Opinions Needed for My Essay (Jan 26th coming)

<p>Prompt: History books records the deeds of the great inventors, warriors, explorers, and artists, but the real fabric of society is determined by consumers and ordinary workers-not those who make, but those who use; not those who find, but those who settle; not those who fight, but those who repair the damage.</p>

<p>Assignment: What is more important to a society: the demands of consumers or the dreams of artist, discoverers, and inventors?</p>

<p>The progress of any civilization hinges on the revolutionary discoveries, inventions, and artistic creations made throughout the course of history of that particular civilization. Society will then have the opportunity through this progress to achieve intellectual, creative and personal growth. Thus the dreams of artist, discovers, and inventors determine the eventual and more lasting progress of civilization on multifaceted levels compared to the ephemeral effects of consumers’ demands on civilization’s progress.</p>

<p>Thomas Edison was a prolific inventor whose inventions literally gave new light in directing civilization’s progress. When Thomas Edison’s most meaningful dream was turned into reality by him through the birth of the long lasting light bulb, history was forever set into motion. The dependence of consumers on the ephemeral candles lights became a thing of the past. His dream of electric companies when turned into reality through the establishment of Edison Electric Light Company gave society the great progressive gift of uninhibited access to a new form of energy during that period. If Thomas Edison had not given reality or importance to his dreams, will today’s society be able to experience the luxury of lighting and electricity?</p>

<p>When Marie Curie discovered natural radioactivity through years of hard work and personal sacrifices for the sake of achieving her dream, her discovery paved the way for the revolutionary cancer therapy and a new branch of academics deemed nuclear physics. Before her discovery, death had been the most reigning option for those who became afflicted with cancerous cells. With Marie’s tenacity to turn her dream into reality through the discovery of radioactivity, suddenly a new option for treatment and a renewed hope to overcome the deadly cancer became available in the history of the medicine. Marie Curie’s discovery forever revolutionized the medical field through the progressive advent of x-rays and cancer therapies. Society was also presented with a new branch of academics for intellectual inquiry and discovery with the advent of nuclear physics. Thus, Marie Curie’s dreams brought unimaginable progress to civilization in both the field of academics and health care.</p>

<pre><code>While consumers in any era create and drive demands in many industries temporarily, it is the progressive dreams of artists, inventors, and discoverers that create the eventual acme of any civilization’s progress in history.
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<p>I feel there is something wrong here. How does my thesis sound? Not complete? Should I have talked about the consumers too?</p>

<p>You start off very strong, thesis was great. I was very impressed by your ideas. However, you lose your stride near the end, so try to expand on that conclusion.</p>

<p>But yea it might have helped if you contrasted your ideas of consumers in a third paragraph (i.e. although consumers tribute x to society, they lack y qualities blah blah they are ephermeral)</p>

<p>Skatj,
Thanks. And the 3rd paragraph idea was a good one!</p>