Ok to Move Out??

<p>Hey Everyone! Just joined today, this is my first post!</p>

<p>Daughter shares a house with 3 other college girls. It is her first rental (in her name, not ours) which she shares jointly (lease) with the other 3. At present time she is "miserable" living with the 3. Personality conflicts, lack of communication, expectations, etc. She wants to move out - break her lease and move in with her best friend (with whom she practically lives with now, except for her furniture etc). </p>

<p>We pay her rent, and we paid the security deposit (which she/we will lose and she will owe us, should she move out), she pays for her share of electric, cable, food, etc. We have explained how irresponsible it is to break a lease, how she can be sued, wages garnished, credit ruined, etc. D says she knows a lot of people who have broken their lease, which I don't doubt at college age, but there's a huge risk in doing so. I've suggested she have her roommates sign a roommate release form - releasing her from liability - if the roommates would agree to do so. I don't think they will, but who knows. However, D is still set on moving out regardless.</p>

<p>I know living with people you don't get along with can be extremely stressful and unpleasant. However, I think she should "woman up" and deal with it until the lease is up (this summer). </p>

<p>I feel like refusing to pay her rent if she moves elsewhere. Seeing that she adhere to her responsibility and thus preventing a train wreck (bad credit, etc). Should I resort to such a tactic? Or just let her live and learn? She IS an adult now. Thanks for your thoughts on the subject!</p>

<p>Well, I don’t know what the “right” answer is, but I’d sure be annoyed to be a parent on the other end of this, having to make up a rent/utilities difference because one of the other students broke the lease.</p>

<p>If she was in danger, or tolerating significant abuse of some kind, I might see mitigating circumstances. I had an intolerable roommate situation and moved out, but it was a dorm room and my roommate was not left with any additional expenses, nor did I have to pay anything extra to do so as I just switched dorms.</p>



<p>I would not finance my son’s unethical behavior. </p>

<p>If I were the parent of one of the roommates, I’d tell them to not sign anything. </p>

<p>Your daughter needs to look up her rights and responsibilities. Then she needs to deal with the consequences. The idea that you’ll keep paying rent no matter the chaos she leaves in her wake is surely not what you meant when you offered to do such a generous thing for her. It sounds like it’s time to set some boundaries.</p>

<p>It is hard to get out of a lease. Usually, to break a lease, there needs to be some huge problems with the landlord. </p>

<p>Her best bet would be to find someone to sublet, or preferably to take over her part of the lease. Has she asked her current roommates about whether they know people who need housing? </p>

<p>Frankly, this is the time of year to do it as there are likely people coming back from semesters abroad and maybe even new students starting for Spring.</p>

<p>I think you are overstating the risks (" how she can be sued, wages garnished, credit ruined, etc."). College students as a whole are not the most reliable, stable tenants, and most are poor. Landlords know this and are unlikely to waste time and money chasing after a college student when they won’t have any money to pay a judgment anyway. In particular, few if any report payment history to the credit agencies. She might get a poor reference from this landlord if she ever chose to list them, but she won’t since she broke the lease.</p>

<p>Not to say it won’t happen, but the odds are low IMO. </p>

<p>How is the lease written? Is each girl responsible for 1/4 of the rent, or are they all each responsible for the entire rent?</p>

<p>I think probably the best solution is to have your D find a replacement for herself. The remaining three will also be motivated to find another roommate so that they aren’t (most likely, depending on the lease) stuck for the extra rent. And it sounds like they may be glad to have your D gone, so they may not oppose her moving out that much.</p>

<p>How much money are we talking about here?</p>

<p>They are all responsible for the entire rent. She spoke with the landlord who also suggested the roommate release and finding a replacement, and there wouldn’t be a problem. The thing is, her bedroom is the smallest and not worth what she pays in rent compared to the others (she got the shaft). So, if she found someone, the others would have to pick up more of the rent, no doubt. </p>

<p>Again, I don’t think she wants to mess with any of that. She just wants to leave. And by lawsuit, I’m talking about the other parents suing for her share of the rent that THEY would no doubt have to incur (not the girls) if a replacement was not found (should she bother).</p>

<p>Has she talked to her roommates yet? If your D has problems with them, chances are they have problems with her and will be glad to see her go.</p>

<p>How much is the rent?</p>

<p>Is your name on the lease as a guarantor? If so, be very careful before risking your credit.</p>

<p>Can she find some one to take her place? If so, be sure to get a lease substitution. One of my DDs had a horrid roommate situation and we allowed the roommates remaining behind to choose the substitute, but we insisted the lease be updated and that the new person repay DDs security deposit.</p>

<p>In one apartment that worked, and we later heard the kids left behind lost their entire deposit (4 figures) in another situation we could not find a substitute and we actually ended up paying a couple of months rent despite DD not being in the unit.</p>

<p>She may want to just leave, but that is not being a grown up, a grown up deals with the consequences of their choices and learns from it. I would (and have) hold her to the responsibility of finding a new renter, even if that means the rent is agreed by all to be lower for that room.</p>

<p>Unless this is safety related, at a minimum she should be on the hook for any associated costs with breaking the lease which usually involves the security deposit, possibly the last month’s rent if paid up front, and 30 days of rent/utilities from the time she gives the roomies notice regardless of whether she moves out immediately or not, and any other cancellation and early termination charges. From your end it means you have no more costs than you have had otherwise. </p>

<p>The other issue is the ethical one of leaving her roomies high and dry due to the ‘promise’ of being a roomie for the year being broken. This, as well as the costs above, can sometimes be mitigated by your D actively securing an acceptable roomie for them to assume the lease.</p>

<p>About a month ago, my daughter saw a peeping tom at her window in the middle of night. She wanted to move out right then and there, and I didn´t blame her. But instead of acting on an impulse, she went to talk to her landlord to try to get better security. When she still didn´t feel sufficiently safe, she and her roommate went to look for another apartment. They found a great apartment (for $200 more per month), and subletted their apartment to 2 guys. They got their deposit back and signed a new lease. </p>

<p>It would not cross D1´s mind to break her lease or her obligation to her roommates. I would not support my daughter in breaking the lease if I was paying for the rent. College experience is more than just about academic, it´s also a time for them to learn how to behave as responsible adults, with a big safety net beneath them. Just because some people believe</p>



<p>doesn´t mean your kid needs to behave as such.</p>

<p>My kid would be paying any expense involved with it. If she got the shaft on room size, that was her choice. She picked these kids to live with, maybe she will have better judgement next time. I absolutely would not approve of her “just leaving”. This is a lesson she needs to learn – she made an adult decision and signed a lease, and has to live with keeping that commitment or making it right.</p>

<p>I had a situation last year when I wanted to break my lease so badly – partially because one of my two roommates moved out with no notice (what your daughter is considering doing), so my other roommate and I were forced to each pay 1.5 times our usual rent. It would normally never occur to me to break the lease, but we did have moments when we were wondering if it would be financially easier to find a way to get out of it. So, first I would say your daughter should look for someone else, because bad roommates or not, these people might genuinely not be able to afford the extra rent. She signed a lease, she has the responsibility to pay that rent until the lease ends or she finds someone else.</p>

<p>Also, if she is getting shafted because her room is smaller, did she say anything hwen they moved in/picked their rooms? I have paid less for a smaller room. It could be worth bringing up, although I don’t know if she’d get anywhere now that they’ve moved in, but maybe she could say “okay, so if you think there’s no difference do you want to trade rooms?”</p>

<p>Also, has she talked to her roommates at all? I think regular house meetings to discuss issues are important for roommates to get along. Non-confrontationally, but there should be open lines of communication. She can help to create that. Go around the group, ask what everyone’s problems are. Are people eating each other’s food, does there need to be a cleaning schedule, etc.</p>

<p>Lastly, I have lived with my best friend, and consider it extremely lucky that we are still friends after that. She will not necessarily be happier. There are personality conflicts and issues that come up that you never ever would have predicted, and if someone is your friend it can be harder to talk about it.</p>



<p>She did not get the shaft, the got the room for the amount she agreed to pay. </p>



<p>No. Your daughter would be responsible to pay the difference. </p>

<p>If I were the parent of one of the other girls, I would absolutely help my child to take steps to hold your daughter responsible.</p>

<p>My daughter is living off campus- but we had to co-sign the lease, as did the parent of her roommate- I think that is more common when renting to college students-</p>

<p>Oh wait- she * is in college* isn’t she?</p>

<p>If she breaks lease, I think the other college students could take her to small claims court for her share. And of course they will complain to all their friends about the bad roommate who left them high and dry. The landlord is unlikely to do something because he can demand the full amount of rent no matter how many tenants there are. But obviously, it would be irresponsible of your daughter to just up and move out, leaving the other tenants on the hook for her share of the rent.</p>

<p>She needs to find someone to replace her–yes, at the same amount that she has been paying. It is not the other tenants’ fault that she doesn’t feel her bedroom size was worth the price. Splitting a house or apartment never guarantees that each tenant will get the exact same amount of space and if she had a problem with that, the time to speak up was before signing the lease.</p>


Point is, landlords who rent to students factor this into their business. They are not going to sue a student into the next century for breaking a lease, it’s not cost-effective.</p>

<p>This kind of drama is one reason I am very reluctant to rent to students (the 200 person house parties are another), and I won’t even consider it without a parent co-sign. But even then, if the parent is out of state, pursuing them is close to impossible.</p>


I’m not sure that this would actually be the case, unless the 4 roommates had signed a separate agreement saying they each will pay 1/4. Would an oral agreement be enforceable? Morally, she has an obligation of course, but I am not sure about legally. And even if they win, collecting on a judgment like this is not easy. Been there, done that.</p>

<p>Ethically, the OP’s daughter needs to make good, either by finding a replacement, getting the roommates to find a replacement and let her out of the lease, or pay what she owes.</p>

<p>I’m not really of the school that if a kid makes a mistake like picking bad roommates, they need to “(wo)man up” and stick it out to the bitter end so they learn some kind of life lesson (especially if it starts impacting schoolwork), that’s why I would like to know how much money is at stake here. If she wants out so badly she’ll eat the extra rent (and this is feasible) what is the problem? And chances are in a month or two she can find a replacement.</p>

<p>OP: What does the lease say about subletting?</p>