Parents of the HS Class of 2009 (Part 1)

Parents of HS Class of 20xx
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Congrats on the aerial show (Z) and the graduation (MP), and the upcoming celebration in WA (O101). How did the pie come out, FallGirl?

We played tourist Saturday night and did a sunset harbor cruise. It had been a warm day, so the breeze felt nice. It was lots of fun! On Saturday night at our complex (there are 5 buildings) it was “camp out night” for those who wanted to participate. For a fee residents (mainly families with kids) could camp out on the grounds. It was entertaining to see all the tents when I was up early Sunday walking the dog. FYI, pets are not allowed on the grounds. They are confined to the sidewalk/street. My dog hates getting his toes wet in the grass so that’s just fine with him.

H and D seem to be much more anxious about S than I am. H and D share the same personality, while S and I are more alike. Both H and D are very concerned about him lining up post-graduation plans (next year). When we saw him a few weeks ago he talked about teaching ESL after graduation as a way to see the world. I think it sounds fun and it’s exactly when you should do something like that. He’s researched where the best paid positions are. H wants him to apply to graduate programs, D thinks he’s doomed to be unemployed since he hasn’t had any internships. He had originally planned on getting one this summer but the study abroad program he’s in goes until the end of July. Maybe I should be more concerned, but he’s bright and he’s flexible and he’s very low maintenance.

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I hope graduation was wonderful MP.

The camp-out sounds fun, c_q – no urge to participate?

FallGirl – hope you enjoyed Pirates of Penzance. I am a total sucker for Gilbert & Sullivan. So clever.

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Good morning.
CQ, bright, flexible and low maintenance is likely one of the best sets of survival skills you can have today, right? :wink: I’m with you on this one! Your s has the rest of his life to work out all those other trappings of middle America :wink:

Kudos on the anniversaries, milestones, graduation, and sending mojo to the missy pie family for better traveling :wink:
Missy, how was the grad? I recall being very choked up about it all, though in mcson’s case it was more like post-traumatic stress syndrome :slight_smile:

Oregon I will trade you the party for the 150 people you don’t now for 150 I do :wink: This weekend will be a little weird for me – long story but though my BFF am involved in attending a party and reconciling with an old friend with whom I have some very not-fond memories…I’m okay with that part or I wouldn’t be dong it, but there’s a handful of others I’d have preferred to never see again, let alone to see them all at once :wink:

We had some sad news last week. My ex called mcson in the middle of the work day to share that he’d just found out he has colon cancer. Unfortunately, he had few other details about stage, operability, etc., so mcson is waiting on tenterhooks to find out more.

I realize he was freaked out and thought he should tell mcson immediately, but I must admit I wouldn’t have until I’d had a little more info…so of course, I wish he’d done the same. I’d made the mistake of saying as much, which caused mcson to lay one on me a bit about why wouldn’t I share that with him immediately, etc.

I think he now thinks I’m uber secretive and is wondering if he can trust me to tell him if I’m ever sick. The truth is I just wouldn’t until I had a little more info. My ex and I roll a bit differently that way.

At any rate, I just wanted to check in and say hi. I’ve been MIA a lot the last few months but its nothing personal :wink: Another forum I belong to has me helping the mods and there appears to be no shortage of folks who can’t manage their pools. But helping out has proven way more time consuming that I can really manage given my schedule, and helping out is eating up those few quiet hours I have in the ams.

My latest working theory is that if you don’t have your pool under control at this late date in the season, you might not be trainable :wink: hi ho.

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kmc, You are a brave woman. I doubt that I would have agreed to the party at all. But then, just nod and be polite far away from the refreshment table

Sorry to hear about your ex. I know that when we were going through our medical drama the last few years I had to demand that H not call D and S, or ask me to, until there was real information to share. Of course this agreement came after he had already called my GF. She is a very dramatic person so then I had to deal with her. I decided that some people need the sense of others when they are frightened and then some need to hunker down in their own emotional trenches.

I want a pool. I want a boat. I want a stream out my backdoor. I am looking for a new lot. We want to stay close in so what I just wished for is most likely never going to happen. But I can dream. Oh, but I do wnt to give up our view.

Garden has bolted and a lot of stuff except the tomatoes is either too big or tough. Our May was like our typical July.

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We want to get a new house in our little town that is a) contemporary or a tear-down (in a land full of Colonials that I generally detest); b) on the water; c) in walking distance to a town center; and d) with enough land to build a studio or alternatively, a smaller place in Cambridge. We found a house designed by Gropius’s architectural firm that has water and land, but is not in walking distance of much. We found an old fancy Colonial in a historic district (gadzooks) that is on water and is in walking distance. But, there is only a small probability of finding what we want. So, we are going to have to relax one of our constraints. There is are two other houses (renovated by ugly Colonials) – one on a large and beautiful pond and in walking distance of a town center with probably enough land though on a busy street and the other on 3.5 acres with several small ponds. ShawWife doesn’t want to see either. It may be a while before we move at this pace.

We’ve also thought about moving back to Cambridge. I kind of like the greenery, but there are nice elements – restaurants, friends, convenience to the airport etc. to compensate for the lack of greenery.

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Are you downsizing,shaw?

I’m so sorry to hear about your ex, kmc. And that has to be tough news for McSon.

Really enjoyed the show on Saturday. The weather turned out to be perfect! The pie turned out well. I would be a good cook if we could live on pie.

A group of us at work are volunteering at a food pantry tomorrow. Thursday is my work from home day and I am taking Friday off to go to NYC.

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Very sorry to hear about your ex, kmc.

FG, we are probably right-sizing. We actually have 5 bedrooms now – one of which is my home office. We minimally need 3 total but probably want 4 so the kids or others can stay. But, we have an arts and crafts home with a huge living room with a large fireplace and what our architect friends call a “perfect inglenook.” That room is rarely used. Plus, we would prefer a modern house all on one floor (maybe the extra bedrooms on the 2nd floor). And, we have a studio we built next to the house which we will have to build again (unless we move back to Cambridge as we still own a studio from the days we lived there). So, I think we could get rid of one room and but could use an even bigger DR as we entertain a fair bit.

Plus, we are going to rent a place in the Bay Area this winter. So, our real estate needs may be greater rather than smaller.

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We thought we would stay in this house until we physically couldn’t but now that the girls have settled in the area… about 15 minutes away…we are not sure we need this big house. We have four bedrooms but are only using one. We have so many living areas, too. We have a family room, a living room, a four season porch/sun room and a very large finished lower level where H entertains for poker and sports events. We have a huge wooded backyard and the upkeep close to the house takes quite a bit of energy, especially as we are at the lake home so much in the summer. H can’t believe I am even considering moving in 5+ years. Our deck replacement just started today! I think we will probably get things updated and find out it is time to sell!

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Shaw, when we stumbled across “the Death House” as we call it, it met our criteria of one floor, near water, natural setting, enough land for studio, guest/pool house etc. but main house right-sized and simple.

When I originally drove out to see it, I told mch no way would I ever want to live so far out of city center (its only 20 min., but I was thinking vehicle reliance and aging.)

I love the place and would not trade it for the world, but I realize that in years hence if one or both of us can’t drive, we’ll be snookered :wink:

Finding a cool, pastoral haven that has amenities within walking distance is like finding a purple unicorn around here…so I can appreciate your challenge :wink: But I’m reading “Being Mortal” right now and under its influence would say to hold out for walking-distance amenities!

I will either have to age REALLY well or go out in a blaze of glory for this to truly be my death house :wink:

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I thought Being Mortal was a great read and lots of things I hadn’t thought about. Living somewhere that is walkable is one that I had. I dislike driving (and it dislikes me). Walkability seems to be factoring big with the younger generation as well as ours.

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Morning all. I need some help for those in the know. :slight_smile:

Currently planning a trip with another couple for next March to California. The original plan was just a “let’s go to Napa”. Well we have to go during the school break because the other woman is a teacher so it will be in late March. That being said I don’t think that I can do 7 days of wineries and be happy. :slight_smile: I would like to propose some other things. My original thought was perhaps start up by the Redwood forest for a couple of days and then drive down to Napa for the rest of the week. However are there other ideas? Something others would recommend during that time of the year? I would love to see the sequoias but everything I read indicates the chances of getting in that time of year are slim due to snow. Just looking for some ideas. I really only want to more accommodations at a maximum of 2 times. Already found what looks like a great B&B in the Napa area. We are meeting with the couple tomorrow to try to finalize some plans so this is a “last minute” request. :slight_smile: Yes – I seem to be the planner in all of this.

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@FallGirl , how long are you going to be in NYC?

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So sorry to hear your news, kmc. That has to be tough, especially for your S.

Shaw – yes, move to Cambridge so we can be neighbors! Maybe we’d be invited to one of your fabulous sounding dinner parties!!!

My Cambridge Book Club is reading Being Mortal for our September meeting. We’re all of the age where it should be an interesting discussion.

Our beach house was designed with our “later life” in mind – the MBR is on the 2nd floor, but we could easily move into the guest “suite” on the first floor if stairs become a problem. That said, we’re definitely not within walking distance of anything except the beach – although home delivery of groceries is always an option.

Off to finish cleaning before our guest arrives for lunch.

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Hi all,

No idea what prompted me to stop by – it’s been ages. Sorry to hear about your ex, kmcmom. I’m with you…I’d wait to tell pretty much anyone other than, perhaps, dh and bff, if I had bad news medically but no other info.

RochesterMom, would you consider staying in SF for a couple of days before or after Napa? Other options include Muir Woods, Bodega Bay, Tahoe (might be too far?), Carmel, Monterey.

DH and I didn’t buy our house for this reason 24 years ago when we had a one year old–didn’t even cross our minds but it’s a perfect house to grow old in. Everything we need is on the main level. Downstairs we have the kids’ bedrooms, playroom and bathroom. We remodeled awhile ago so everything’s modern and the flow works. All our kids went/go to college across the country so, while my 2009 high school grad is local, it’s likely that at least one will not be. And, D1 plans to go to grad school, probably out of the area, so I like the idea of keeping the 5 bedroom house for the future in my mind when there will be grandkids that visit. Can’t walk to anything, though. but most everything can be delivered these days and I could see having a driver at some point, if need be.

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Very sorry to hear about your ex, kmc.

Our house has, in some ways, always been a bit small. But all the rooms we need are on the ground floor (2 BR and one bath up). So we are in the midst of a flurry of redoing. After 20+ years here, we finally redid the hardwood floors. We are in the midst of painting the entire interior (room by room, area by area). We built a new deck and have landscaped the backyard in California native plants. We are waiting to do the front yard.

This is all with an eye towards retiring here . . . but who knows what might happen?

D1 and SIL are currently celebrating their 5th anniversary with a trip to Japan (they both have Japanese minors from college). The fun thing is that our terribly introverted SIL is posting all kind of photos with descriptive commentary on Google +. Great insight into their travels and what he enjoys!

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Hmmm, Shaw – your list of wants matches mine pretty darned well except for the studio space. Our current house is very walkable to downtown, the library, and a natural foods market. It would take some remodeling to really make it nicely livable on the main level along - probably require that we lose the (never used much anyway) family room and turn it into a master bedroom suite. However, we think we’d like to eventually spend Jan/April in more pleasant climes.

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Z so glad your D did so well.
Happy anniversaries to all. we just had 31 yesterday.
kmc sorry about your ex. I wouldn’t have said anything either and I have experience with this.
My mother is very mad at my SIL because of the way she handled telling my brother she wanted out. I have grown up enough that although people do lousy things , they still make out all right. She is troubled by this. makes me think, NM how did you handle the anger you must have felt over your SIL and D1.
Being mortal just makes me depressed as I am already feeling many of these effects, however its a good read.
My H would never go to Cambridge too liberal for him. My D used to take ballet there and he hated it. I think its kinda cool.
We are in the process of updating things. and doing landscaping. My h wants to re do the kitchen but I don’t plan on staying here and I think someone would move in and change it to their liking
good luck on the house search. I think walking to places would be great.

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Also reading Being Mortal. Enjoyed the first 100 pages but am not finding the rest (so far) that novel. Many things that we have all thought about already as we watched our parents generation grow old. I do think that our group is already making plans and figuring things out rather than wait for a crises.

Still, so glad he wrote it and that many are reading it. I especially like his comment --help here as I do not have time to look it up–about intimacy long distance …or some such thing. This is how I feel about my kids and their lives. How really nice it would be to have them pop in for dinner but it may or may not happen for us and it will be OK either way.

NM, I have wondered also. You handled things with grace and I admired that.

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RM, ymmv, but I personally would enjoy puttering around SF for a few days, then stopping by Sausilito and Muir Woods en route to the wineries. I guess it really depend on the pace you’re after.

Last year we did the Carmel-Monterrey-SF-Napa circuit. That was a tad ambitious for my taste, though the drive along 1a was gorgeous. But generally, I’d have skipped either the southern leg or the northern leg had I my druthers.

Thanks for the well-wishes re my ex and mcson. Hopefully we hear some news today about options.

Makes me very grateful that however fleeting it may be, we’re all in good health here at the moment, even though mch has a decade on the ex.

Speaking of good fortune and Being Mortal, visited mch’s dad on Sunday. He’s now 86 and a half and still able to live in his home. Mind you, wife #2 is just turning 65 next week :wink: Clever bugger to have worked out that age-in-place-via-young-wife strategy :wink:

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Thanks everyone. I do like to see everything and be on the go-go-go on vacation. :slight_smile: I always joke that when we get back I need another week to just “be in place”. I’m NOT one for big cities though. That is part of the issue maybe. I like the ocean, mountains but like being there without a mob of people. H HATES traffic also so if he is driving he would prefer out in the country. :slight_smile: I expect that we will go into SF a bit. I just can’t see myself doing wineries for more than a day or 2. I mean yup I taste it - nope it doesn’t taste that much different from the last one. Yup there is a vineyard. You get it. :slight_smile: I’m sure for some it’s fine. Just not my idea of fun. I’m looking for places that we can go biking, hiking. I would love to go horseback riding as I haven’t really ridden since college (first pony at 3 years old) but I doubt that anyone else on the trip would be interested. Looking at the wine train - that might be fun one night for dinner. Also looking at the wine trolley so that we aren’t driving around the wineries and everyone can enjoy themselves. Of course we would still need to be able to get back to the B&B. :slight_smile: I still haven’t given up hope of starting up near the Redwood Forest - spending a day or 2 there and then driving down the coast to Napa. Meeting with the other couple tonight so we will see what everyone else is thinking. H will leave the decisions on this to me for us. :wink: