On piercings and tattoos

Parent Cafe
1

<p>Here I am in the parents forum to ask a question. (After some background information. You can skip it if you want to and go the actual question at the bottom.) </p>

<p>My parents and I saw some old friends who were the girl I was best friends with in preschool, her parents, and her sister. My old best friend had received a small nose stud a few days before. This sparked a heated debate between my parents and I. I understood their arguments but I don’t support them. My dad says that piercings and tattoos are too medically risky to get and remove. He says he had coworkers who got tattoos when younger and are now facing problems as they try to remove them as much older adults. I can understand how risky they are, as I have a small (barely noticeable, when earrings are in it can’t be seen) keloid on my right earlobe. Now, as I consider future piercings and possibly tattoos, I have to understand that I have a higher risk of developing them on any future sites. And I’ve heard various horror stories of medical complications. But at the same time, I think you can’t give them too much of a bad rap. If you go into it having done research on the procedure itself and the shop you’re getting it done at, and know how to take care of it, then you are taking as much responsibility as possible. In addition, it can be argued that nessesary medical sugery is just as dangerous. The risk of infection and complications is there as well. My mother, on the other hand, says they are socially risky. Employers may discriminate against tattoos and piercings, which I sadly have to understand. She also seems to think they are an automatic determination of work ethic and character, which I think is outrageous, but unfortunetly still in our society today. I hate attitudes like this. My hair stylist has tattoos out in the open, up and down her arms. She also owns her own sucessful salon and reads good books all the time. A teacher of mine is forced to wear long sleeved shirts all the time as he also has tattoos up and down his arms. He has truly inspired alumni and current students, including me, and is featured in the yearbook every year (an honor). He is honestly the best teacher I have ever had. So I made the following arguments, and instead of taking it seriously, my parents basically said, “Oh, its just teen angst” and proceeded to tell me if I come home from college with tattoos/piercings they will be angry. (I plan to do this…) </p>

<p>So. What are other adults opinions on tattoos and piercings? Are they too dangerous? Socially acceptable? What do you allow on your child, and do you have a time when you say, “It’s their desicion now”? </p>

<p>Thanks!!</p>

2

<p>Same situation XD
Except my parents freak out about perfectly normal unshocking ear piercings… lol</p>

<p>I am also very interested in hearing the opinions of adults :)</p>

3

<p>Whether visible tattoos or piercings other than small ones for earrings are socially acceptable depends on the social context.</p>

<p>In the industry and region where I work, no one seems to care that much for non-customer-facing people, but I would not be surprised if those who have to face the “outside” (sales/marketing/executives) generally have to be more careful about such things (i.e. not have any tattoos visible when wearing normal work clothing). In addition, some industries or employers are more conservative about such things, so that even non-customer-facing people need to avoid having visible tattoos or piercings other than small ones for earrings on women.</p>

<p>Also, even if tattoos are socially accepted in general where you are, tattoos that convey a specific message (even if unintended) may be a problem if that message is not something that is well accepted.</p>

<p>Remember also that tattoos and piercings are “permanent”, or at least difficult to reverse. Don’t get one without a lot of thought about it beforehand.</p>

4

<p>Check out this thread from the Parents Cafe a while back. There is good medical information as well as opinions on tattoos and piercings. I personally love my own tattoo, and I am a long way from teenager. I also feel that most piercings are not permanent. You can’t even see my nose piercing, since it has been out for 15 years. </p>

<p><a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/parent-cafe/1185803-piercings-tattoos-what-your-son-daughter-should-know.html?highlight=tattoo[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/parent-cafe/1185803-piercings-tattoos-what-your-son-daughter-should-know.html?highlight=tattoo&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

5

<p>If you already know you keloid, you are at even great risk & likelihood that you will have disfiguring scars from ANY invasive procedure–medically necessary or merely “cosmetic,” such as piercing.</p>

<p>The difference between medically necessary vs. cosmetic is the difference between having surgery to remove an infection vs. piercing perfectly healthy skin and/or other body parts and possibly CAUSING an infection or more. I can’t see that the two are related other than both can cause some trauma to the body and both will require healing.</p>

<p>I personally have known people who were NOT hired because they have piercing and/or tattoos. I also know that people DO judge (often negatively) people with these visible piercings and tattoos). People are also making a very profitable living REMOVING tattoos that are unwanted later in life, which involves additional pain and considerable cost, often involving multiple visits. </p>

<p>Personally, I have difficulty understanding why people would PAY for the privilege of having someone permanently put ink/art on them or holes in their body. It boggles my mind and makes me question the intelligence of such people. </p>

<p>If either of my kids came home with piercings and tattoos, I would definitely be VERY upset. I would be concerned about the health risks they incurred in getting the piercings and tattoos (hepetitis & other infections), as well as how they jeopardize their options by how they appear to others. </p>

<p>Like it or not, many of those with power to hire or not ARE concerned about the image people hired will project and many are NOT looking for tattoos and multiple piercings in their employees.</p>

<p>There was a thread here about tattoos and the D possibly losing college funding from her folks that you could search for.</p>

6

<p>Most medical professionals have to discuss the risks vs the benefits. That always puts “necessary” vs “cosmetic” surgery into different groups. </p>

<p>Risk of keloids puts this in a somewhat different risk category as well.</p>

<p>Oops! Cross posted with the above…I must have taken a really long time to post!</p>

<p>BTW; my D got a Bible verse, in Latin, tattooed on her wrist…I am glad she didn’t get keloids like my sister, but am a little irked by the idea that she had money for that, and not some other things. She says it costs less than brothers car mods. I am also glad she chose where she got it done wisely.</p>

7

<p>What’s up with teens getting piercings nowadays seems all races are getting them</p>

8

<p>If you lived in San Francisco in the early 90s, it seemed like everybody had some sort of body art then too. It really isn’t a new thing.</p>

9

<p>well, is everyone against ear piercigs? like, the normal kind on the ear lobe</p>

10

<p>Where I grew up, in the sixties, girls I knew routinely got ear piercings well before the first birthday, if not in the nursery. It was apparently a cultural thing.</p>

<p>So no, not everyone is against…BUT my sister got keloids, and did not try again until she was an adult.</p>

11

<p>I think ear piercing is very acceptable, as long as you keep it simple.</p>

12

<p>i think that the lobe (normal) ear piercings are okay. I mean really, its 2012, ive never met anyone against them. Even when I looked at the thread mizzbee suggested the first post said that those are okay. My parents are okay with them too. (Lobe piercing is the only piercing they are okay with, however.) Also, looking at “recent history” over the years, I can’t believe that people still don’t like employees with tattoos. Of course, you have to look at the company image, what the customers are looking for, etc, but would you rather have a “bare” employee who had a rough personality and did a horrible job or one with piercings and tattoos who was stellar.
In my defense, I’ve done tons of keloid research, and plan to visit a doctor before I get anything else done. After research, I believe the reason why it developed was my aftercare. I was told to spin the earring around when cleaning but then leave it alone, but I would absentmindedly spin it at the computer or when reading. I have zero family history, and my doctor who orginally discovered it was quite surprised that I had it. Also I plan to leave piercings out when working, and if I get tattoos to get them in places entirely hidden by clothing. BUT i just think that in our modern times it is silly to go, “oh a tattoo/piercing, must be a bad employee!”</p>

13

<p>I would say that SOME conservative places do NOT find pierced ear lobes (even the most basic) on males acceptable and that was one of the reasons a friend’s S was NOT offered a job–he wore LARGE zircon earrings in his pierced ears and the owner felt it would be a poor fit for her conservative clients. The RN was otherwise very well-qualified. :(</p>

14

<p>This discussion seems to come up over and over again, and each time I do feel obligated to throw in my two cents. </p>

<p>To summarize, do some people judge? Sure. Are there risks involved in getting piercings or tattoos? Absolutely. Are these minimized by proper care and precautions? Very significantly. </p>

<p>Here’s my personal experience. I have had an eyebrow piercing since I was 13, and last year added a conch piercing into the mix (in addition to regular lobe piercings). Both were done at clean and reputable parlors (the first time my mother took me after making me wait several months to see if I was sure). Following the care instructions, I have never had any problems with my eyebrow. As for my ear, I did get a minor infection at one point because I played with it too much (read: my stupid error), but it cleared up with antibiotics and I haven’t had any problems since.</p>

<p>I can wholly understand the medical perspective against getting piercings, which I respect. For those who are pierced, though, the risk is accepted for the result, for whatever reasons, be it aesthetics, self-expression, you name it. For me, I love my piercings and I find them attractive. I like that they mark me as being a little bit different, which is certainly true, and believe it or not I do get compliments on them from time to time. </p>

<p>How has this really affected my life? From what I can gather, not much. The only person who has ever had very negative reaction that voiced it to me was a school bus driver. Other than that, an anatomy lab instructor poked fun a little bit, but this is the same woman who suggested that I apply to be a supplemental instructor for the course, so I don’t think that it impacted her opinion of me. </p>

<p>Ultimately, I don’t know of an opportunity that has passed me by as a result of my choices, though I won’t lie and say it isn’t possible. However, given my appearance I have still been an undergraduate research assistant (selected by the professor based on my class performance), a teaching assistant, and I am an RA, having worn my piercings to the interviews. On the other hand, I was not allowed any facial piercings when I worked as a cashier at Walmart, but I did not wear my eyebrow ring to the interview and simply took it out when I went to work. </p>

<p>In the end, when it counts I can make the decision to remove the offending articles, and I usually wouldn’t wear them to an interview or work (RA being a special case since I live where I work). As long as whatever you do can be reversed or covered during the day, it probably won’t affect you a whole lot, though I would be cautious if you’ve had a problem with keloid scarring.</p>

15

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<p>Your mom is right that in some companies, visible tats and “unusual” piercings are not OK. At the company where I work, you could be the most qualified applicant ever, but if you have a tattoo on your neck or an industrial in your ear, you won’t be hired. Period. </p>

<p>You might think my boss is hopelessly old-fashioned, or discriminatory, or judgmental about the wrongs things. But here’s the deal – in a hiring situation, the boss’s opinion is the only one that counts.</p>

16

<p>I am a boss and own a business. I do all the hiring. I simply won’t hire someone with facial piercings. I wish so many young people wouldn’t get tattoos, they usually look really trashy. I won’t hire someone with visible tattoos, they must be covered. That means when it’s 100 degrees outside and my reps can wear polo shirts, people with arm tattoos still have to wear a long sleeve shirt underneath.</p>

<p>My people are in hospitals in a professional environment speaking with medical personnel, or in a professional office. It just isn’t appropriate.</p>

17

<p>Tattoos are indelible symbols of expression. They are a permanent statement of how you felt at one particular moment in your life. Most of us who are old enough to be parents of college students would be embarrassed to be spouting a visible, permanent image of something we thought was meaningful at age 18. </p>

<p>Unless you are independently wealthy, there will always be people whose judgements of you matter, and some of those people will have negative opinions of visible tattoos.</p>

<p>If you took a poll of middle aged (or older) adults, and asked them about their regrets, they might talk about wishing they had taken more risks, traveled more, taken a gap year, etc. I’d be willing to bet that none of them would say, “I wish I had gotten a tattoo back when I was 20.”</p>

18

<p>RE POST #16 …</p>

<p>I also own a business. I won’t hire sales associates with visible tattoos or piercings other than normal ears. I go a little further, and ban earrings other than studs and most jewelry for safety reasons. And belly rings, which I will <em>never</em> see, must be bandaided to prevent the live merchandise from getting a toe caught in the sales associate’s navel ring.</p>

19

<p>When I see a person with piercings (other than simple earrings) or significant tattooing, I find it distasteful. If I see this in a food establishment especially, I am put off. I do not express my distaste to the person–why would I? I am not an employer, but if I was, I would never hire such a person because I would suspect others are repulsed the same way I am. </p>

<p>These are fashions. I don’t understand why someone would deface their body for a fashion which may change in a few years, or which the person may come to regret.</p>

<p>I respect the right of an adult to get a tattoo or piercing, but I don’t think minors should go against their parents to get them, and I think it is unwise for college students to fight their parents over this until they are independent.</p>

20

<p>My daughter has had a small diamond chip in her nose since the age of 15. She could not work for the local grocery store chain, as that was “unseemly and unnatural”. Not a big deal as she found an excellent job as an intern for the city newspaper. That same grocery chain, without being able to see a photograph, granted her a very generous, very competitive 4 year scholarship. So much for prejudice, eh?</p>

<p>She is now in her 4th year of the 5-year Physician Assistant program. For this year, the students shadow physicians one day a week and not one of them has asked her to remove the stud. She carries a clear plastic spacer just in case one doctor would ask her to remove it. During two summers and Christmas breaks she worked through a home healthcare agency taking care of a set of twins with cerebreal palsey. Again not an issue.</p>

<p>The only time the piercing has been a problem for her was when she needed an MRI. The dental surgeon who removed her wisdom teeth in November allowed her to keep it in during the paneramic xrays.</p>