<p>Wow! These are great. My kids and their friends have similar issures, but 20 year olds!!! I sure hope not! Hard to imagine how long a kid around here could survive without driving. My 15 year old sons ride, my daughter, is essentially gone now, so he has learned to rely on his bike more and more ( while he’s working on the 30 hours of online classwork he needs to take the written test for his learners permit). I will drop him offf with it, and he texts me from all over town! The “town” is only about 10 miles in any direction, but if he had to count on me, his social life would be a lot more limited. My son does not “get” why I have issues with endless sleep overs; I’m not sure I “get” it either, but this thread and the “can you sleep at night” one sure speak to some of my issues!</p>
<p>Oh, so I am not the only mother of a teen, and young adult living this! Shrink, my 20 y/o drives (drives me crazy, LOL, and drives a car). He would drive his brother, but he was working when I went through my movie episode today. </p>
<p>Mom60, you and I have had some similar experiences. Oh, I must say, my younger son always helps carry in groceries, and with a smile on his face. He does like to help, and he wants to see what I bought that he likes to eat 
My older son will help with groceries, but he needs to look like he is going to have root canal while he helps out. He does get the job done, but would rather pass the chore onto his younger brother if possible. What is with lack of manners with their friends? I really don’t understand why a simple thank you, and bringing an empty plate to the sink/dishwasher is so difficult for some young people today! I know that they know what is right. I know it was taught to them, so why don’t they follow through with basic manners?</p>
<p>Sorry northeastmom; I thought it was the 20 year old needing the ride, but really it was probably the idea of 20 year olds and “sleepovers” I was reponding to…I find the boys vary a LOT with regard to manners, and maybe it depends on where they are. A few of my sons friends I want to call “Eddie Haskel” if I thought they would get it. SO polite and helpful, I’m SURE they are up to something. But usually an opportunity for me to point out to S how easy it is to put dishes IN the dishwasher, located, as it is, just a few inches from the sink…but look! The dishwasher is full of clean dishes…what to do…what to do…</p>
<p>Are you daring to suggest someone actually empty the dishwasher?</p>
<p>In our house, that someone is 99% of the time, me.</p>
<p>I would gladly wash AND dry anyone’s dishes by hand if they would come over and unload my dishwasher. Why I hate that chore so much I do not know.</p>
<p>Especially the “silverware”!</p>
<p>I sympathize with your rant! D2 had a friend over to hang out a couple of evenings ago. Friend stayed for dinner, watched movies, etc. Soon it was 10:00 p.m. Then it was 11:00 p.m. These kids don’t drive yet, so obviously a parent was going to have to chauffeur the friend home–but the girls showed absolutely no consideration for the fact that their parents needed to get up early in the morning for work. I’m sure they would’ve kept on watching movies and yakking it up until 2 a.m. if I hadn’t asked pointedly when Friend would be going home!</p>
<p>They’re good kids, but they aren’t very clued into being considerate of other people. Especially when it’s their parents.</p>
<p>lunitari, I am surprised that your D’s friend’s parents did not call to tell her that they need to pick her up at some point. I would have done that with my kids. </p>
<p>My younger son currently has a friend who is one of 5 siblings. He does not drive yet, and his parents never drive. I guess if they had to chase down all 5 kids they would go crazy. He needs to walk, or figure out a way to get home. This means that if there is a thunderstorm and he is at my house, I would choose to drive him home bc he would otherwise leave my house and walk in that kind of weather. On the other hand, if it looks like there will be thunderstorm coming, I call my son, and tell him that he must leave and walk home before the storm comes. Sigh…different parenting styles, I guess.</p>
<p>It’s been a while for me (S has been driving for 3 years now), but he had a friend that he would go to the movies with. For some reason, they always wanted to go to the late show. I was almost always the one to have to pick up after the movie between 11 pm and midnight. S would make a pitch for me to do the drop off trip, but I guess he was overruled by other mom and he knew I wouldn’t leave them stranded. It’s in the past for me now, but it was annoying at the time.</p>
<p>kitty, I completely understand, and that is where I drive a hard bargain. I will drive to the movies, and I want the other parent to pick up!</p>
<p>We have a rule that no one can sleep past 9:00am. There are always exceptions, like illness or a really late night at work. I think this set our D up well for having to get up for class and work. It just annoys me when D tells me that she is waiting for a friend to wake up for plans they have made. This is usually at noon. What good can come from laying around for that long?</p>
<p>nem ~ I wouldn’t have minded taking turns with the late night pick up! It just seemed that I always got it by default. I guess for some reason they were always at the other kid’s house when the plans were made and that mom got first choice, even if my S tried to help me out!</p>
<p>kitty, well now they are part of childrearing memories. All of the things that I ranted about will become a distant memory in the not too distant future.</p>
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<p>This is my S to a T. He gets completely self-righteous and furious when I either nag him, because I’ve already asked him to mow the grass 5 times and it’s about to rain, or just go out there and start doing it myself. (That usually gets him to come out. ) His latest episode was because I gave up waiting for him to carry the 50 lb sack of chicken food out to the hen house and fill up the feeder, as it was growing dark, and did it myself. (The girls were out of food and needed it to be full in the AM when they wake up and do most of their eating.) He came out and had a fit that I did it. Didn’t I trust him to do it? (Short answer: no, or at least not in time. Tomorrow at noon is too late.) </p>
<p>And all of his teachers talk about how nice and kind he is…at least it’s comforting to know that he treats OTHER people well!</p>
<p>ok, show of hands. How many of you have done the end of movie pickup wearing your pj’s? I’ll admit I have!</p>
<p>Chintzy, LOL, no, it hasn’t gone that far. Probably because I try for the early leg of the carpool.</p>
<p>Update, I drove my son for tickets again today (it did not work out yesterday), and while we were on the ticket line my son got a call from yet another kid. He wanted to know if I could lay out the money for a ticket for him, and drive him later. My son, wised up, and said no. He saw the experience we had yesterday and my reaction. He learned from it. He already knows that another parent already bought 3 movie tickets for this young man and that parent has yet to be paid back (yes, the teen agreed to reimburse the other for his ticket on all 3 occasions). I guess I am not the only parent who has been through this, and I won’t be the last.</p>
<p>I haven’t done the PJ’s to the movies but I have done it to pick my D up at her friend who lives about 1/4 mile away. I also used to sometimes do it for the elementary school drive. I have an unwritten rule that PJ’s are okay if I am in my neighborhood community, if I have to drive out on public roads I usually make myself put on real clothes.
What drove my kids crazy was that for the late night pickup I would put on clothes but wear my slippers. I solved that two years ago by getting a pair of ugg boots. Can slip them on and they are cozy.
The kid who never has money drives me crazy. How about the last minute decision to go to the movies. Friend is already at your house. Of course you front the money because everyone on them will swear they will get the money from their parent and pay you back. Rarely happens.
My only non driver has been away all week with a friend. She comes back into town tonight. My gas gauge has been close to full all week. Of course I picking the girls up at the airport. Mom of other girl is still out of town. The plan was for me to drop the girl at her house where her Dad would meet her. The Dad called yesterday saying he wanted to go out of town and would I pick up the girls and could his D stay with me for another 24 hours. I was proud of myself and said No that I had already been clear with the Mom (parents divorced) that I had plans for Sunday and could not have their D.This is a common occurance with this family.</p>
<p>Mom60, Good for you!</p>
<p>Haven’t done the pj’s yet. And D gets her license this fall, so I think I’ll be able to avoid that one! Lets be honest, if it’s really late… I send DH. ;-)</p>