“The students who were accepted had to really catch a reader’s eye with each component of their applications” is crap! I have a freind who is a professor and graduated from Princeton and dated with a admission officer in Princeton. He knows all about the process and warned us about the anti-Asia -Chinese Boy is the worst so we expected it. A Chinese girl at my son’s school was accepted by MIT, Standford , princeton and Chicago. Her stats is similar with my son. Leadership and EC s are not good as my son. Just tired of some people think they are so unique because they are accepted and dont even have the courage to admit the race ,sex discrimination, which is obviously truth. Hooks are very important-we all agree on it. Hooks definitely stand for discrimination and unfair. so the process is crapshoot. I agree my son will be very successful regardless. I am just surprised at those “not very smart” arguments about the process on CC so I can’t help speaking up a little. I won’t post anything anymore because it’s really pointless. Good luck to everyone
Man, you need to move on… Like we have said- you don’t know the entire application of that girl that was accepted. It’s not a stats driven process only. It’s holistic and there are a lot of moving parts. According to the way you look at things applications should only be considered in a very narrow way.
Wish your S the best. And go take a long walk, pet your dog or cuddle with your cat or get a massage. Life goes on.
@cdlyw As a parent, I understand your anger, pain and frustration. I would feel the same way, if I felt my kid was treated unfairly. It is natural for a parent to feel that way.
I am not sure I can say anything to lessen your anguish, but let me make an attempt.
The admissions process is quite unpredictable. Sometimes deserving students are left out or ignored. And yes, since the decisions are made by humans, they bring their biases and pre-conceived notions about certain groups into their reading of the applications. Universities also have institutional priorities that collide with individual student interests. This means they have to balance the class out for diversity and this puts over represented groups in the admissions pool at a disadvantage, unfairly in their eyes.
Also Remember that at most maybe five or eight people at the University decide the fate of a student. In most cases, it is the first one or two who read the file and they typically read it in less than fifteen minutes. Such a process doesn’t always lend itself to impeccable quality. They are really making a decision on the file, not the student. So when my son got rejected at a university, I just shrugged it off as Maybe 2 or 3 people at this particular school, could not see his promise, instead of interpreting it as ** This university is telling me and my family, that my son is not good enough for their incoming class**
Unfortunately it is harder for Asian students to stand out with their academics and EC’s because many Asians have high scores and great but similar EC’s. I also suspect that poor representation of Asians on the undergraduate admissions committee also makes a difference on how Asian apps are viewed. Clearly a number of Asians must feel the way you do, because there is now a law suit that some of these schools actively put a cap on the number of Asians they enroll. We will have to wait and see if they are able to prove that case it court.
Even if there is no active discrimination going on, it may be harder to get in as an Asian because students are often compared with other students in a pool(same state, same school etc) and it’s not clear if applicants of the same race are being put in the same pool for comparison. If they are, then it raises the bar on Asians applicants even higher.
Finally, don’t get mad that you are not getting a sympathetic ear here on CC forums. You are not the first one to get judged and told “just suck it up and move on” for expressing your anguish. It happens to other people as well 
After reading a lot of threads on CC, it just looks like the “anguished Asian parent” does not get a lot of sympathy here on CC. So you are not being singled out!!
Good luck with your child. I am sure he will do well where ever he goes. We were not lucky to have him, Our loss is some other schools gain.
I have very dear friends who are Asian. Their two boys- CS majors, orchestra members with high SAT scores did not get into their reaches. Sure, they were upset. Yes, they think it’s most likely because the kids are typical nerdy Asian boys. But they are not bitter and not telling people that other kids are less than their kid and did not deserve to have gotten into a school. That’s when bitterness comes in and it’s just not productive. Don’t you think that their kid notices what kind of attitude a parent takes and how they handle it? And if a parent is venting here believe me they are venting at home and at school. Unless the thread says that they just need to vent here so as to not vent elsewhere.
People are responding because OP is also being very judgemental. Imagine being the parent of the girl who got accepted to MIT, Stanford, Princeton and Chicago. And it coming back to them that your kid didn’t deserve it. Not OK.
I hear you, but this is human nature. We get frustrated when things don’t go our way. And yes kids notice. A blue collar white kid who’s Dad gets laid off because his job gets shipped off overseas, notices and hears things, because his Dad is venting and bitter. A minority kid notices when his parents express fear for their safety and express bitterness about police brutality and profiling.
Why judge or sanction a parent for venting about admissions? This process is stressful as it is. Venting is good therapy, specially since it is usually anonymous venting 
I sometimes feel that certain kinds of venting is tolerated and even empathized on CC, others not quite as much.
I would actually recommend CC create a “Venting category” for all kinds of venting. Everybody can go there and vent! Better to get it out of your system.
Perfectly OK in my books. I fully expect some parents and kids at my son’s school to question whether he deserved to get into the schools he did. That is human nature. I expect them to grumble and tell others. I expect them to find subtle ways to undermine his achievements or pass some snide remarks about the schools he got accepted into (this has actually happened). That’s how people deal with the pain of rejection. They can’t just admit, well “That kid was just better than my munchkin”. Oh No! That can’t be.
Maybe it is just me, but I am perfectly fine admitting that “Yeah, your kid deserved to get into this school more than my kid did, but what can you do, sometimes life isn’t fair” It may actually make the other parent feel much better and wouldn’t cost me much, while reminding me and my child that tomorrow the shoe might be on the other foot!
Maybe what the families need to understand is how the process works instead of even thinking that the other kid is better. I watched a video recently and it was interesting to see how admissions people look at applicants. All the parts count. And no one is in the room when they look at your kids application to tell you why it was accepted or not. People that don’t bother to research the process then get righteously indignant about it. While its human nature, it’s not cool to go around dissing kids. Get your act together and act mature. I have been the shoulder to cry on for some parents whose kids were vying for some pretty selective places so can empathize. I just don’t condone the dissing the kids that did get in.
I had just been reading updates on here for the last month and a half without the need to register for an account. Today, I felt that I needed to voice my opinion and support what @goingnutsmom mom posted today. Although I somewhat agree with @VeryLuckyParent that venting is ok and expected in that kind of scenario. What I don’t agree about is dissing another child, like what @goingnutsmom stated. It was rude and disrespectful to tell a kid that they didn’t deserve to get accepted at such a prestigious school more than her child, whom is perfect. I am Asian American and I felt embarrassed and disgusted for what she said. I thought NotVerySmart handled himself very well.
Yeah, that would be rude, but I don’t think anybody did that as far I can tell. I think one of the posters was just voicing his/her opinion about another kid here without any personally identifiable information.
That qualifies as venting, not really malicious behavior in my book
Also IMHO, I think there are objective ways to tell if one child is better qualified academically than another child, just as there are objective ways to tell if one child is a better runner or a better basketball or football player.
I think what frustrates a lot of Asian parents is that having come from countries where University admissions is essentially an academic ranking and stacking exercise, they cannot fathom how objectively better academically prepared students are denied admission when objectively less well prepared students are accepted, because this would rarely happen in their native countries unless the other student used influence to get in.
What they fail to appreciate emotionally, till they actually go thru the process is that American Universities don’t simply evaluate a student academically, there are other equally if not more important “soft factors” that go into the evaluation. They may understand this at an intellectual level, but only when you experience it personally do you really get it.
The challenge is that these soft factors don’t lend themselves to “objective evaluation”. One person’s better is another person’s worse and hence there is a lot of grumbling with admission decisions, specially from folks who don’t get their choices in the admissions race.
I know it is easy to express righteous anger and dismay when such parents grumble, specially when you or your kids have won the admissions lotto or you feel the system worked well for you. I guess I am asking for a little less anger and a little more empathy. A lot of parents and kids are hurting right now.
Well, they told Not Very Smart that it’s no wonder UChicago took them since he is true to his moniker when they were trying to reason with them.
And it’s not just the Asian parents. I had one Anglo mom who told me how she and her daughter just couldn’t believe that Rice took such an obviously intellectually inferior girl in the neighborhood over her. And she saw nothing wrong with spouting these comments to people who knew the other girl and her family. Her D had stellar stats no doubt. She applied to very highly selective schools and some Ivies and got into zero of them. If her essays and recommendations hinted at her attitude, then that’s probably what hindered her applications. She’s at the state flagship. This isn’t the only story that I’ve come across though. I think we need to take a step back and really realize what’s at stake here. Sure, I want my kids to go to a great school. But what I really want for them is to grow into kind human beings.
This college admissions process can bring out the best in us or the worst in us. And it’s our choice.
I agree with @goingnutsmom that although college admissions is a tough process, it is unfair to assume that accepted students are undeserving. Furthermore, many parents/students on CC have vented about other people who have gotten into top-tier schools with sub-par test scores, extracurricular activities, leadership, etc. However, many students who are accepted by elite institutions do not feel the need to advertise all of their extracurricular activities. For example, one of my friends is an excellent student with great test scores, but she is also a talented musician and Julliard student (something that very few people know about).
Is there an element of luck in the college admissions process? Yes - but it is not a total crapshoot. Personally, I am grateful to be accepted by Chicago, but I was rejected by a few other top schools, including my first choice. I have no doubt that the students accepted by those schools were beyond qualified in all respects.
My daughter is waitlisted at Chicago. I saw only one getting out of the waitlist in the last couple of days in this forum. Look forward to some news on chances after this…best wishes to those who made it…
Is it too late to send in a letter saying that your interested in a gap year?
Does anyone think that they will take more people of the waitlist, or are they mostly finished by now?
I’m waiting for the yield % to come out soon, which will give us a better sense of whether they’ll be taking people off…or close the waitlist…
I guess they would probably take just a few more students, and these selections would be by far, the most scrutinized ones, as they would prefer to choose carefully for the last few seats. As an international student, with a huge aid requirement, and a SAT score in which my Reading (also Writing, but Chicago probably doesn’t consider that afaik) weren’t the best (although not too bad either, and my SAT subject tests were both 800s, in Physics and Math II ), I know my selection would be no short of a miracle, but I do wish the others the best of luck.
It seems this year wouldn’t be the one when I can come to the United States for my college education (I got mostly rejections a couple of waitlists, and the only acceptances were from state colleges that don’t give aid to internationals :)) ), but I would certainly apply for a transfer.
From the previous discussion, although I agree that this admission process, by its subjective nature has helped me in understanding myself better, I would certainly have preferred if I could understand where I went wrong. It is not that I am the best student around; there are hundreds of people better than me out there, and maybe I am more acquainted with objective methods of judging students, but still, I wish the admission process was more easier to understand from the perspective of a student. I guess this is what causes some parents to react in an undesirable manner; the “not knowing” factor bringing out their negative emotions to the forefront.
Nevertheless, I hope we all hear of a few more acceptances in the coming few days, as the entire community of CC has been waiting nervously for far too long. Best of luck, all!
I just emailed again and recoeved a more personal response!
When the yield % to come out ?too much waiting.
@cdlyw You are being overly dramatic. Yes, there’s discrimination to some extent, but you are just exaggerating way too much. I’m Chines AND I’m international, which means that I come from one of the most competitive pools in the world, so I feel like I have some say in this. Against all odds I got off the waitlist just fine, extremely early in the process as well. There are a few kids at my school (predominantly white) with better stats, but I’m 100% confident that I deserve this spot. I understand that you are angry, but don’t you find it ridiculous that you are mad because your son is “only” going to Berkeley? I mean, come on.
@cdlyw I totally agree with you. My son’s situation is very similar to your son’s. My son GPA ranks No.1 (weighted 5.560, valedictorian), and took 15 AP Classes with all As except one B. His ACT got 35 for one shot. He has lots of ECs. But he didn’t get any offer from Ivy schools except some waiting list. It seems that the system is unfair to Asian boys. His classmates, ranking No. 7 (African American girl) and No. 8 (first generation) all got Harvard, MIT, etc… I told my son that unfortunately you were born to Chinese parents. But luckily he got a state college acceptance with full scholarship + a president scholarship. We ever put great expectation to him since he is so smart in academy. But life will move on. Best wishes to your son and to my son.
Oh Boy!! Now you’ve really done it!! Get ready! You will always remember your memorable first post on CC
Congrats on your son’s achievement BTW. He must have worked really hard.
Regardless you admit or not, do you think the system is fair? http://www.slate.com/articles/news_and_politics/politics/2015/06/fisher_v_university_of_texas_the_supreme_court_might_just_gut_affirmative.html