Parents of the high school class of 09

Parents Forum
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<p>northeastmom: I guess since this isn’t a school specific thread, it doesn’t matter if I mention the schools. It’s not as if I haven’t posted about them previously:). Her first choice is American University, second choice is University of Richmond. Both schools cost the same, UR is simply able to offer a little more aid.</p>

<p>I am very curious why you suggest AU, if in fact we are speaking of the same schools? I do have some reservations about UR, always have. I am very interested what DD will decide. I had her call me between classes just awhile ago to tell her the scenario. I want her to be thinking about it, talking to any teachers, friends, coach,etc. that she may feel it necessary to consult with.</p>

<p>The $25k or so that DD would need to take out in loans is the portion that we don’t have covered with AU grants, my college savings, and a promise from grandfather of a minimum contribution. The $25k MIGHT be taken off her hands at the end of college by grandfather if he feels it is possible. I agree, $25k in subsidized stafford loans is a reasonable amount of debt, but, it’s still an aditional sum of $$$ that she wouldn’t need to borrow if she went to UR. Grandfather will be kicking in a little more than anticipated if she chooses AU, again not a problem, but we still have two more kids going off to college next year. </p>

<p>I’m fine with her decision either way. I just want her to be happy with her choice. She has said to me a couple of times…“I guess I can always transfer from UR if I don’t like it”. That makes me very concerned that she would be entering UR without really committing to it. That is kind of a sad start in my opinion:(. At least if she ultimately decides to go to UR it will be with the knowledge that it is entirely her choice, not only a financial fallback decision. I have yet to see the unabashed excitement with her decision that I expected to see.</p>

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<p>Yes, those were the 2 schools that I thought you were weighing. I just sent a PM to you.</p>

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<p>Is no one else’s state/school district/community reacting insanely to the swine flu threat? The middle school choir boys were going to attend a baseball game. Event cancelled. Choir still competing next week but they have to sit on the bus whenever they aren’t competing. Seems like they stand a much greater chance of catching something cooped for hours on a bus with their classmates than if they sat in a large auditorium. To the extent the world made sense before today, it no longer does.</p>

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<p>ksabbo, do both schools guarantee housing for all 4 years? </p>

<p>Remember if room & board is not on your tuition bill, numbers in financial aid packages can drastically change. So my point is that if later on there is an off campus apartment to pay for, you will be paying rent, groceries etc for your child. And you will be receiving a reduced financial aid package, room & board is running about 10-11K now, so that will not be on your tuition bill. Sometimes I think that it is easy to get overwhelmed by the numbers that are in play now, but you have to think about all 4 years! </p>

<p>If housing is not guaranteed for all 4 years, it may be possible to become a CA/RA or whatever they call them these days & get some room & board paid for. But the student has to apply for a CA/RA position & might not be selected.</p>

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<p>** SLUMOM: do both schools guarantee housing for all 4 years? **</p>

<p>Thanks for pointing this out. I’m looking into it as soon as I post this message. This is why I HATE this last minute stuff. If I wasn’t rushed, we would have already been on top of this kind of stuff.</p>

<p>If anybody thinks of anything else we need to be aware of, PLEASE post.</p>

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<p>Schools will still offer FA for R&B if you live off-campus – it won’t be the same number as on-campus rates, but they do take that into account, esp. if you are living off campus vs. being a commuter student (i.e., living at home).</p>

<p>In S1’s case, it would be cheaper to live off campus, as he doesn’t eat enough to make the meal plan worthwhile!</p>

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<p>ksabbo: If my experience is any indicator, the FA awards have gone up slightly each year and definitely matched the increases in tuition.</p>

<p>D has about 12K in debt which we plan to pay off for her. I think I can handle the monthly payments because I won’t have to pay for her.</p>

<p>S will have 2K because his school went loan free.</p>

<p>What are your reservations about URichmond? Does D smile a whole lot more for American?</p>

<p>My D would have taken on the 25K for her time at Barnard. The city has really been a totally separate educational experience that she wouldn’t have gotten anywhere else. Mt. Holyoke gave her a bigger aid package, but her heart was with Barnard. </p>

<p>You should look at the 25K and see the payoff amts in terms of monthly payments and number of years. You may find that you can help her a bit too.</p>

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<p>Not a great time to be battling the computer viruses I’ve had the past two weeks! One computer is DEAD for all practical purposes. It’s given me limited time here–it’s kind of hard to post from my iphone…</p>

<p>Congrats on all the decisions! It does give me a little twinge of envy as I read about the places your children will go that I wished D applied or considered more seriously: American, Wooster, Marquette, Clemson, etc. </p>

<p>I suspect a lot of schools are worried about yield. D has received a piece of mail (or two) from one particular school every day. I kind of wish we had hit up another school for more money, but her decision was made weeks ago when the reality of the economy, etc. hit us. </p>

<p>D looked very elegant at her prom last weekend and had a great time! Traditionally Seniors skip the Monday after prom. She decided to go to school because of one particular class (and the teacher didn’t do what she said she would do) and skip with her friends from another school on another day. She rarely misses school so we are fine with this. She came home though expecting I would make her start working on announcements. I’m not there yet, but she only has 19 days of high school left and graduates in exactly a month. </p>

<p>Again–lots of big toasts and congrats to all the wonderful 09’ers and parents on CC!!!</p>

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<p>some schools give additional $ after certain amt credits obtained and certain GPA earned. Does any of you r schools do this?</p>

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<p>mythmom: Reservations about UR…the enormous amount of wealth at the school is very apparent. During the “admitted students day” one of the visitors questioned UR’s reputation of being “J Crew U”. The admissions rep jumped in to answer this question before one of the students could, and basically said, “we’re working on it, right along with our diversity issues”.</p>

<p>Also, during both visits, we barely saw any students milling about the campus. The second visit was on a gorgeous day! The sun was out and there were only a handful of students laying out in the sun on the lawn. They were almost all girls and they all had on cute little sun dresses (the girls, that is:) ). NOBODY was ever in a UR t-shirt/sweatshirt and shorts/jeans, except the campus guides…and that was their uniform.</p>

<p>Over on the UR threads, there are only about 4-5 students answering questions. I’m not knocking those students…thankfully, they are there to answer questions. However; UR Admissions checks in on the threads to see if there are any questions that they can answer, or at least find somebody to provide answers. This is all very nice and good, except…it also leaves me to wonder if students refrain from participating because admissions may know who they are. There is never a negative word mentioned about UR, it’s unsettling. I ended up leaving an…ahem… not so tactfull message begging some students to participate in the threads. I clearly offended one/some of the students who WERE participating (totally not my intention), but FINALLY students began answering the questions. Still the same 4-5 students though.</p>

<p>Lastly, I didn’t see any FUN at the campus. The answers I received when I questiond this aspect were…“the students are too busy”, and “they’re preparing for exams”. This may ALL be true, but it was again, unsettling.</p>

<p>With that being said, AU was very different in our single visit. We didn’t go back for admitted students day though, because we didn’t believe it was really an option. My daughter is much more familiar with DC. It’s only about 60-90 minutes from home and she loves DC. AU has a much more casual atmosphere. Another BIG thing about AU is that the cross country/track coach is actively recruiting D to run for them. Not for scholarship $$, but as a walk-on. UR coach hasn’t responded to multiple emails and phone messages.</p>

<p>And to answer your question…AU makes my D smile. UR draws a nervous little half smile from her. I will be shocked if she doesn’t choose AU.</p>

<p>Anybody who has kids going to UR…Please understand these are my opinions only. Your experiences and opinions may be very different, and rightly so. We all have certain personality traits that respond better to certain situations/influences.</p>

<p>Finally, it doesn’t matter what I think about all this:D. It’s my D’s final decision. And, yes, I hope to be able to help her pay off any debt she takes on for college. I simply can’t promise that to her just now. Again, two more kids to get into college next year. Also, I’m a Realtor and have been hit very hard by the economy, just like many others I’m sure.</p>

<p>Sorry for the exceptionally long post, and thank you to everybody for being so helpful and supportive:)</p>

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<p>I also think the unabashed excitement does not kick in until the decision is made, and plans start.</p>

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<p>Is she going to study something that being in DC with the internships would be helpful.?
Some jobs after college have loan forgiveness programs. Perhaps (God Willing) the economy will be better. I know we need to focus on the here and now, but it may be a consideration.</p>

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<p>ksabbo: Yes, I understand every single post you made. Wow. I am surprised about the dress. Maybe the south is different. Even at Barnard in the middle of NYC the women wore mostly jeans.</p>

<p>Yes, my H is a wedding photographer who had been very affected by the economy.</p>

<p>You have my sympathy. You really do. Life is very difficult sometimes.</p>

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<p>Myth, at my southern flagship, everyone dressed up for the football games. We’re talking ultra-preppy w/blazers (to hide the flasks) and pearls. For class, Izod shirts, plaid knee-length shorts and/or flourescent wraparound skirts w/whales, fish, frogs or other critters were typical. The louder the colors and patterns, the better. </p>

<p>I had a roommate one year who got up at 5:30 am to get ready for an 8:00 class. And I’m not talking about academic preparation! :eek:</p>

<p>Those of us in jeans and t-shirts were definitely not the norm!</p>

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<p>ksabbo not sure where your D will decide to go. We have been very happy with AU. S is just finishing up his 3rd year there and still loves it.</p>

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<p>Poor D is so confused. She is hesitant to change her decision from UR to AU because she only saw AU once on a general campus visit. I can understand this. Luckily AU gave us an extension to May 15 to make our decision. The only downside is, our deposit will not be refunded from UR if she doesn’t make her decisoin before end of day tomorrow. Small price to pay though, when looking at the big picture. </p>

<p>I’m going to try to set up a day at AU where she can visit and drop in on a class, etc. This is a challenge in itself with all the activities she is dealing with…senior stuff, end of track season, etc. I’m very surprised she isn’t all over this opportunity. She told me, “it’s a shame there isn’t ANY school that I just fell in love with”… :frowning: My heart is breaking for her.</p>

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<p>Awwh! Is it that she talked herself out of AU, and started picturing herself at UR when the money did not show up in AU’s initial offer? I can definitely understand that. I would have rationalized why UR is really the best choice for me, and why AU is not really the best option. It is really all such confusion, and so stressful for seniors!</p>

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<p>I’m not really sure what is holding her back. She isn’t one to make snap decisions. She has much more patience than I do. She has to let things simmer.</p>

<p>Everybody in our house are runners. I feel like we are approaching the end of the marathon and wanting to just coast in. Now we have to gear up for yet another college visit, under severe time constraints…seems more like we are now at mile 19 of the marathon rather than mile 25 and coasting to the finish. Whew…I’m exhausted :)</p>

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<p>Just made hotel reservations for orientation/check-in and parents weekend (Sept. and Oct., respectively), thinking we can always modify later if needed. The first hotel I called was already booked!!</p>

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<p>Ksabbo - I believe many kids “fall in love” with the school once they meet their classmates. Whichever choice she makes, I’m sure she has the tools to succeed.</p>

<p>Is tomorrow “wear your college choice apparel” at many high schools tomorrow? It is here in my sleepy New England town and after months of practicing “don’t ask, don’t tell”, it will be a relief to many students to announce their intentions. Good thing the T-shirt arrived today…</p>