No bid after rushing fraternity's twice

College Life
1

Just finished up rushing for the second time and it was unsuccessful once again. Rush was two weekends, the first being structured time slots of events and the second being unstructured invite only events. I was invited to two houses for all 3 days of invite only, and had to pick which one to go to for the final day of invite only as they were at the same time.

After that night, I received a call informing me that I wouldn’t be invited to bid night from the house I attended. This house I previously rushed in the fall, and after being cut they encouraged me to come back for the next rush cycle. I also received a call from the house I didn’t attend that night, saying they couldn’t bid me since I didn’t attend their last event, but he encouraged me to rush again in the fall.

I am honestly heartbroken as I have been looking forward to joining a fraternity for a while. While I have a decent group of friends and have enjoyed my time in school, the dorms have gotten old and I was looking forward to branching out, pledging, and going to parties.

I have some friends in the house that I didn’t attend on the final day, so I am thinking of rushing there again in the fall. I apparently had an almost guaranteed bid but not showing up eliminated me from bid night consideration. I don’t know if members won’t like me since I didn’t come to their last event but I’m pretty hopeful.

I’m disappointed and this whole experience has also hurt my parents who feel really bad for me (both were in greek life) but I’m trying to keep my head up and remember that everything happens for a reason. Does anyone have experience/advice rushing as a sophomore? I know it will be competitive with all of the first years but I am hoping to give it one last shot.

2

Keep your head up. You don’t need others to validate your worth.

Having great friends is what you can focus on.

You’re still in school with all the great opportunities.

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3

Focus on what you can control, not on what others might think or do.

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4

Oh that sucks for sure. I’m so sorry. Greek recruitment is such an imperfect system --you have to make decisions about which house to go to, and then you get dropped there, but now the other houses you had to drop to go there now can’t give you a bid. Honestly, it’s just kind of a mess, and it definitely results in lots of amazing kids falling through the cracks. Please know it’s not you, and you aren’t alone. Greek life can be a great addition to college life, but the system can be also ruthless in its approach to recruitment.
is it possible to do COB (informal rush)?

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5

I had similar experiences in college. I rushed three times and never landed a bid anywhere. Just like college admissions, you can’t always get what you want, and you have to move on. It sucks, but there isn’t really a way around it.

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6

My school doesn’t do COB but I can technically rush again in the fall. I might rush the house I didn’t attend on the final night as I know a few members but I dont know.

7

Or get your mind off of Greek life and work on making the best of your day to day.

You can have a great experience. You don’t need to be beholden to anything.

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