NYT Article: In College, You Can Go Home Again and Again

[Booklady]

<p><a href=“http://www.nytimes.com/2006/12/14/fashion/thursdaystyles/14nest.html[/url]”>http://www.nytimes.com/2006/12/14/fashion/thursdaystyles/14nest.html&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

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The empty nest isn’t what it used to be or what many parents expected it would be when they left their children at college, driving away while trying to stifle their sobs. With religious and national holidays, family celebrations and the October break, many college students — or at least those within several hours of their old bedrooms — seem to be home almost as much as they’re away. </p>

<p>Now many of them are returning for the holidays, with some having a vacation of a month or more before classes resume.</p>

<p>While much has been made of helicopter parents — those who continue to hover over their children’s lives even when they’re in college — many parents are happy to hear from their children only occasionally, taking it as a sign that they have succeeded in raising healthy adults. But with instant technology, second or third family cars, discount airfares and a college schedule that sometimes seems more Swiss sanitarium than cutthroat Ivy League, parents never know when a child might return…

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[barrons]

<p>This makes me want to vomit.</p>

[HImom]

<p>To me, such frequent contact is “too much of a good thing.” I think about once/week (which is what we’re trying to get our S to do) is a pretty good amount of contact. Daily or multiple times/day seems quite excessive, especially if it’s coupled with frequent visits “home.” It really does make you wonder how & if the students will form deep friendships at their Us. I guess we’re all different, but I think an important part of college is developing your own life & part of that is not constantly checking in with parents & “home.”</p>

[Booklady]

<p>HImom, I agree. My D, who is 3 hours away by train, calls us once a week and sends an e-mail once or twice a week. We’ve seen her twice (Parents’ Weekend and Thanksgiving) and she’ll be home on the 22nd for 3 weeks. While of course we miss her, we know that she’s very happy, working hard, and enjoying all her new friends and activities. Knowing her as I do, if she were calling every day, frankly I’d be worried. But that may not be the case for everyone.</p>

[ellemenope]

<p>I wish mine called once a week…I thought that she must have lost her phone or something…</p>