<p>There is a dizzying array of great schools out there for kids in our kids’ ranges and I would not have know that before this thread.</p>

<p>gweeta agree that if we met in person we would all hit it off famously!</p>

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<p>NEMom, I’m really grateful he has the choices he does, but as HMom noted, I simply wish he had a broader range. </p>

<p>He’s struggling with the fact that “no one” has heard of the schools he’s considering. At some level, he’s internalized my message that there are plenty of great schools your friends/family haven’t heard of, but I can tell he wishes he’d gotten into at least one school he considers “brand name” (like his girlfriend, best friend, cousins, etc.). Not that he would have actually chosen such a school over the ones on his list, but at least he could say he turned down a school someone he knows has heard of. </p>

<p>Considering that he didn’t work up to his potential until the end of his junior year, it’s a regret I fully understand. He should have stepped up sooner, and he knows it. The nice thing, however, is it’s also a regret I think he’ll get past soon enough.</p>

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<p>^^^Ditto what queeta said ^^^</p>

<p>My son has locked in on Carthage College in Kenosha Wisconsin. If no one in his school had heard of it before they certainly have by now (Son proudly wears his new t-shirt / sweatpants wardrobe) It might not be a top school, but we feel it was a great choice for him and I am hopeful he will succeed.</p>

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<p>I should have added, as HMom also noted, that I wish he had qualified for better merit aid. </p>

<p>I always knew we’d get no need-based assistance, and we tried to save with that in mind. Still, when you actually see the differences in the merit-based aid from school to school, it’s hard not to wish he’d put it in gear sooner.</p>

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<p>“Considering that he didn’t work up to his potential until the end of his junior year, it’s a regret I fully understand. He should have stepped up sooner, and he knows it.”</p>

<p>I felt a little heat for suggesting this before, but does Wayne on this thread factor that into funding the next for years?</p>

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<p>Shrinkrap, I’m not following.</p>

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<p>Gweeta, now I understand. I have not had this problem with my younger son, who is really not involved with “college talk” at school, and does not follow rankings etc.
I went through “brand name” interest with my older son. In his mind if it had the rah, rah factor it was a good school and worthy of attending.</p>

<p>As far as merit aid for S2, most offers fell above our EFC, so many schools were still not affordable. For example, if a school costs 54,000 and they offered 20,000 in merit aid, without enough additional financial aid grants, it was still not doable for us. We had a fair number of schools that fell into this group.</p>

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<p>"Shrinkrap, I’m not following. "</p>

<p>Sigh…here goes…(last time I voiced an opinion on this I got a lot of grief)</p>

<p>I’m not sure I want to invest 200k plus for a private school, for a kid who did not “step up” until recently. He has a very clear upward trend, and I love him to death, but school and “love of learning” just don’t seem to be his “passion”. Fortunately he agrees with all that, and doesn’t think it makes sense to even LOOK at schools that cost $50K/year, but that REALLY limits his options. And he wants to stay in California; not sure why. While we don’t have that kind of money just “lying around”, we can find a way. He won’t be getting any need based aid. My head says give him a few more years to prove himself, but try to do it on the cheap.</p>

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<p>shrinkrap: no grief from here…exact same discussion that I had with my husband recently; the problem we face is that the said “on the cheap” schools have their own issues that may preclude our daughter to succeed in their environment…(as was exhibited in our over-crowded public HS school where teachers focused on the tippy top kids)…the freshman retention rates at some of these “on the cheap” schools are scary…</p>

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<p>I can understand your concerns, shrinkrap.</p>

<p>We are on the 3.0-3.3. thread here. These are all kids who didn’t make As in all of their classes, by definition. Some of them worked their butt off, and that’s as far as they could go. Some of them went to incredibly competitive schools and couldn’t get as good grades as at a basic school. Some took longer maturing. Some just aren’t that intellectual. The reasons number in the hundreds.</p>

<p>I agree that the goal can’t be the same for every kid: to go to the “best school possible,” period. How do we even define that? And is it truly worth the money? I have an older child at an elite private, for which we are paying in full. She is thrilled, feels she’s getting an extraordinary experience and entering a very select level of accomplishment in her field. Would she say she couldn’t have gotten it anywhere else, or for less money? I don’t think she’d go that far. She is grateful she’s had the opportunity she has.</p>

<p>Our D2 is in this group (OK, she might bump a 3.5 ultimately but she’s a very scattered test-taker). I would say her GPA is mostly because of maturing more slowly, and a bit also of less general talent. We will definitely be in the position of deciding between similar degrees at very widely-“ranked” (hate that word, but I can’t think of another way to put it) schools, at ridiculously varying costs. At some of them, I would myself say the education would be “better.” But will it be worth the money, in her case? Will she get eaten alive at those schools anyway? What about less elite privates that cost about as much as the more highly ranked ones? That’s probably the hardest set of schools to decide the financial value of.</p>

<p>I think I would do anything if she is shining with love for a school. After a rough time in middle and high school she really wants an extraordinary college experience. She is not interested in rankings, but she is thinking a lot about the small/big fish/pond question. I trust her gut feelings, after lots of college visits so far.</p>

<p>I don’t have any answers. I do think anyone who has “stepped up” ever, no matter how late, is showing that they have it in them. If any kid is really psyched about going to college, they’re going to make it worth the time and money. I don’t want to begrudge my D opportunities she can handle now that she’s grown up so much, just because she was a pain in the butt for a long time. If she pulls that kind of stunt again, then we’ll pull support, but if she’s there, we’re there with her. I will admit I’m kind of thinking lately that she might have a better chance if she doesn’t shoot too high, lose confidence and all she’s gained lately. But I don’t want to sell her short, either. The amount she’s matured these past few months, if it continues at this rate, will put her in great shape to succeed just about anywhere she’s thinking about going.</p>

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<p>Here’s another story: After a particularly frightful 6th grade, we considered sending this child to a private school for gifted kids (she’s quite advanced in creativity and performing arts). After all of the interviewing, the acceptance, and the weighing options, she chose to stay in our school system (we also offered her home schooling - that’s how angry we were with the environment she was in).</p>

<p>She was uncomfortable at that time with being on the lower end of a higher achievement spectrum (even though this gifted school specifically focused on the fact that talented kids have just as many maturity and other issues as anyone - it wasn’t a “baby genius” school at all). She didn’t want us to spend the money, either. She decided she could make it work, stay connected with her town peers, and use the money for extracurriculars. We’ll never know if this was the right choice, since you can only do one. </p>

<p>She’s still struggled a lot of the time, but ultimately by any standards she’s made it work (remember: lots of kids envy this GPA), and she knows college is the next opportunity to have a choice. At any rate, she does these things with her eyes wide open, and we have and will put the pros and cons clearly on the table each time. In the end, she’ll have to go with something that seems to have the most advantages for her particular situation. That’s it, I guess.</p>

<p>Good luck with your choice - this is a very difficult question.</p>

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<p>So, are we allowed on this thread? My DD’s gpa is 3.2 I think, weighted, and she does take 3 AP courses but is fighting to maintain B’s in them. One of them is called AP Latin but in bygone days it would simply have been called Latin 4, or “Read The Aeneid.” (AP is the only way you can have 4th yr Latin in our school, and she has 4th yr in her Jr year because we homeschooled her and she started Latin early) </p>

<p>She has “regular” math & science and also struggles to maintain Bs there. I consider her a solid B & B+ student overall. She does get A+ in art & gym.</p>

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<p>Historymom, </p>

<p>To filter in google, put quote marks around the phrase. So put them around “Coastal Carloina” and add univ or college for good measure. With google, you write a few of the words you expect should turn up on the page you are looking for.</p>

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<p>welcome JRZ mom and thank you so very much for the search tip!</p>

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<p>Thanks historymom-- I just realized if you write “coastal carolina” in google you will also get hits for lots of tourist sites & geology & fisheries things. So add words like courses, admissions, and other collegy stuff to eliminate them.</p>

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<p>Shrinkrap, no grief from me either. Very tough decision when, as for most of us, money is a factor. </p>

<p>Believe me, we’ve been asking ourselves whether 50, 40 or even 30 a year is “worth it” for a kid who really seems to want to work with his hands. We’ve answered in the affirmative (although I really hope at the lower end), but I stand totally ready to pull the plug if it looks like things aren’t working right.</p>

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<p>RTR, your first quote from the 2010 parents thread was exactly the one which inspired me to never look at that thread again.</p>

<p>Gweeta, those are 4 excellent options, although I understand your son wishing there were more of a “Wow!” factor instead of a “Where’s that?” factor and your resulting regrets. A year from now, I hope he is feeling great about his choice. It may help him to look at the colleges’ class of 2014 Facebook pages, where most of the kids will be very enthusiastic about going there. If he is willing to post on those pages’ “Walls” about his interests, he may find some kindred spirits–although I have noticed that girls seem 10 times more likely to post than boys–50 times if you exclude "“Hey, any lax players?” type posts–and 100 times more likely to post “I’d like to get to know some people, so please message me.” </p>

<p>And I absolutely agree that the parents on this thread are a great group of people who I wish would move to my town, so my wife and I could meet them (and perhaps in exchange export our town’s many “Only 720! What a nightmare!” parents. </p>

<p>Emmybet, the eloquence of your posts makes me feel I am barely above the “Hey, any parents of lax players?” level.</p>

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<p>Gweeta, here’s a college I would so want to attend – I read about it when we were in Charleston (s goes to CofC.) It sounded just perfect for someone who wanted to be highly skilled in various “building arts” and also wanted a college education. With all the restoration going on in Charleston, it’s a perfect location, too.</p>

<p>[The</a> American College of the Building Arts](<a href=“http://www.buildingartscollege.us/]The”>http://www.buildingartscollege.us/)</p>

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<p>stillnadine, I read a story about ACBA in our (NC) newspaper a year or so ago. It sounded wonderful for someone with those talents and aspirations.</p>

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<p>JRZmom, Of course you are welcome. My son is in this category because although he takes AP and honors classes he’s still a B student as were his brother and sister, both of whom got into college. My daughter ended HS a B+ student, graduated college with high honors and was recently accepted to Vanderbilt as a Grad student.</p>

<p>This High School stuff is just one chapter in their lives and our lives. I’m certainly glad to have some cyber friends to share the adventure.</p>

<p>I think we’re visiting Hartwick in NY this weekend. Anyone else going to their open house? They are known as a good LAC with merit aid for B students!</p>