<p>A fool and money are soon parted. I agree with Soozievt. The money is only a part of the problem. Even families that are well to do often have problem managing kids, finances, schedules, problems. With that many kids, the problems increase exponentially. Add in octuplets born early, and I don’t know who would easily be able to handle a family like that.</p>
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I heard (from a retired school teacher with contacts) that the older children are going to a public school in east Whittier.</p>
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<p>True, cpt. Even if this woman had all of her marbles, which she doesn’t, it would be inordinately difficult.</p>
<p>I know families with twins that were very organized, efficient, as prepared as any for the babies, but were overwhelmed with the double play. I have helped my neighbor who has a set of twins, and they are quite a handful. I had 5 kids but they were spread out enough that I did not have two babies at a time.</p>
<p>Ellemenope…that is what is extraordinary in this case. I don’t think ANYONE could easily handle this situation. ANYONE would need lots of help. It is simply exaccerbated by what appears to be some emotional and mental instability of this young woman and also she doesn’t seem that realistic and makes it seem like not that big of a deal. The fact that she even considered having ONE more child on top of her brood in her current situation shows lack of reality. So, even under the BEST of circumstances, this situation would be extremely difficult but in her case, it is way worse. Like others have said, a train wreck.</p>
<p>There is a reason day care centers are required to have a certain ratio of caregivers to babies/children. Not sure what it is, but it isn’t 1 to 14! </p>
<p>Esp. if some are special needs/premies.</p>
<p>When I was in college, I worked one summer in infant day care at Harvard Business School. I think we had 3 to 1 or 4 to 1. There are strict rules about this in child care. The thing is, there are no rules as to how many kids you can give birth to and raise in one home! :rolleyes:</p>
<p>When they are really young, I think you need one adult to 2 children so they can be evacuated in case of fire.</p>
<p>“it would be inordinately difficult.”</p>
<p>I agree with soozie on this…it’s not difficult, it’s physically impossible. No single human being can care for eight newborns. It would take a superhero even to meet their bare physical needs, and we know from sad experience in this world that infants need a lot more than food, shelter, and clean diapers to grow up healthy.</p>
<p>Hanna, I read your post and had a flashback to those Russian orphanages where the kids had so many psych problems from lack of attention/bonding due to the high ratio of kids vs caregivers! Yikes! I googled for the current status of the Angels offer, but only came up with this:</p>
<p>Baby brand Custom Kingdom has reached out to Octo-Mom Nadya Suleman – who has no job and supports her family on food stamps – to donate clothing for all 14 of her children. “We understand the financial strain one child can put on a family, let alone 14 little ones, so we would like to do our part and donate clothing from our line,” the company says in a letter released to Usmagazine.com. </p>
<p>This company is offering $500 in clothing every month for a year, longer if necessary. Hope the diaper manufacturers jump in as well!</p>
<p>After her kids grow up, it will be interesting to see if any want to have any kids. I wouldn’t be surprised if all or most of her kids decide to pass on becoming parents.</p>
<p>I know it is ridiculous to understand any of Nadya’s “reasoning” as it is out of whack, but an odd thing is how she claims she wanted lots of children to make up for what was lacking for her as an only child but…if she thought things were lacking for just ONE child, how does she expect to be able to give the opposite in terms of that kind of attention when she has 14? Nobody could adequately devote that sort of indivdualized attention to each one that is truly needed in a parent/child relationship. She is not offering her kids somthing “better” than she had, in other words. That kind of thinking is warped. Or else she is acquiring children to make up for her own loneliness and thus as good 'ole Dr. Phil would say, then the children came into the world with a “job” to fill. </p>
<p>Even if Nadya was the most rational and sane parent on earth, it would be impossible to care for that many children 24/7, particularly when 8 are preemies at one time. Even if she had tons of money, it would be physically impossible to handle all of it. There needs to be multiple care givers. Just think of one aspect only…sleep…most new moms will tell ya that there ain’t a lot of that to be had…imagine all these kids waking at night for a feeding…just that alone is mind boggling. Doing their laundry is a part time job in itself. Does she really think she is going to be able to go food shopping? Just bringing one kid along ot the store is a pain. Preparing meals would take more than one person. Diaper changes? I can’t even imagine. Bedtime stories? Come on. Baths? It would take all day to give 14 baths and she only has one in the first place. Add in a kid with autism. Just that kid alone is a full time job. Nobody could handle this alone. And that is even under the BEST of circumstances. And this woman is obviously not capable of organizing a set up for the help and a plan to enact all of it. She had nothing in place by the time of the birth…be it housing, cribs, child helpers, resources, etc. lined up. I noticed on Dr. Phil that she admitted (seemed so immature to me) that it is only hitting her now that some babies may be about to come home. Hello? The reality of what she has to deal with should have hit her when she heard 7 embryos took hold. For that matter, the reality of having six kids in her situation should have made her decide against adding more, particularly at this time. She said the frozen embryos were “there” but what was the rush? Well, it likely makes no sense to ask rational questions of someone who is anything but.</p>
<p>“orphanages where the kids had so many psych problems”</p>
<p>That’s exactly what was going through my mind. Some orphanages had props to hold the bottles so that the babies could eat, enough cribs, clothes, etc. And the babies withered from despair because they didn’t have adults showing them love. It was one of the saddest things I’ve ever seen in my life; it doesn’t bear thinking about.</p>
<p>^^^ I think you guys might be referring to failure to thrive.</p>
<p>Interestingly, it’s also a condition we see often in hospice, with senior citizens. They become so withdrawn (for a variety of reasons), and regressively start to shut down until they are no longer eating anymore, or have any will to live (but are not suicidal).</p>
<p>The other issue for adopted kids from orphanages where they were not sufficiently stimulated by adults is reactive attachment disorder. [Reactive</a> attachment disorder - MayoClinic.com](<a href=“http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/reactive-attachment-disorder/DS00988]Reactive”>Reactive attachment disorder - Symptoms & causes - Mayo Clinic)</p>
<p>If Nadya belly-aches that she had a dysfunctional, solitary upbringing, sadly, without adequate adult stimulation, she is running the risk of doing that to her kids as well.</p>
<p>I find it interesting that Nadya’s mother has sacrificed a lot to take care of Nadya’s children, but Nadya keeps slamming her parents for her own upbringing. I don’t understand – if her parents’ care wasn’t good enough for Nadya, why is it good enough for her 14 children?</p>
<p>Oh, never mind. There’s so much I don’t understand . . . . .</p>
<p>^^^ Oh there you go, trying to be logical again, VH. 
This case defies logic…</p>
<p>As I like to say, we can’t rationalize irrational thinking…</p>
<p>Also, very early on in this case, Nadya, when asked publicly how she would care for so many kids, replied that she is going to love them and hold them. For starters, while love is important, it is not enough to raise a child. Secondly, how does she expect to even “hold” them literally or figuratively as one person managing 14 kids? It is impossible to give each that kind of attention, and particularly when so many are the same age or infants at one time? </p>
<p>We are all trying to rationalize, which as jym says, it impossible because none of her situation reflects rational thinking. </p>
<p>VeryHappy…yes, it is hard to believe she trashes her own upbrining but by the same token, allows her mom to care for the kids to this degree. She also thought she was deprived and had a dysfunctional family when she was an only child and i have no clue how someone would think HER kids will have it BETTER than that. Her thinking is so warped. I don’t mind if she gets to keep her kids but there surely needs to be someone overseeing the upbringing…social services or a guardian ad litem. I think even a rational mom could not handle 14 but Nadya is in way more trouble in being capable of this.</p>
<p>With the birth of my first child, I recall feeling so overwhelmed that I couldn’t imagine having twins. The lack of sleep and even having the time to take a shower took it’s toll , though it was temporary. I would think that the 6 she already had before would take a lot of time to care for, particularly the three with special needs. What made her think she could take on more ?</p>
<p>She is nuttier than a fruitcake-- and that is my professional opinion :D</p>