Parents, how do I deal with the physical symptoms of STRESS?

Parent Cafe
1

<p>Like most kids on CC, I have a busy schedule and a demanding courseload. I’ve usually thought that I’m fairly good about effectively dealing with stress, but I’m not so sure about that anymore. For the past year, I’ve had heart palpitations and heartburn – annoying, but not inconvenient or serious. Recently, those symptoms have stopped and a new one started: nausea. No, I haven’t actually barfed, but probably 3-4 times/week I feel like I could…and it’s all I can do to keep from doing so sometimes. I have actually considered leaving class lectures or finding a discreet way to step off the front platform in church while singing in the choir – it’s that bad (btw – I never get stage fright). Sometimes this is accompanied by dizziness – not intense, but bad, nonetheless, in combination with the nausea.</p>

<p>Today I was at school tutoring after class. I felt fairly relaxed for most of it, except a couple times waves of nausea started to come over me, upon which I tried to focus on other stuff. Then something happened that has never happened to me before: my arms started going numb. They didn’t go completely numb, but it was like I could feel a subset of neurons being shut off. Of course, I panicked and began breathing rapidly, but I tried to maintain composure as I talked to a student I was helping. Several minutes later, the nauseous feeling came over me, and I couldn’t stand it, so I excused myself to use the restroom. (Don’t worry, nothing <em>gross</em> happened). I was panicking more than anything, so I thought, “Find someone who can make you feel unstressed.” Truthfully, I was most afraid of these symptoms getting worse and no one knowing what to do (of course, I was thinking, “paralysis, death, blood clots”). So I went to the office of one of my most trusted teachers, explained (panickedly!) my symptoms, and she immediately said she thought I might be hyperventilating, so she had me breathe into a paper bag for awhile. Being the prepared one that she is, she went through her first-aid folder and quizzed me on symptoms. She finally wound up walking me up to the student health services on campus, and I saw a nurse, who said it was probably stress-related and that I should make a note of what situations trigger it.</p>

<p>Now this advice was all well and good, but how should I deal with these physical symptoms of stress/anxiety? I think it feeds on itself. I take comfort in the fact that I know that nothing is likely physically WRONG with me, but these symptoms are real and scary.</p>

<p>Any advice?</p>

2

<p>I hate to be rude, but is there any possibility you’re pregnant? That’s a common reason for nausea and dizziness.</p>

3

<p>Nope, definitely not. (but worth asking!)</p>

4

<p>Avalon - I am glad you saw the school nurse, but I do think you should see a doctor to have a complete physical and more definitively rule out physical causes.</p>

<p>That said, stress is something we all experience. Some suffer more from it than others. Some have headaches, some ulcers, some backaches, some racing heart, etc., etc., etc. You are wise to think about ways to manage your stress. There are many and here are some beginning thoughts. See what works for you. [ul][<em>]Physical exercise - I am thinking both of regular, planned exercise whether it’s walking, jogging, swimming or whatever. I am also thinking of a physical activity you can retreat to at the moment you are feeling the anxiety. This will vary depending on where and when it happens - could be stretching, one lap around a track, one “lap” around the school halls, etc. [</em>] “square” breathing - inhale for a 5-count, hold for a 5-count, exhale for a 5-count, hold for a 5-count. Increase the count to longer and longer. This can slow and steady your breathing, especially helpful if you tend to hyperventilate, but can be calming in any event; [<em>] meditation [</em>] visualization - think of a peaceful, favorite place you have been, and allow yourself to picture yourself there, building great detail into the mental picture; give yourself several minutes to do this [<em>]body relaxation techniques - one-by-one, starting with your toes and feet - tense each muscle and relax it; work your way up your whole body tensing and relaxing[</em>]have a relaxing warm drink, such as hot cocoa[/ul] There are many techniques and I’m sure others will suggest them.</p>

<p>Now - while it is important to learn to manage stress because IMHO some stress is inevitable, it is also important to think about whether you are subjecting yourself to too much stress. Is your schedule too hectic - should you drop some items? Are you busy with things you truly love, or are too many of your activities self-imposed or imposed by others because you think you need to do them? Are you expecting too much of yourself in terms of grades/accomplishments?</p>

<p>You already have some wonderful coping skills in that you have a trusted teacher and were willing and able to go to her. If you are lucky, there is a school social worker on your campus - there is an excellent one at my S’s former high school - who is trained and skilled in this area. I suggest you consult him or her. If there is not such a person, seek out a mental health professional in your community. He or she can help you sort out whether you will benefit from simple “stress-reducing” techniques, or whether you need to eliminate some sources of stress in your life.</p>

<p>Hope a little of this is helpful. Keep us posted.</p>

5

<p>Avalon:</p>

<p>Do you have regular meals, especially breakfast? It might help with the nausea and dizziness. There are relaxation exercises you could do; massage can also help.<br>
Engaging in some pop-psychology here, but you should consider confronting the source of your stress. Are you overworked? Then try to prioritize and limit your activities. Are you a perfectionist (and hence overworked)? Try to overcome your perfectionism. Are you nervous about the college application process? Try to work out a schedule, make sure you have a reasonable list of schools you would be happy to attend and trust in yourself and in fate. There may be other reasons for you to be stressed: financial concerns, worry about leaving home, etc… Be realistic about your abilities, your resources and your goals, and have faith in yourself. Things do work out in the end. Best of luck!</p>

6

<p>I cross-posted with jmmom; she has more detailed tips than I have. Great!</p>

7

<p>Avalon-Jmmom has given you some great advice for dealing with stress and she is definitely right that your first course of action needs to be to see a doctor and rule out physical causes. Don’t diagnose yourself-make an appointment with your physician. Good luck.</p>

8

<p>Jmmom’s advice is exactly what I would provided. What you likely had is what are called “panic attacks”. About 8% of the population gets them at one time or another. They can be brought on by stress, but, be forewarned, not always, or inevitably, and they can bounce up when least expected. Some folks believe that having them once or a few times makes it more likely you’ll have them in the future - brain-wiring and all. </p>

<p>At any rate, the only addition I’d make to Jmmom’s list is walking backwards around the block, anything to focus energy elsewhere, especially physically is a good thing.</p>

<p>And do get checked out by a doc.</p>

9

<p>Seconding (Thirding?) the doctor visit. Along with the emotional causes, there are plenty of physical causes – hormone fluctuation (that’s what causes it in pregnancy, but you don’t have to be pregnant to have hormones off-balance!), dehydration, blood sugar problems…</p>

10

<p>I would agree that a doctor visit to rule out anything else is a really good idea.<br>
I have had the same issues with nausea and stress, and I’ll agree that it is no fun. Try to eat or drink something even if you feel like you can’t keep anything down…I found that to help get rid of the nausea a lot, especially on days when I woke up feeling crummy.
In the long term, find something that allows you to release stress that you enjoy…music can be really good for this. I know that playing music throughout high school was the only thing that kept me sane.</p>

11

<p>Obviously go to the doctor for a checkup. But you could change your diet to help with some of the heartburn or nausea you are feeling. Maybe limit caffiene, if your heart seems to be racing. Eat small meals more frequently through the day…try for healthy snacks. But also don’t gobble down your food in a rush…eat slowly and chew carefully. Consider whether your food is overly spicy or with too much seasonings that could encourage heartburn to develop.
If you do have heartburn, don’t hesitate to take a TUMS tablet or some chewable antacid. They wont’ hurt you and will give you some relief (hopefully!)
AND please see your doctor!</p>

12

<p>Thanks, everyone, for your words of advice. I think my mom’s making a doctor’s appointment for Friday.</p>

<p>This morning I had physiology lecture at 7:45. As my mom was driving me to school, I started feeling a little queasy, but I thought, “I’ll be fine.” Well, it wasn’t too far into lecture that I started to feel really BAD. My teacher kept using the word “regurgitate” (“I want you to understand the material, not merely regurgitate it on a test.”), which didn’t help (retrospectively, it would have been mortifyingly hilarious had I actually thrown up then and there). It got to the point where I couldn’t concentrate enough to take notes from the PowerPoint. About two-thirds of the way through lecture, I guess I must have looked pretty pathetic, since the teacher actually stopped lecturing and asked me, “Are you all right?” Soon after that I left the room to <em>use the restroom</em> (again, nothing gross, which was actually not very cool – I still felt lousy). I came back to class, and my friends (sitting in the row behind me) wondered what was going on. So lots of note-passing. After lecture, I thought I should tell my teacher, so I stood in the front of the room for a few minutes while some other students talked to her. I was last “in line” and she asked, “What’s wrong?” I basically started crying and briefly told her what’s going on. She had to give another lecture, but she asked me to swing by her office afterwards.</p>

<p>I was in no physical shape to go to my math class, and I ran into my math teacher, so I told him I wasn’t feeling well and wouldn’t be in class (he was cool with that). At this point, I thought, “I really need to talk to someone,” so I went to another teacher’s office (Mrs. S – some of you may remember her from a post awhile back). More crying, and she was really understanding. She actually talked with me for about an hour, and I think got to the heart of the matter with stress and everything. She echoed what several of you said about perfectionism. Obviously she said much more in that hour that I’m not writing here, but you get the idea. She had to get some work done, but she said I could sit in her office as long as I wanted. So I did – read a little, napped a little. My physio teacher (Ms. P) came back from her lecture, and I talked to her for some time – similar conversation to the one with Mrs. S. Upon both of their suggestions, I called my mom to come pick me up. The three of us actually went outside and walked around for half an hour and talked (ok, so they got something to eat and I averted my gaze from the food!), and then my mom came and picked me up at noon (and I’m skipping physics lecture AND lab, but I feel no guilt).</p>

<p>So now I’m at home, just trying to figure out how to handle this. I guess I had my “official” emotional meltdown today (the physical one started yesterday and – I hope – ended this morning) and realized that this is indeed a stress issue.</p>

<p>Not to act all perfectionistic, but, in terms of college admissions and teacher recs, this is likely the worst time for something like this to happen. But maybe not, at least considering who my teachers are. They know I’m human, and it isn’t as if they haven’t been warning me about burnout for some time – I wonder if they saw something like this coming. I’ll just have to eloquently say something when I bring up writing recs either tomorrow or early next week (I was originally going to ask today but that clearly didn’t happen).</p>

<p>So thank you again. This process will take time, but I think I can overcome this stress. I just hope I can overcome the nausea!</p>

13

<p>I know your mom will be concerned. I hope she arranges a full physical for you–to rule out physical causes. </p>

<p>Does your teacher think your school counselors are worthwhile? I wonder if you might be struggling with underlying depression… Talking to a professional might be very helpful.</p>

14

<p>Sometimes stress can lead to physical problems - you mentioned the nausea, and you also mentioned heartburn. Sometimes an ulcer in the stomach or esophogas, or even GERD can cause these symptoms. Irregular eating (because of stress, or dieting) can bring on this type of thing and cause a chronic problem - but it can be easily treated with medication.
That’s just one possible physical cause - so it’s very important that you see the doctor to get help for the physical symptoms, as well as trying to understand the emotional causes. Good luck, sweetie.</p>

15

<p>Wonderful advice. Reflux is very real, and you can feel like your food is coming back up. All the relation exercises (deep breathing) will help, as well as slow eating, lots of fluids.
Make sure you discuss with MD the numb feeling in arms. It is possible that you are holding stress in neck area and the nerves are effected.
Its beneficial to talk to a professional for at least a few sessions. Talking thru problems can decrease the way stress manifests itself in somatic ways.
good luck</p>

16

<p>Avalon I hope you feel better soon! Let us know how the doctors appointment goes.</p>

17

<p>Thanks for your comments and care! I went to the doctor on Friday, and she’s very familiar with the stresses that college apps, etc. can bring about. She thought stress is probably the sole culprit of my symptoms, so at least I know I can deal with it.</p>

<p>Thursday actually was a lot better than Tuesday and Wednesday. I felt a little “blah” in the morning, but it was overall nice. In the afternoon, I was tutoring someone in math, frustrated like crazy because this student wasn’t getting it, but I couldn’t help but think, “I am so happy.” I stopped by Mrs. S’s office that afternoon, and she commented that I looked a lot better. Oh yeah, I got around to what I thought would be a super-awkward request for a rec in light of Wednesday. She immediately agreed – “Of course,” she said. “My opinion of you hasn’t changed.” :)</p>

<p>Funny story: So of course I (jovially) told Ms. P on Wednesday that I didn’t appreciate her using the word “regurgitate” over and over again. On Thursday morning, before the start of class, I briefed my lab group on what was going on (just in case…lol). Well, what do you know, Ms. P hands out a quiz (first one of the semester), we take it, and she says, “So now you know that you need to understand the material in depth, not regurgitate it to me.” With that, she looked nervously at me, and my lab group just giggled. “Uh, ‘recite it back to me,’” she said. My response?: “Thank you.” ;)</p>

18

<p>Avalon:</p>

<p>Nice to know you keep your sense of humor! I’m glad to read that you are coping better.</p>