OMG I am on facebook

Parent Cafe
21

<p>My niece is mortified that her mother is there , though some of her friends are on her list.
I think she should stick with her own social circle and leave her daughter’s friends out of it.
When my older daughter went to off to college she had me on her myspace ( which she sometimes sent me polls and stuff like that. My cat had one too…perhaps still does but I limit his use of the computer for obvious reasons ;)</p>

<p>What I find odd is the occasional email notification of random unknown people wanting to friend me.
Also our niece in Sweden has apparently friended some of one of our daughter’s friends and she is weirded out by it…they are not close and haven’t even seen each other in 4 yrs…she is a little embarrassed by it because her pics are a bit provocative</p>

22

<p>My D created a Facebook page for me before she left for college and insisted I be her friend. It’s worked out well. A lot of her friends from high school, who I’ve known through church or her sport, have requested to be my friend (I do not ask them, but will accept if they ask me). Surprisingly, my 21-year-old S requested that I be his friend, too. He’s not that active on it, so it’s a little boring. D is much more social and I’ve enjoyed seeing all her new friends in Seattle. (She does not drink or party, so all the photos are appropriate for an 18-year-old and I’ve had no qualms so far). S does drink and party but he doesn’t take photos of it, I guess. </p>

<p>I would not have created a Facebook page though if D did not think it was a great idea. I don’t want to spy or hover electronically or any other way… TMI!</p>

23

<p>I joined Facebook about a month ago after being talked into it by some people I play tennis with. I asked my 15 y.o. daughter if she would mind if I “friended” her, and she said that would be fine. A few days later, I received a friend request from my college freshman son!!! (I hadn’t requested to friend him in the first place because I figured he wouldn’t want to be my FB friend, but I was wrong, LOL.) Since then, I have received several friend requests from my kids’ friends, too. Most of my FB friends are my own friends, though. :)</p>

24

<p>I’m on Facebook - started a group for my Girl Scout troop. To my shock, both my kids accepted me as a friend.</p>

25

<p>My kids are my friends. I am careful not to annoy 14 year old son, lest he unfriend me :slight_smile: - he is more self conscious than my d. My daughter and I use facebook messaging and I really like seeing how she is doing at her faraway college. Some of my daughters best friends from her senior year of high school have friended me and I get little updates on how they are doing at their faraway colleges. I am friends with sisters in law, nieces, nephews, etc., and especially love seeing baby pictures. I love facebook.</p>

<p>A number of my friends daughters got them “set up on facebook” before the daughters left for college last August, so we have a little moms-on-facebook group from my kids H.S. It is fun.</p>

26

<p>I’m not on Facebook but my SIL (35) is. She befriended S2 - he was shocked but accepted her request…although I think he is regretting it. During Christmas dinner SIL made a few references to son’s page and “what does that mean”…etc.</p>

27

<p>I have fallen in love with FB. I joined it a year ago because that was the only way that I could find out about a particularly community service project – a hunger week – at S’s college. Because I have an interest in that issue, all I did was use FB to see how the students were addressing hunger.</p>

<p>Then, a year later, I got a consulting project that required me to design a FB page. At that point, I got hooked to FB. At first S was not interested in friending me because he thought it was weird. I didn’t pressure him. However, we happen to have a lot of friends in common due to some community service and theater activities that we both do. Many of these friends – ranging from high school age students to senior citizens – were friends with both of us on FB, so finally S decided he might as well friend me, too.</p>

<p>It has worked out fine. He just doesn’t want me to comment on FB on any pictures he posts. He thinks that is weird, and would rather that I make my comments on another photo site that we both use.</p>

<p>I’ve also connected with many of my former college students and high school mentees via FB. Most are now in their late 20s to mid 30s. It’s fun to find out about their lives and to see how similar their lives are to how mine were at their ages. </p>

<p>With the exception of a mutual adult theater friend (age 37) who posted a picture of her butt painted like a pumpkin for Halloween, I haven’t seen anything inappropriate. </p>

<p>To my surprise, I’ve also been friended by some high school classmates from the small 99.9% white Upstate NY town where I grew up and integrated the school system . I had absolutely loathed high school, felt horribly isolated and different, and once I left, I never looked back. I was surprised that any classmates remembered me, and it has been interesting to see how similar our interests are. For instance, I have had an interesting exchange with a classmate who is on staff at a New England college and mentors a lot of students.</p>

28

<p>D2 had no issue befriending me. D1 will not. Oh, well. I have friends whose kids allow them on their facebooks, so these friends have seen D1’s facebook. They say it’s rather boring. </p>

<p>I promised D2 that I would never post anything publicly on her wall, but after the election, she wrote a note that I thought was incredibly mature and thought-provoking. I was so proud of her that I did tell her that (along with a few of her friends) on her wall. </p>

<p>Then, New Year’s Eve, I put up under a ‘what are you doing now’ thing that I was feeling bad for her because she was stuck at home sick on NYE. Several of my friends read it, and, when they sent me Happy New Year’s greetings, said, I hope D2 feels better/has a quick recovery. So D2 then wrote on my wall something along the lines of, mom, just thought you ought to know that it’s kind of creepy that people are sending me get well wishes through your facebook. These are people she’s never met (and I haven’t met most of them in person). What happened is that at midnight NYE, I sent out a bunch of Happy New Year messages to my FB friends. So when they came to my site to reciprocate, and read my comment, some of them felt compelled to comment on D’s condition. So, lesson learned. Frankly, I never thought she really looked at my site, but now I know.</p>

<p>I also have friended my nieces. But I do not ask to friend any of my kids’ friends. A few have asked to friend me, and I do say yes, but I’ve written maybe a handful of posts on any of their walls. It just feels uncomfortable to insert myself in their lives using the FB medium.</p>

29

<p>Nobody in the family uses FaceBook or MySpace. I’ve had too much experience in computer hacking, security training and computer science to use something that inherently unsafe.</p>

30

<p>I got on Facebook to play Scrabulous with my sister-in-law. Scrabulous is no more, but I’m still on. Both my kids are on Facebook, but neither want to friend me. Unbeknownst to them my nephew left his facebook account and password on one of our computers and I’ve signed in on his login out of curiousity. He’s only friends with my older son - as expected his page is extremely dull. He has more friends than I’d expect - mostly college kids. Younger son uses facebook a lot and I’d love to know what he’s up to, but I do basically trust him and have been shown bits of it from time to time.</p>

31

<p>A coworker told me that his son had viruses on his new computer and was surprised at that and wondered what his son was doing. I told him that he could configure his router to log ip addresses to see which sites he’s on. If you’re using a computer or network that belongs to someone else, then the owner or even someone else on the network, may be able to monitor what you’re doing.</p>

32

<p>I only have 7 friends cause I just barely started using it- & I was amused to find that two people I know from very dissimiliar things ( one from my class who lives in the larger Seattle area & one who lives in Chicago) know each other.</p>

<p>( they both were like * how do you know this person*? :confused:</p>

<p>But my husband barely can check his work email- I am afraid to mention computers to him at all.</p>

33

<p>I recently joined FB at the request of my sister to share family news and pictures. I used a made-up name so now I have a page but none of my family members can figure out who I am. </p>

<p>Two years ago I joined facebook out of curiosity but during the registration process the darn thing started sending “friend requests” to every email in my address book, which included several of my son’s female track teammates. I took a lot of pictures at track meets and sent pics to parents and kids that wanted them. I was so humiliated at the prospect of these hs girls getting friend requests from me that I immediately canceled my fb account!</p>

34

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<p>Why? This means your kids can’t be friends with their teachers, their professors, their advisers, their friends’ parents, their bosses, etc. What’s wrong with maintaining ties with those adults?</p>

<p>Facebook is not a kids-only place anymore. There are millions of responsible professional people on Facebook. In fact, I figure if kids are friends with a responsible adult, that means they are more likely to keep compromising material and photos off of their Facebook page.</p>

<p>My daughter’s high school friends friended me before my daughter did; she eventually friended me, although I know it creeps her out a bit. She doesn’t put much up there, and has settings that prevent most of what she does from being on my news feed – on anyone’s feed, actually, since she doesn’t like people knowing what she’s doing. Some of her college friends thought it was “cool” that I had a Facebook profile, and friended me. I wish them Happy Birthday and look at their photos. </p>

<p>Of my 130+ friends, 18 are under the age of 21. The rest are coworkers, college friends, etc. I have reconnected with friends from my childhood (we’re putting our elementary school class pictures up). My husband is using it to plan his high school reunion.</p>

<p>Some kids still complain about grown-ups being on Facebook, but it’s a lost cause. Adults are there to stay. I assume that eventually a kids-only site will emerge - but chances are it will also expand to all ages, since that’s the business model that makes the most sense. </p>

<p>Many younger kids accept that Facebook is for adults, too. When a coworker’s 15-year-old daughter found out I had Facebook she too said “cool” and by the time I got home she had already friended me. </p>

<p>I get the occasional stranger who friends me, or someone who knows someone I know, and I just ignore them.</p>

35

<p>I got on Facebook 3-4 years ago when D went off to college. It was easier for her to send me to her Facebook page than to explain what was going on in her life. Her younger sister isn’t quite so forthcoming–I haven’t sent her a friend request and she hasn’t sent me one either.</p>

<p>Just this week, I’ve had an avalanche of friend requests. Looks like the tennis team ladies are just now discovering Facebook and my high school class is thinking about using Facebook as a gathering place. </p>

<p>This will be the death of Facebook–now that the over 50s have embraced it!</p>

36

<p>"We must have a really open social circle here because my children and most of their friends have adults and kids both in our circle as their friends. "</p>

<p>That’s my personal experience. There are cultures in which people socialize across generations. I’ve found that true in some churches: Quakers, for instance, tend to socialize via potlucks and other family-friendly events. I’ve also found that people who are Hispanic, and European socialize here across generations.</p>

<p>I don’t mean the kind of social activities in which parents hold keg parties for their kids. I mean things like holiday parties, graduation parties in which people across generations attend and talk to each other.</p>

<p>In such situations, people can become friends --real friends – with people who are of a different generation than they are, and for such people, it would be natural to become FB friends. I’ve got friends like that myself.</p>

37

<p>This will be the death of Facebook–now that the over 50s have embraced it!</p>

<p>Especially since I put the Blue Scholars on my music list :wink: sorry guys.</p>

38

<p>Need a new website for the over 50s moms… Ifeelbadaboutmyneck.com</p>

<p>Still working on one for the dads…</p>

39

<p>I went on facebook after a friend who moved away encouraged me to. It’s great! I don’t know what the kids are worried about…I’ve got a bunch of my friends (near & far) as contacts. I wouldn’t request my son as a friend–not that he’d say yes, but I don’t think I really need to hear the specific details/language of his life/friends. They all make a very fine impression when they hang out at our house…no need to mess with that! :-)</p>

40

<p>There are a few teachers at my son’s school who are on FB and have friended currently enrolled students. I don’t know who extended the friend request, but think it is an incredibly bad idea.</p>