“Ha, I know, right? Really tough. Good thing for us Great Uncle Clayton came through, eh? Well, off I go. Good talking to you.”
OK, maybe one of the ones mentioned above might work better… 
@Midwest67 - I don’t think she is necessarily under pressure. I think she’s just trying to do better at her job. She freely admitted that she had no specific training in the area of college admissions. @MusakParent - I wouldn’t call it an “elite” high school. It’s a K-12 Christian school with a good reputation, and they do sometimes place kids in Ivies. But, tuition is $10,000 per year. She is the GC for grades 7-12, so has more responsibilities than just college admissions advising. Between 50 and 70 kids per grade. There is a more elite high school in our area ($25,000 per year) with about the same number of students per grade that has a dedicated college admissions staff of three people.
Along those lines, how about, “Well, our $10 million donation might have had some influence.” Then just smile.
I double dog dare you. There are all kinds of ways you could have fun with this. If nothing else, it’ll get tongues wagging in town.
@doschicos - I love this!!! What a great response to deflect. I think I’ll take that dare the next time I get questioned like this.
I feel like I have a pretty good radar on this sort of questioning. I think I’m pretty good at picking up on where it is coming from. She was kind of a blend of the two.
"Oh, he got rejected but he rejected the rejection and showed up anyway. Shhh, Nobody’s figured it out yet "
Or
“They reject everybody, but the people they really want like my son don’t take no for an answer and show up anyway.”
With all other factors considered it does take some luck to get into top schools. For every student admitted there were few with exactly same stats who were not.
„I could tell you, but then I’d have to kill you…“
I love the name dropping on a thread about odd parent queries. “They must have seen him as a good fit is all I can guess” is a simple answer.
Don’t be friends with people who make rude comments like that.
Since my pups were accepted, when asked what the difference in getting accepted vs getting rejected is, I like to say “it’s because the tippy top schools know the kids whose parents loved them more.”
I once told a couple of snotty parents that asked about why D got into Stanford when nobody else from our HS ever did - “Oh, I’m sure it must have had something to do with her great essay about the patent she filed for curing cancer”
I’m not sure what the alternative would be. “No, it’s not a lottery; my kid is just better than yours”? If you really wanted to avoid these conversations you could always be vague about which college your son attends, but if you’re going to engage in them why not just give them general info. from the Common Data Set? That would probably be more helpful than one kid’s record anyway. Then you can ask them about their kids. The GC is better off contacting schools to get an idea what their students may be lacking. I don’t think polling random parents will be much help.
S attended a very selective magnet HS and I was asked several times what the “secret” to acceptance was. My response was if I had that information I would sell it and quit my job.
I would just shrug and say “I really don’t know.” That’s the humble answer, and it’s also the truth.
Years ago, my D was rejected from the school your D attends, but D’s classmate got in. They were both legacies, the other girl’s GPA was slightly higher (they were val and sal); my D’s SAT scores were higher; both were sports team captains, musicians, etc.
Was the other girl’s application really that much better? Who knows? Both were certainly well qualified for admission. Maybe S could only take one kid from such a tiny school. Maybe they wanted a cellist instead of a pianist? Maybe they liked lacrosse better than cross country that year, even though neither was qualified for S’s teams. Maybe the admissions rep who interviewed them liked one better, even though an interview wasn’t required. It’s not always possible to know why one kid is chosen over another.
I used to just say “Yes, my daughter was very fortunate.” and then move the conversation in another direction.
It’s funny – That is a question I never asked. In every case of a classmate or peer who was accepted at a college that didn’t accept one of my kids, my child generally knew exactly why, and often I did, too, or my child told me. There wasn’t any case where I was thinking “How can that have happened?” That doesn’t mean that there was always clear superiority, although usually there was in one or more important respects. When there wasn’t clear superiority, there was always something special that a rational admissions committee could value, and could choose over the special qualities my child had if it were a head-to-head contest (which in some cases it might have been, and in others not).
“You can’t cure stupid…or rude.”
I would have said something along the lines of “You think so?? Then I guess they hit the jackpot when they got my son” and walked away.
I also like the “sell the information and quit my job” line.
The GC was seated at our table for the dinner, so there was no escaping. She was really a lovely person, but woefully uninformed for someone who has been in her job for twelve years!
It wasn’t a huge deal to me, but it’s happened a few times over the years. In a couple of months, it won’t come up anymore!
Since you were talking to a guidance counselor, I’d probably be more forthcoming than just any old parent. You can never know for sure, but you can list the stuff that might have made a difference. Obviously something caught their eye.
I guess the answer is “I guess they just saw something in my son that they didn’t see in yours!!!”
Don’t you wish you could actually say it?
We’ve been getting the “your daughter only got in because she’s a girl going into engineering”. Yep, she is a girl. Yep, it’s a hook. I just hate the implication that she is somewhat less qualified because of it when she has worked her tail off and more than earned her way.