<p>Kaisers, in N. California at least , have a sort of promise not to sue clause in their contract. i believe you have to settle for arbitration or something like that.</p>
<p>I can’t imagine that the kids would be given to Grandma to take care of for the long term, as foster parent or in any capacity. No one person can do this job, certainly not a 69 year-old. She may be needing help for herself in the near future. These kids each need a reasonably sized family with parents to care for them. If one person is the parent/caregiver for all of them, the place where they live would more closely resemble an orphanage than a home.</p>
<p>If the grandma got custody, by the time the youngest become teenagers, grandma would be 82, and she would have about a dozen teenagers to parent.</p>
<p>Gladmom,
I dont think anyone expects that one person alone can handle the kids, but someone has to be identified as the one who has primary legal/physical/medical decision-making custody/authority, even if only temporarily. Thats where the foster parent or guardian role comes in. It isn’t permanent, it is meant to be temporary, though sometimes the guardians or foster parents file for permanent guardianship of the kids. If grandma is demonstrating better judgement, better decision making, a willlingness to work with the system to arrange for the babies and childrens’ immediate care/needs, the state may deem her a better temporary guardian than anyone else. She seems to have done that with the older 6, so has a track record.</p>
<p>What if one of the babies has an emergency and needs surgery? Someone has to be identified as the one who can authorize it. What if, heaver forbid, one of the kids goes south and soem decisions need to be made about lifesaving or placing the child on a vent, or what have you. The person authorized to make medical decisions would have to sign off on that, and if the kids are temporarily taken from Nadya, since she has shown a dearth of decision-making skills, someone else is appointed to make these difficult decisions.</p>
<p>“anyone else notice that the help from the church she supposedly belonged to hasn’t been heard about or from in a while???”</p>
<p>The church issued a statement that she wasn’t a member, and that all anyone remembers is her checking out the church as possibly a place for her to take her 6 kids. The statement tactfully said that the church is not officially helping, but encouraged caring people to help.</p>
<p>jym, I understand what you are saying. But being that “temporary guardian”, even if she is not involved in physical care of the children, is a tremendous responsibility, and I doubt that grandma can handle it. I wonder just how good a job she has done with the older 6 kids. Just dealing with the autistic boy would be overwhelming, and she has had 5 other kids to do everything for. I’m not saying she hasn’t tried very hard to do a good job, I just wonder how it is possible for her to have been doing even an adequate job of taking care of the 6.</p>
<p>Oh I totally agree, gladmom, but if the choice becomes having the mom (ie grandma) stay involved in the care or oversight of the kids rather than to give that to an outside third party, she may want to do that.</p>
<p>I certainly can understand the grandma wanting to “stay involved in the care or oversight of the kids.” But I wonder if she is up to the job of making all of the many and complicated decisions that will have to be made over the short-term and/or long-term. She is 69 years old, divorced (I think) and decisions will have to be made regarding her life. Where will she live when her current house is no longer available? What are her resources for herself? Depending on health and financial resources, managing life at her age and older can be quite a challenge, even when there are no other responsibilities.</p>
<p>We are purely conjecturing here. Might as well wait to see what the grandma does/says. I do have to admit, though, that if we are worried about a 69 yr old woman overseeing the management of 6 kids, I for one am glad a 72 old man wasnt elected president of the US ;)</p>
<p>Gee . . . . if something should happen to Grandma over the next several years, I’m sure Nadya could step right up to the plate and help her out . . . :rolleyes:</p>
<p>I just watched her on Dr. Phil again. She JUST DOESN’T GET IT!</p>
<p>I was amazed at how she constantly interrupts, talks continuously over Dr. Phil, basically tries to verbally roll over everyone in the room. Part of being a good parent is being a good listener. I really feel sorry for these kids if she is allowed to take them all home.</p>
<p>I haven’t seen the Dr. Phil interviews, but I did notice that style in earlier interviews. I think that this woman is missing the capacity for guilt. She is able to sound assured about anything, even whens spouting nonsense. Example: I have never taken welfare, and if I did, it was only temporary.</p>
<p>I watched both Dr. Phil shows (and I rarely watch TV but this thread hooked me in). She comes across as unrealistic, in denial, and immature. By the end, Phil got her to admit that her decision to even have ONE more baby (her plan when having six embryos implanted this most recent time) was wrong, since she couldn’t even support the six kids she already has. I couldn’t tell if he just really pushed her to admit it since he maintains (rightfully so) that the public is not supportive of her…both her actions and her attitude about it all and that in order to receive any sympathy or any help at all from people (which she sorely needs for the KIDS’ sake…Phil’s objective), that she would have to finally admit her poor judgement. So, I don’t know if she came to the realization that she was wrong or if he basically persuaded her to admit to her inappropriate decisions. I felt really badly for the grandma. However, she seemed pleased that an outsider (Phil) was talking some sense into Nadya and saying what she has been trying to get across to Nadya for a long while. Referring to Phil at the end of the show, the grandma turns to Nadya and says, “I told you he was good.” I am pretty amazed that Nadya has no concrete plans in place considering she has known she would have mulitples for a while and also they were born several weeks ago. She is in la la land.</p>
<p>Soozievt, I agree. Dr. Phil also made a wonderful statement – and maybe he’s used it before, but I don’t watch him: He said that it doesn’t matter whether Nadya’s decision was the right decision; the issue now is to “make the decision right.” In other words, to take the bed she’s made for herself and figure out how to handle it. I thought it was a great, pithy way of saying what the reality is.</p>
<p>Too bad that Nadya, by herself, can’t “make the decision right.” She is unable, at this point, to do anything herself, because she has no resources. She is completely dependent on the kindness of others (those who would donate their time, items or money) or on the legal actions of officials to make it right.</p>
<p>I was searching google for some info about her. I don’t even know what network Dr Phil is on or when he is on. I did find her website where one can donate or make comments. I would imagine the comments left for her would be less than flattering and wonder who, if anyone is sending donations</p>
<p>I never watch Dr. Phil either. He mentioned at the end of the broadcast something about setting up a page on his site for donations for Nadya (her kids) too.</p>
<p>Here’s what I found interesting…Dr. Phil asked for the viewers not to punish the babies, and he was going to have a link if you wanted to donate…yet, he did not state if his charity was donating to her. I have seen many episodes where his foundation gives money, so I question did he give her money? If so, why didn’t he announce it…maybe out of fear that the public would backlash on him or because he himself felt that she was not trustworthy to donate to her!</p>
<p>There are over 1500 posts on his web…I only saw one woman (midwest was her moniker) that supported Nadya, everybody else seemed to have the same opinions as this board does…immature, selfish, in denial and incapable of raising 14 children, which many will be sspecial needs.</p>
<p>At the end of the show he said he had just received a fax from her that showed everything the hospital demanded before releasing the babies…Nadya supposedly said that reality is finally hitting her because the nurses had been taking care of the babies and now it is up to her. Even Dr. Phil said you had 7 months to prepare and you did nothing, didn’t even buy a car seat or cribs…CAN WE ALL SAY SHE THOUGHT DONATIONS WOULD DO THAT! I am sure she thought that she would be like the Dillons, McCaugheys and Gosselins with people donating cars, baby supplies, etc…now reality is hitting her that she will go through 10K diapers and nobody came up to the plate.</p>
<p>Just read this on line
[Usmagazine.com</a> | News - Octo Grandmother “Opts” for Adoption if Daughter Can’t Afford Babies](<a href=“http://www.usmagazine.com/news/octomom-grandmother-put-babies-up-for-adoption-if-cant-afford-2009262]Usmagazine.com”>http://www.usmagazine.com/news/octomom-grandmother-put-babies-up-for-adoption-if-cant-afford-2009262)</p>
<p>"Angela Suleman – grandmother to the infamous octuplets – says she wouldn’t be against her daughter, Nadya, putting the babies up for adoption if she can’t afford them.</p>
<p>“It’s very hard to say because they are my grandchildren. However, if I could know the future…if I could see that she would not be able to take of them financially…I would opt for this,” she says in an interview with The Insider that airs tonight."</p>
<p>I think it would be good for the babies if they were adopted by several loving families who could give them the love and care they need.</p>
<p>I noticed on Dr. Phil, it came up that Nadya had asked her mom to babysit one day when she went to see the octoplets at the hospital and her mom said, “no”, and Nadya had to find someone else. I think the grandma is in a tough position and has to assert herself because otherwise, her entire life is gonna be taking care of these kids full time. It struck me how old the grandma looked given she is in her lower sixties. I really feel for her.</p>