In about a week, my mom will find out that great grandchild #8 is coming this summer, and she’ll want to make a tiny sweater (as she has for every single grandchild and great grands). So I am furiously trying to learn how to do that (I do not knit) , so I can help her, because she can’t retain the directions and without them, she forgets how to do it partway through a tiny sleeve. She has the muscle memory,still. More than anything, this makes me super sad. Like, go stand in the hall at the AL and take deep breaths. At Christmas she made it through a set of tiny hats for her dining table friends, and I left her some projects started but she got scared when she couldn’t continue. My mom not being able to knit is like the sun not coming up in the morning. (Local said “what do you mean she can’t knit? How can she not knit? ■■■ else does the world want to take from her”)
Yes, we knew things were worsening when my mom could no longer play the piano, write checks and read. Dad also could no longer follow a plot of any sort, though he had been an avid reader and had enjoyed attending plays. I’m so sorry @greenbutton! He was a retired judge that settled a ton of legal cases in his decade on the bench but had no idea what he watched when seeing an episode of “Judge Judy” and similar. It was very very sad for all of us. Also, when he got confused, his dominant emotion was anger.
Can anyone recommend a car that is comfortable for a long trip and provides easy entry and egress for seniors with mobility issues (bad knees and long legs)? I will be taking my parents on a six hour drive in a few weeks, and want to rent a car that will meet their needs. They both struggle mightily to get into and out of both my Elantra (not enough leg room, seats too low to make reaching to pull the door closed by themselves possible) and our CRV (stepping up to get in is an issue). I think a roomier sedan would be best, but would love to know if anyone has specific experience. Are there any minivans that don’t require much of a step up to get in?
Lexus sedans seem easy to get in and out. Our neighbors are both tall and leggy and have no issues fitting themselves easily in them.
I have always found minivans to offer the easiest entry and exit. Haven’t looked at any of the recent ones to know which still have the lowest entry.
Have you considered a swivel cushion? I will say that I have no issues getting in and out of my CRV but hate getting in and out of husband’s Audi, especially if I have to step right onto a curb.
My SIL got an old minivan for my almost 91 year old FIL. He hadn’t been able to travel anywhere for years because it was too hard on him. They made it to the beach (4.5 hours away) in the van. It was easy to get in/out of, plus the captain chair’s seat can recline like a bed. I’m not sure what kind it is. I want to say a Chevy. It’s like 20+ years old and butt ugly, but it works.
It might be hard to find a rental Lexus (or it could be expensive). Lincoln cars are popular with the older generation apparently. We had one full size sedan as a rental, and my husband commented how cushioned and roomy the seats were.
Turo may have lexus sedans. Agree Lincoln Town cards look pretty roomy.
Chrysler Pacifica is the new version of a minivan. Should be easier to rent
My Subaru Outback is easy to get in and out of but I’m not sure it’s a car that I see at Enterprise
We have a bit of experience getting elders in and out of a car. My fil could not get into the back seat and closing the car door was always an issue no matter what kind of car. Both my in laws seem to have trouble with their seat belts, I’m not sure there is a remedy for some of the issues
You may wish to look into an aid like the “handy bar” or similar that you can put into the locking part of the car when the door is open (and remove before closing door). It gives the person who is having difficulty getting in & out of car something to hold onto in getting in and out of the car. It’s on Amazon, Home Depot and many places. The occupational therapist recommended it to help mom when she was getting in and out of all our vehicles. She seemed to have an easier time getting in and out of our sedans than other vehicles. YMMV.
Good idea. My father really likes his device (similar to link) for helping him in out of car
3 in 1–One product but multi-function: L
Hopefully you find a good car. Be aware that model is not always guaranteed at rental agencies. I suppose if you do Turo (rental from car owner), you definitely do know exact vehicle.
When I was tending my parents, particularly my frail, short-ish mother (who was in a wheelchair), the height of the mini-van made all the difference. I could wheel her up and she could back herself directly onto the front seat without fanfare, allowing me to easily lift her legs in and not reach far to help buckle her in. The ducking into our sedan was far less smooth and rapidly became impossible. We kept the van longer than we might have to accommodate them.
Interesting. It’s less difficult to get MIL into the car that used to be hers (she gave it to SIL - older, big Buick) than it is to get her up into our Honda minivan. Because she doesn’t assist with moving her legs/feet at all, we stopped trying to get her into our vehicle … we’re afraid of hurting her and us.
Long ago my father and I were killing time in a Honda showroom while I was having oil changed in my car. The salesman said many of his older customers did like higher cars. As described above, the method he demonstrate was to back into the seat, then swing in the legs.
It is so variable person to person and perhaps by vehicle. I was surprised the minivan worked best for her as she was average height to begin with and had probably lost a couple of inches. Seniors’ challenges are often a moving target which doesn’t help. My father lived to 93 and the last couple of years required specialized transport as I couldn’t do it safely. Fortunately, there were a lot of care and activities available in-house at his CCRC and he rarely needed to leave.
How to Prevent Aging Parents and Relatives From Making Financial Mistakes
Getting family members to listen to you when you think they are headed down a dangerous financial path can be difficult. But there are preventive steps you can take.
gift link https://www.nytimes.com/2026/01/18/business/aging-parents-finances.html?unlocked_article_code=1.FVA.Ok_q.Jv3kmQ52Octw&smid=url-share
When caregivers also offer “light housekeeping”, what kind of tasks are covered?
This link has a good explanation: What Tasks Are Considered “Light Housekeeping”? When Do You Need To Hire A Cleaning Service? - Collier Home Care. My MIL made sure it included weekly linen changes on her bed, because she wasn’t able to do that (but she did her own wash).