I live in the midwest and while I have nothing against it I dream of going to the ivy league, stanford, oxford, etc. I have the grades and the out of school leadership experience to have a great shot at them, but my parents don’t want me going anywhere I couldn’t commute to from home. They’ve sheltered me my whole life and I have to fight to do anything that involves me leaving the house. This led me to have no friends and the only things I’ve ever gotten are things that would help my chances at a good college. I want to leave so badly, but they don’t want me to go. I don’t need their money so that’s no issue, but I don’t want to hurt them. How can I convince them to let me go to a good school?
“I don’t need their money so that’s no issue”
You have $300,000+ of your own money to spend on college?
No but with their financial situation they wouldn’t have any money to contribute anyway. They saved no money for college for me at all and I qualify for tons of financial aid.
If you truly don’t need their money, wait till you are 18 and you can do as you please. If you do need a bit of help, I’d play up the prestige angle, as you seem to indicate that school-related stuff is the only place where they allow some slack
You need their signatures on your future FAFSA forms; you need to have a mature talk with your parents.
It’s fine to dream, but the places you mentioned admit very few of their applicants.
However, if you have the grades and test scores that would make you a viable applicant, there are other places where you would have a good chance of admission - often with significant merit-based aid. Start here:
http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/financial-aid-scholarships/1678964-links-to-popular-threads-on-scholarships-and-lower-cost-colleges.html#latest
All students qualify for is the federal student loan ($5500 as a freshman, $6500 as a soph, and $7500/year as a junior and senior). If parents income is low enough, they may also qualify for a Pell grant (up to ~$5k/year), but the parents have to fill out the FAFSA each year for the student to qualify for either. If your stats are high enough, you may qualify for merit aid at some schools.
I see on your other threads that you’re currently a freshman in high school. I can understand your parents being protective if you’ve been bullied to the point of leaving school, (falsely) accused of sexually harassing someone, and believe the principal changed your A grades to B’s. Right now, I think you need to concentrate on your finishing your current courses. Don’t worry about college yet. You still have time to sort that out. Good luck.
CollegeUn,
Its hard to believe, but 10 years from now, you will have graduated from college and will begin to realize your parents were not trying to control you, they were only trying to keep you at home a little bit longer. …
stay focused on your HS years and do all that you are capable of doing, without making yourself miserable.
And as for colleges- you have a LOT of time before you need to start thinking about where you will apply.
In 2 years, if you have top grades and test scores, start to seriously look for colleges that will pay you to go to college.
Dont focus on “prestigious” colleges, like so many misguided students.
Hoping or dreaming of acceptance at “dream schools” where 95%+ of applicants are rejected, is akin to the ancient saying " If wishes were horses then beggars would ride"
It probably wont happen.
Plan accordingly.
If you want to go away for college, you have to have top grades and scores, which means preparing well for the PSAT and either the ACT or the SAT as well as subjects, taking a rigorous course loads (mostly honors + 4-8APs over 4 years), and getting to state or national level in one or two areas of interest.
This way, you’ll be able to apply to “100% need” colleges*
- note that whether or not your parents saved doesn't matter, their EFC is EXPECTED contribution. Run the NPC on your state's flagship as well as on Bowdoin and look at the numbers.
You will need cooperation from your parents to get financial aid. If you are that low income and excellent stats, check out Questbridge.
In the midwest, of course, Chicago and Northwestern (among other universities) meet your academic/stature dreams AND may also be close to home.
Are your parents low income??
Just because they don’t have college savings does NOT mean that they won’t be expected to pay for some of your college costs.
Anyway…you will not get a DIME of financial aid if your parents won’t let you go away to school because they WON’T fill out the FA forms.
You are only a frosh in high school, so right now your parents can’t imagine you going away to college. WAIT and see how they’ll feel once you’re 17/18 (do NOT graduate early, that will just complicate things).
In the meantime, behave in a MATURE manner and don’t give them reasons to think that you’re too immature to go away.
BTW…you may qualify for a “lot of FA,” but unless your family is low income, they will still be expected to pay.
And…great grades aren’t enough for top schools, you’ll also need top test scores and ECs.
Don’t be afraid to compromise. You need your parents more than you think. You are young. Wait a couple years and see how they feel. It may be they are emotional about you leaving especially if you are the oldest/only child. Staying close can be not all mad. Even if you are 2 or 3 hours away, you don’t have to go home often. My friend’s brother goes 1 1/2 hours away and besides breaks has been home 0 times.