<p>
</p>
<p>When my in-laws were visiting from the opposite coast when the kids were toddlers, my step FIL refused to take his shoes off and he threw such a tantrum that he refused to come into the house and stayed in the back yard for almost an hour while my MIL frantically coaxed him in. I didn’t insist that he took his shoes off but he was someone who didn’t appreciate being told what to do.</p>
<p>^ We’d just bought a new home and spent hours scrubbing it from the previous owners who had pets. It was a very rainy day and my in-laws were stopping by to see the still empty house. I politely asked my MIL to remove her shoes (I’d just scrubbed the hardwoods and her shoes were wet and muddy). She made a very loud humph and said adults should not be told to take off their shoes and hightailed it back to the car. Floored I looked at my DH before I followed her out into the pouring rain saying please to come in, keep her shoes on, it wasn’t that important to me. She sat in the car refused to look at me, open the window, or acknowledge me. They left. I told my DH “remember who was the bigger person here”. I never, ever asked again. She never apologized or mentioned it. I continue to be the ‘bad guy’, she continues to pull stunts like this (like un-inviting us for Christmas Eve dinner just hours before), although they are not nearly as often.</p>
<p>
And if they tell people where they got the karaoke machine, you look like the bad guy because it appears that you charged them for it, even though you didn’t…
Takes all kinds as they say…</p>
<p>In our state, MOST folks do take shoes off nearly all the time. Many have cute signs at the front door reminding folks, “Thanks for taking your shoes off,” or something to that effect. Our floors are MUCH cleaner that way. It would appear extremely rude or unconscious for folks to walk into a home with their shoes or footwear on. Many of us wear zoris or rubber slippers for convenience or shoes that are easy to slip on and off when going to a house.</p>
<p>When I was a kid and walking around the house in socks, no shoes, my dad would frown at me and growl “put some SHOES on!” Fast forward a few decades; my parents are over at our house for dinner, and I am in socks, no shoes. My dad sees, frowns at me, growls to put some shoes on. I grinned and said “no way, my house, you take your shoes OFF!”<br>
ST: 1.<br>
ST’s dad: 0
(and no, I didn’t make him take his shoes off. Totally not his style. And we don’t care one way or another if people have their shoes on or off. It’s just so much fun to score one on your parents!)</p>
<p>It would never even occur to me to leave my shoes on at somebody elses home. I would just as soon touch a hot stove as walk into a house without taking off shoes. </p>
<p>Though, I must admit I have had guests who I wished WOULD have kept their shoes on… some peoples shoes are probably cleaner than their socks!</p>
<p>Some of my friends provide slippers or indoor shoes for guests who feel more comfortable with footwear on.</p>
<p>I didn’t grow up with the custom of removing shoes so it is never expected. I don’t have any friends or family members who require it either. Because it is not something I’m accustomed to, I have always considered it a bit “weird.”</p>
<p>Shoes on or off inside the house has been a hot topic of conversation (well, it’s rarely as polite as a conversation) on the GardenWeb boards for years.</p>
<p>Like SlitheyTove, as a child I was constantly reprimanded about going barefoot at home. Going barefoot, to my parents, seemed to mean that one was both poor and without a proper upbringing. As a young adult, I happily went barefoot in my own homes as did the rest of my family. Then, plantar fasciitis, stress fractures, bunion surgeries, etc., made wearing shoes a requirement all of the time. Unsupportive slippers or flip-flops would not work for me.</p>
<p>I’ll understand if it’s a firm rule at someone’s home, I just hope they warn me when issuing an invitation so I can politely decline.</p>
<p>I tend to go barefoot outside and wear shoes inside - both behaviors annoy my husband, lol!</p>
<p>It’s definitely not a firm rule and I have never asked a non family member. It’s long past asking family. They know what we prefer, they either take them off or don’t. When the kids were much younger and had friends over I’d ask them to take their shoes off, but not past elementary school. No one ever complained (child or parent) and if they didn’t want to it certainly wouldn’t be a deal breaker.</p>
<p>In our area, we learned the habit from the kid’s friends, as they arrived ALL of them just took their shoes off, it became a family habit, though I don’t care if someone wears shoes</p>
<p>When I took my shoes off, my mom would say, “I’m not dead yet!” Meaning…Jews take their shoes off when in mourning. Interesting how one might think I was being rude and I am trying to be respectful!</p>
<p>"Then, plantar fasciitis, stress fractures, bunion surgeries, etc., made wearing shoes a requirement all of the time. Unsupportive slippers or flip-flops would not work for me.</p>
<p>I’ll understand if it’s a firm rule at someone’s home, I just hope they warn me when issuing an invitation so I can politely decline"</p>
<p>I can’t imagine anyone inviting you over and discussing their shoes on/off preference when they invite you, that would be rude.</p>
<p>I hope, since it is important to you, that if you’re invited to someone’s house for the first time, that you ask them. And also bring along a pair of shoes that you only wear indoors. It would be unfortunate for a shoes issue to ruin a good time at a friends house, or prevent you from visiting.</p>
<p>"Have just been informed by a relative that I am a bad guest. I followed my mom & dad to the TV room at a dinner, where they proceeded to watch the volleyball game while eating dinner. The hostess later complained that I ALWAYS disobey her specific request to join the dining room (which generally doesn’t have enough space) or eat other than on carpetted areas. I was floored. My mom was also shocked, as neither she nor I had ever heard her say that we are NOT to eat in carpeted areas</p>
<p>I profusely apologized to her and told her I had NO IDEA that she didn’t want anyone to eat on her carpeted area, but was just unconsciously following mom & dad to eat. Sheesh. She went on for about 15 minutes about how I ALWAYS disobey her house rule when I KNOW it upsets her"</p>
<p>It sounds to me like she either has a screw loose, or that she doesn’t like you in particular? Are you, perhaps, the successful family with well adjusted kids, and there are some jealousy issues? Funny how sometimes relatives feel entitled to treat others rudely, just because they are related. Seems like they ought to be nicer to family. I honestly can’t imagine dictating to people in my home where they should eat, especially if there are many people milling about, looking for space. Eat where you want, the dogs will eat the crumbs if they fall!</p>
<p>We don’t wear outdoor shoes inside the house, but I wouldn’t put that on an invite.</p>
<p>We wear either socks (clean!) or house-shoes. I don’t like bare-feet on carpets because of the oils from the feet make any carpets/rugs dirty.</p>
<p>Only our invitation instructed us to also bring $10 (per guest, incuding children) towards the karaoke machine (which they had borrowed from us</p>
<p>lol…We’re you tempted to call them and say something like:</p>
<p>“oh, please don’t think we are going to charge you for borrowing our machine. So, please tell your guests that they don’t need to bring any money for that.”</p>
<p>I hate shoes. So do both of my parents. We’re just as happy to go barefoot outside as we are with shoes. Inside, they go off the instant we get in. </p>
<p>Wearing shoes inside has always been a pet peeve of my mom’s. She’s always insisted that people take them off or change into other ones. We’re not neat freaks by any stretch of the imagination (my mom is the most “clean” but she can let most things go), however she hates when people track mud or anything around the house. Our dog is the only one that gets a pass lol. </p>
<p>I guess it just makes sense to me to take off your shoes. Why track dirt? hmm… </p>
<p>OTOH, my dad’s best friend has terrible arthritis and always brings/wears house shoes. That’s fine. Just wear different shoes. I don’t know why anyone would have a problem with CLEAN (indoor only) shoes in their house (although I’m sure they exist).</p>
<p>I have been yelled at more than once for taking off my shoes when going to someone’s house. It’s such a hard habit to break.</p>
<p>This is so interesting. In my entire life, I have never once been asked to take off my shoes, nor have any of my hosts been shoeless in their home while hosting a gathering! It wouldn’t bother me if someone asked me to remove my shoes, but so far it has never happened.</p>
<p>We have hardwoods throughout my home. I am trying to imagine my grandmother’s reaction to a request to take off her shoes, since she has mobility problems and always wears rubber soled shoes so as not to slip and fall. Nope, not happening.</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>Unfortunately, the dog refuses to wear shoes. 
:)</p>
<p>The carpet cleaning guy always has to spend a lot of time on the area right near the kitchen. That’s where the dog spends most of his time hanging out.</p>
<p>New definition of chutzpah: asking the people who loaned you the karaoke machine to pay $10 per person towards the karaoke machine.</p>