Opinions/Advice/Criticism on College Essay?

<p>Anyone (preferably college students/grads) willing to read and give some advice, and/or opinions/criticism on my college essay? please let me know so I can PM it to you.
I would greatly appreciate it!</p>

<p>My sisters would be willing to do so off of my CC account if you'd like? One of them graduated from Wellesley and the other from Brown.</p>