Starting a thread for new empty nesters who are at the edge peering into the void…
Thanks @shawk for the idea
Starting a thread for new empty nesters who are at the edge peering into the void…
Thanks @shawk for the idea
We are becoming empty nesters 22-Aug when we drop off S24 at UMD.
We are having a hard time deciding where to go next. After Parents weekend we have ZERO formal plans though we’ve talked about getting a beach house for a month, bringing the pooch, and working remotely.
Long term I’d love to do this in Rome or London but maybe not freshman year.
What are your plans?
We’ve been empty nesters for almost 10 years now. The most important advice I received was from @Colorado_mom…establish a weekly FaceTime schedule. We still do that to this day. Thanks for the advice!
We downsized. We have traveled a bunch, but we did that prior to empty nesting too.
I’d caution on the second home unless you plan on being there a lot. We’ve had a cabin, and now we have an apartment overseas. It’s a lot of work.
We’ll be empty nesters after August 19. This fall, we’re going to Italy for 3 weeks - I’ve been there several times but it will be my husband’s first trip there. This trip will be mostly small towns and outdoor adventures as he is very outdoorsy and not a city/museum guy. I’ve been studying Italian since January, am enjoying using my brain in that way and have a feeling I should be doing more of that (learning new things). In December, we’ll go to Australia to meet up with our older kid who’ll be finishing up her fall quarter there, then our whole family will meet up in New Zealand for Christmas and New Year’s. Almost 7 weeks total of travel between now and mid-January. We have vague notions of selling our house and moving to a new place next year, but not sure whether it’s feasible given aging parents nearby who need our support. I’m excited about all the travel, but I also fear it’s a way I’m distracting myself about the great unknown of empty nesting.
I will join in here. We will have an empty house after labor day. 3 boys in college, 2 of them will be OOS, 12+ hours away.
We plan to do a little traveling but the main focus right now is beefing up our investments so my husband can retire in roughly 4 years.
Our daughter moved away over two years ago and our son moved out in December. In a couple of weeks, we are moving to a new house after having been here 20 years. The new house is lovely, but the house I’m in now is very unique and special. It’s going to be sad, but I will enjoy not having so much house to look after.
This is a really hard time in life for many of us. In the last 4 years, my husband and I have lost our parents and (figuratively) our kids. It’s really been just us two since our youngest went to college in 2019, but knowing they aren’t ever going to live with us again is tough.
I think once we are in the new house and have all this hassle behind us, life will be a bit more normal. I absolutely have a lot more grey hair now than I did even a year ago. Just want to give the keys to the new owners of my current house, as sad as it will be.
Joining the thread as well, although I’ve already been chattering about our impending empty nest on the P-24 thread. I think I’m going to get a lot of work done this Fall. Unenthusiastic yay from me. I’m going to try to do work stuff that I enjoy, to remind myself of that part of the job. It’s lucky that we live in a large city, so my spouse and I have plenty of entertainment if we make the effort to go out.
Joining in too. Empty nesting starts on 8/25 for us. Both my girls will be far away but I keep reminding myself that it’s where they should be.
Biggest project to keep me distracted will be figuring out a place to move and cleaning out the house we’ve lived in for 20 years. Both my husband and I are ready to leave the Seattle grey and wet behind (we are having a glorious summer and I will miss those). We have several travel plans for Fall so that will help too. Also counting on all my girlfriends to cheer me up. I do a lot of volunteer work but am contemplating getting back into a paying job.
Preparing myself for a rough few months but hoping it will be better than expected.
Going to really
Miss the day to day of my girls. My oldest has been great at staying in touch. Don’t think my youngest will be quite as good but we have bonded these past 2 years when she’s been the only child at home most of the time.
Adding that our dog will be getting more attention and walks than he’s ever wanted . He is going to miss his girls too.
Can I join? I’ve got a year but it seems so close. We’re excited honestly, I’ve been a stay at home parent and my husband works remotely so we’re considering a move and it’s been fun to start planning to plan We also can’t wait for off school break travel!
That said, I’ve been a stay at home parent and I’ve no idea what comes next.
I completely relate to the stay at home parent and now what feeling. I loved being able to stay home and have no regrets there but would be nice to have a job to keep me busy during this adjustment.
We will be empty nesters too as of 8/29. Planning a short trip near S24s school after and then depending on his music schedule may be visiting more than we ever did with S21. It will be a crazy year with visiting and hoping to throw myself into a major home renovation so we can move out in 5-6 years (ha!)
So jealous. 3 weeks in Italy is great. We have 4 days in Rome coming up but I agree a few weeks are necessary.
Ours was spoiled by working from home. He’d lose it if we had to go back full time
I’d love to sell, move, and downsize but we have a few years left on the mortgage and few years left on the tuition (haha). My S24 also insisted loudly that we keep the house while he is in college so he has someplace to come back.
The other problem is that we cannot decide where to move. I’m at the point where I would literally pay someone to make that decision for us. Feel free to make suggestions.
We’re in an expensive state (NJ) and we know we have to leave. We’ll have two of the three boys in DC and one in Pittsburgh. Heading South is cheaper but also hot and humid. PA tax situation is probably better than NJ in retirement so maybe at least cross the border. Going North will be cooler and more comfortable but farther from the kids. We’ll probably have to see who has kids first.
We have exactly the same issue in the same state. Few more years on the mortgage and can’t figure out where we would go. Smaller house in the same area? One of the suburban cities? Into nyc? All ha e pluses and minuses so for now kids keep their bedrooms and we renovate!
We’re struggling too with where to go. We’re in the PNW and there are many things we love about living here. But my husband’s home office is in Chicago, he’s in Europe several times a year, and our aging parents all live in the Southeast. There’s nothing really holding us here.
I’d rather go somewhere like Montana, which doesn’t make any logistical sense but I think we will wind up in the SE and I’ll have to deal with humidity and no real mountains. I keep hoping maybe a few years in Europe, which would be great.
Yes, the longer trip is a “practice run” living for a week each in 3 different locations. We are struggling a bit on where to move to as well. Our mortgage is paid off, and we think we’ll try living in different places of interest for a few weeks or month at a time as a way to get the feel of different places before deciding where to move to. My husband will most likely work for a few more years and he works remotely so can work from anywhere; I can take leave from my part time job and go back if/when we return from wherever we’ve been. My kids understand we may sell the house they grew up in, and have warmed to the idea of coming “home” to a new place. We live in a HCOL area and would like to downsize in a lower COL area, bonus if it’s not rainy and cloudy for 9 months of the year.
Our last college kid graduated in 22 (in 3 years) and moved out and stayed out, but because of covid and other factors, we had a boomerang situation with our oldest D17/21). The last time she lost her rented house due to a landlord issue, and had just gotten a dog. After she moved out march '23. we decided to sell our house in GA and move to FL, where we are now on the water all the time, and closer to my mom. WE did downsize the house size. DH is still working, but i was laid off in Febuary and decided to just do some part time work for now.
One thing that I remember was how hard it was initially when S19 left (pre covid). That first month was so strange. So you new empty nesters, know that its an adjustment. Also, they do come home during breaks, and can boomerang home after graduation, and other times; it does not have to be where you live now, but just remember this
Our nest empties August 25th.
We’ve been talking about downsizing…while also trying to figure out what timing works best. Trying to decide whether it makes sense to make a big push to downsize asap or take a more leisurely approach to make sure both we and the kids are ready (physically and emotionally) to say goodbye to the last “all of us lived here full-time” home.
Whatever our decision, I am thinking it will be easier to continue decluttering when we don’t have other people constantly bringing more stuff into the house. I’m trying to gently encourage the kids to declutter their rooms before they leave…we will see if progress is made on that front.
A silver lining to pandemic lockdown was finding out that DH and I still really enjoy one another’s company. So, on that front, we are very much looking forward to having time just the two of us. Making dinners based on what just two of us want to eat. Choosing movies to watch without getting committee approval. And paying for only 2 people with whatever other activities catch our eye.