<p>Do any of you have a serious tendancy to overreact to situations? How do you deal with it?</p>
<p>I find that I have a very hard time when things are going on that I don’t have control over. I tend to get upset, and sometimes start to invent that things are going on that really aren’t. </p>
<p>Do any of you have troubles with his, and how do you tone down your level of reaction?</p>
<p>“Never attribute to malice what can be explained by ignorance, incompetence or stupidity.”
Hanlon’s Razor</p>
<p>or:</p>
<p>“If you can keep your head while all those around you are losing theirs and blaming it on you, if you can trust yourself when all men doubt you, …”
Rudyard Kipling</p>
<p>Life is a lot easier if you accustom yourself to mentally drawing a basic decision tree, assigning probabilities and outcomes, and pruning off the non-important branches. Think how you think ahead in chess. </p>
<p>When things don’t work the way you planned, a) you’re aware of the possibility at least and b) you hopefully have options. </p>
<p>It’s not unlike playing video games. You always want to (a) plan your next steps, not simply wonder around a level aimlessly (b) keep track of your resources and (c) have an exit plan from the level / castle / cave / etc you’re in. </p>
<p>I find that I am rarely surprised by anything in life.</p>
<p>Yes!<br>
Mine stems from anxiety to most situations, but I believe my dh reactions stems from bad communications, he tends to react before listening to the whole story.</p>
<p>Self control, and teaching yourself to use techniques that slow your thought process and relaxation exercises are the best thing for me. </p>
<p>As far as inventing things in your head…ask yourself…what is the absolute WORST thing that could happen in the siuation and then realize that the probablility of that is very low. Remember ( although I KNOW it is hard…worrying is like a rocking chair, takes energy to move, but gets no where.)</p>
<p>You are not alone, but just know that being more positive will porovide more happiness.</p>
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<p>And the other thing to do with considering the worst thing that could happen is to plan what to do next. Then if the worst thing happens, you’re prepared to handle it.</p>
<p>OP - Yours is a common malady. Fortunately it’s one that can be addressed in a straightforward manner. You may want to start your journey by telling yourself, repeatedly, that getting upset solves nothing. In fact it usually makes things worse. When you get to “the other side” in a few years, you’ll find yourself solving problems that seemingly baffle most of the population.</p>
<p>Example: I was flying to San Diego a couple of years ago with two girls scheduled to compete in a tournament the following day. The flight was late in leaving NYC. All the way across the country the Attendants assured passengers that they would make their connecting flights in Phoenix … that the connecting flights were being held. But as the plane touched down it was announced that ALL the connecting flights had left, and passengers should arrange to be rebooked for travel the following day. No, there would be no hotel vouchers. I was PO’d of course, but quickly calmed myself down and began looking for other options. And because I did that, I was able to get the last three seats heading to San Diego that night. (They were on another airline, which graciously held the plane a few minutes so we could get to the gate.) Ours was also the last plane out of Phoenix that night, so I’m pretty sure everyone else was stuck there.</p>