<p>Our daughter’s 1 1/2 year old pet kitty arrived here last night. We are keeping him (neutered male) in our upstairs bathroom. We also have our almost 15 year old fixed female kitty. We THOUGHT the younger one would terrorize the older one, but when we let the new kitty out of the bathroom, our older cat scared the living day lights out of the new cat.</p>
<p>We have our kitty in the basement (a large space) right now…but we are hoping that both cats will be able to coexist .</p>
<p>Any suggestions on how to help them learn to get along???</p>
<p>Just set up the newbie in its own room with a box and food for a few days. Leave the door shut and let them sniff under the door. Then, crack the door open an inch, blocked by something, and let them sniff and paw through the door. Then, open the door, after you’ve established the room as a comfort zone for the new kitty.</p>
<p>They may or may not end up being buddies, but they’ll probably tolerate each other.</p>
<p>Seriously I had 13-14 yo cat when I adopted (or rather my D2 did) a 1 yo cat. Both neutered males. They didn’t like each other and both had what my vet called “alpha personalities.” I had a couple of vet visits (bites, abscesses) during the first year until they had sorted out their dominance hierarchy. But no lasting damage was done to either cat.</p>
<p>The boys eventually settled things, but it took time. They are still not best buds, but they have been known to curl up together. They gang up to chase off all the neighbor cats out of the yard. And they team tag hunting mice in the backyard. (Which is so funny to watch.)</p>
<p>BTW, my older cat (now 17 years old) gave as good as he got and when he’s in a mood will start still start sh** with the other cat.</p>
<p>Don’t know how serious the confrontation was but the older cat has the house as its territory and certainly wanted the younger one to know that. But that doesn’t mean the older cat isn’t willing to share. It may mean he needs to feel, at least for now, that the younger isn’t a threat, which is the lesson he may have taught. You can’t know. They may never like each other but they may tolerate each other pretty well. I find that cats grasp reality better than people do. When the older cat sees the younger one is going to be there, they’ll work out how to share the space. It’s amazing how well cats can co-exist without much interaction. </p>
<p>In that regard, I’m more a fan of letting them mix unless there is uninhibited aggression.</p>
<p>The old cat is usually very sweet, but she really hissed and growled, and swatted at this new kitty. So we separated them again. We wanted new kitty to get to explore the house so we put old kitty in the basement for about an hour. New kitty explored and the went back up to the bathroom. He is now closed in there and old kitty has the run if the house again. </p>
<p>I think we’ll try keeping them separated for a few more days with trials at being loose at the same time.</p>
<p>I would like to avoid a trip to the vet with an injured cat!</p>
<p>I had two cats that were the same age and then one passed. I got 2 new kitties. My old kitty hates the new kitties (they’re now 2). She hisses at them, etc, but that’s as far as it goes. </p>
<p>I think this helped: I let the kitties have free-range downstairs, while older kitty spent most time either upstairs or in the backyard. After a few weeks, the new kitties had left their scent (from their paws) all over. So, I think old kitty accepted that this was their territory, too. however, old kitty still will not let either one near her while she’s eating.</p>
<p>Try a baby gate across the doorway separating the cats so that they can safely meet each other before sharing space. We recently did this with an adult cat joining other adult cats in their home. It took over a week, but by two weeks things were fine and by three weeks things were good.</p>
<p>We are living this now. Adopted 5-month old Toby almost two months ago and have two 9-year-old females. I followed all the advice on CC. Here’s the thread:</p>
<p>My post of August 29 seems so optimistic. Since then we’ve had a vet visit for bite/abscess. We have taken a step back: separate but equal. Toby has the run of the bedroom/bathroom at night and house during the day. He flips space with the other two. When they spend time together, I’m armed with a spray bottle (water) - vet’s suggestion. Aggression with intent to harm gets a squirt and it seems to work. (There’s that optimism again.) Hard to blame the older cats; Toby wants so badly to play with them and they just want to be left alone. Still he is a part of the family now and IT WILL EVENTUALLY BE OKAY.</p>
<p>Does anyone watch the TV show, “My Cat From Hell”? They deal with cat behavior, cat to cat behavior, cat to dog and cat to human. The approaches are standard to each example, it takes a lot of owner dedication and time. At the end of 3-5 weeks, if the owners follow the advice, the situations seemed to be revolved. Some of the tips were extensive play time by owner with each cat, separating food dishes and time of meals in the beginning, and making an “escape” route available to the cat that is being pursued. They recommend against the use of spray bottles. It appears to be a balancing act. Hope it works out well for everyone.</p>
<p>My son’s cat, now about 16 years old and showing every bit of it, was vicious to every other cat we ever had. He liked to sit on the counters and wait for another cat to walk under him, then drop down on the cat and bite across the spine. It made for several expensive vet bills before we figured out how to keep him separate from the others. He’s been an only cat for about 8 years now (and living with my son). He’s still called “psychocat” by friends, since even Prozac didn’t help. Incredibly affectionate with humans, though.</p>
<p>Cats are essentially loners. Some learn to get along, some don’t. Good luck.</p>
<p>Male cats tend to be loners in the wild. Female cats in the wild live in groups. </p>
<p>Cats bind to places and physical territories. But they share them with other cats. If you follow a cat outside, they have their habitual areas and these intersect with other cats. They may never stop to talk or say hello. They are, especially once past a certain age, essentially predators who are looking for prey and prey-like play - chasing bugs is a big occupation for cats. They intersect with other cats but that’s about it.</p>
<p>This is true in the house. Our male cats can share spaces but not be together. The ones that are close, that grew up together, can play fight but the ones that don’t know how to do that or who lack the trust to do that just get along. They figure it out because we control when they go out and, most of all, we control the food supply. It’s funny watching them navigate the doorways: who steps aside, who waits outside while the other door guards. If a cat wants out, he may jump over a door guard because coming from behind doesn’t cause a confrontation and the door guard cat ignores the event because it fits in their cat rules. In most cases, there is no clear pattern of alpha and betas and no clear pecking order because male house cats aren’t lions who live in prides but solitary hunters who mate randomly when a female is heat. This is why I tend to believe cats should be left to work it out. Since cats fight as play and rarely hurt each other, I only step in when it looks like there is real intent to injure. That has almost never happened because the cats work it out. We did have one true alpha male cat who was absurdly dominant - and I’m sure he wasn’t missed when he left - and I did have to step in a few times to end his forcing of abject submission. </p>
<p>BTW, my favorite way to get cats to get along is treats. Every cat likes something special. Tuna. Turkey. They learn to get along if you give them treats because they focus on eating them even when they’re near each other. Breaks down the proximity barrier. A can of light tuna packed in water does wonders.</p>
<p>My older cat does not like to share a litter box with the younguns. Makes sure you have as many litter boxes as cats in the house. In fact, now my older cat won’t bury his “stuff”. Vet says it’s a dominance thing.</p>
<p>I had a beta cat, meaning a lower status animal, that never buried anything. If cats are used to indoors, they have their own habits. One of mine landscapes. He isn’t concerned with burying anything; he has a need to dig holes. He digs up all the litter from one side and piles it on the other. Outside, he’ll dig one hole, maybe another and go to the bathroom in one but not always. None are as annoying as the one that insisted on coming in to use the litter box. No matter how many times I told him to go outside, he’d run in, do his business and run out. </p>
<p>Thing with a cat that’s been alone for life, a new cat is a tremendous upset. Cats need companions too. Outside, they have an intricate dance of relationships with other cats and the constant stimulation of nature. They can be alone but they aren’t lonely. They are relating to other cats as cats. Inside, they are bored and are lonely. But cats can’t express emotions well, for good or bad. I believe in letting animals be themselves and that my job is to try to let them be what they naturally are, with allowances for my comfort and their safety. In other words, they learn to come in at night because I don’t want to worry about them getting eaten by a coyote.</p>
<p>I have one that doesn’t bury either and the vet told me it wasn’t dominance - it was a cat who doesn’t like his litter box. Suggested I switch to unscented litter. I tried it and hubby had a massive allergy attack because it was so dusty. I switched back and decided it is easier to live with unburied you-know than a wheezing hubby. Second cat likes to create those kitty-litter mountains too. He buries for both when he’s in the mood. Cat who won’t bury is dominant, both are neutered males. Dominant cat also doesn’t do well in the grooming department. I think he believes he is above all that and his slave (me) should bury for him, scoop for him, and wash him - which I dutifully do. The one advantage is that he has no hairballs to cough up.</p>
<p>Apparently the rule of thumb to litter boxes is have as many litter boxes as you have cats - plus one. I have two side by side (I can’t figure out where to put plus one) and both are used by both cats, but when I only had one Mr. Dominance peed on the carpet - constantly!</p>
<p>As one who uses the name 3girls3cats, I couldn’t resist this thread. We have an 18 year old cat and 2 three year olds. I’m sure it doesn’t come as a big surprise that the old lady doesn’t like the youngsters and wants as little as possible to do with them. </p>
<p>I’m with lergnom for the most part. I tend to let the cats work things out on their own and trust in their ability to do that. I help things along with the liberal use of treats and I did try to introduce the new cats to the old cats in a gradual and graduated way. I’m not sure it made any difference. There’s been no violence at all, just some hissing and a little bit of chasing. If there had been a more pronounced reaction, I would have intervened more emphatically and would not have been as laissez faire. Even so, cats do tend to make a lot of noise and do a lot of posturing. It’s not serious unless it escalates to true violence and someone is hurt…or if either cat starts urinating outside the litter box. That’s a tricky and difficult situation. Old lady cat started out as an outdoor-only cat so when we adopted her we had no choice but to allow her outside whenever she wanted. She won’t use a litter box and sprays like a wild tom outside. The younger ones, thank goodness, are vigilant about their litter boxes. </p>
<p>All three of them know the instant the flea and tick medicine makes its appearance and run like the wind, treats or not.</p>
and I did try to introduce the new cats to the old cats in a gradual and graduated way. I’m not sure it made any difference. There’s been no violence at all, just some hissing and a little bit of chasing. If there had been a more pronounced reaction, I would have intervened more emphatically and would not have been as laissez faire. Even so, cats do tend to make a lot of noise and do a lot of posturing. It’s not serious unless it escalates to true violence and someone is hurt…or if either cat starts urinating outside the litter box. That’s a tricky and difficult situation. Old lady cat started out as an outdoor-only cat so when we adopted her we had no choice but to allow her outside whenever she wanted. She won’t use a litter box and sprays like a wild tom outside. The younger ones, thank goodness, are vigilant about their litter boxes. </p>