Good morning. Congrats and condolences, Fall girl. One of my clients is a home hospice and euthanasia vet. Its not at all uncommon to seek grief support after losing a fur baby.
RM, have you tried cold laser therapy for your girl? Also, Norsk foam pads turned color side down on slippery areas of floor and a good orthopedic bed are supposed to help quite a bit for canine arthritis, as I’m given to understand. Adequan or Pentosan shots are also supposed to restore some mobility and give relief.
Shaw, while complicated, enjoy the house hunting! I really think I should have planned to retire into real estate instead of being the younger partner in a design co, which I’m destined to maintain…because I love nothing more than looking at houses.
However, six years ago when we found this foreclosure and decided it would be the “death house” I promised mch I would stop looking and remain faithful 
The running joke around here was that I sublimated other types of prospective dalliances into my constant curiosity about homes on the market
Just like my man, though, this house isn’t likely to bore me for decades, because its complicated, cranky at times, and always benefits from a wee bit of improvement I guess some folks just like a puzzle. Lol.
Thanks for the suggestions KMC. She is on Rimadyl and that seems to help her for the most part. I will look into the cold laser therapy - not sure if we have it around here or not. Sadly the bed won’t work out. We purchased a new orthopedic bed for her several years ago and to this day the only time that she only steps on it is when she tries to get a bone or toy. She has an old (almost flat) bed now and I moved that downstairs and she won’t even use that downstairs. No she sleeps on a floor mat that is really an LLBean water hog mat that is in front of the door to the garage. She has several alternatives but no she chooses that. Really – stupid dog! She gets stuck in her ways and there is no convincing her different.
kmc…I need you as my Realtor! This is not my “death house” and I hope to find it in the next five or so years. We live in a triangular 10 minute drive between the Ds and us. Perfect location so hard to find any place that beats that. Our house is way too large so I want to downsize but still have room for entertaining and having over-nights with future grandchildren. I don’t want a condo or townhouse. I still want a private yard to entertain or garden. We are constantly looking so we are constantly updating in case we need to put the house on the market quickly. We did new roof, windows, deck and painted the exterior and interior this past year. New furnace is ordered and waiting for installation. Hard to find what we want!
I am awaiting a valuation on our current house. The good news for us is that the market has shifted to “in-town” locations and away from monstrous estates. So, houses in our neighborhood often sell before hitting the market and rarely stay on the market for long.
The hard part will be finding something that meets all of the constraints we’ve set.
RM, I observe a lot of people behaving like the dog. Was at a talk yesterday about emotions in situations of ideological conflict. You can teach people to regulate particular emotions that enable them to be more effective in finding cooperative solutions. But, most people in such situations DO NOT WANT to regulate their negative emotions. They get some kind of pleasure from feeling angry, victimized, hateful, etc.
I took 2 days off to visit D at school (waiting for her majors’ fashion show to start right now) and work is still stressing me out. Too many folks trying to be leaders when they have never even been followers on a deal like this.
Sorry to be away so long - been reading everything, just not posting.
NM, I really enjoyed A Gentleman in Moscow; glad your book club was a success. I am still participating virtually (via Facetime) in my old book club. Great discussion, but I miss the fun food and drink!
FG, I’m so sorry about your dog. I still miss ours and it’s been seven months. Glad your D’s GMAT went well.
shawbridge, good luck with the house shopping!
Best wishes to all of you planning September weddings!
Kind of in a state of flux here. H’s job goes through the end of May, and we need to be out of our housing by the middle of June. He doesn’t have another job lined up yet but has been in discussion/sending out resumes etc. Unfortunately things move REALLY slow for hiring.
My job is portable but we need to figure out where we’ll be. We’ve been offered free housing for July and August by a family who goes away to the beach - they like to have someone stay in their place while they’re gone.
D also needs to figure things out - her lease ends at the end of June. She’s been applying for jobs in various locations.
S is nearing the end of his first year of law school and is trying to find a summer internship.
So basically life feels very uncertain right now - trying not to be too anxious!
CQ, wow, I am sending you the “pleasant adventure amidst unknown” mojo
Missy, I don’t know what’s in the water lately, but I seem to notice/encounter a high ratio of worker stress/company dysfunction and I can quite put my finger on it.
At our book club dinner Friday night I was discussing this with a VP of a hospital/health co and said I’d wondered if the lack of economic growth in Q1 together with sluggish hiring was just squeezing the life out of what’s left in people, or if widespread cognitive dissonance was impacting people’s ability to function rationally. Or c) all of the above.
She found my musings quite interesting, as her cos. profits are down Q1 and their hiring has been sluggish…
I honestly think that having a politically fractured society and irrational leadership has far more reaching psychological effects than most realize. Just a hunch.
NM…on a completely different note…I was thinking about your wish list for an age-in-place but private home community.
In our neck of the woods, a lot of developers have historically carved out (mostly) gated communities in the former pastoral areas ringing our city…but the preferred construction has been the multilevel McMansion home. My home is indie, but within a mile of me there are multiple “mini” communities nestled in the woods that I can currently thank for boosting my property value
I’m wondering when developers will pick up on the trend for one floor ramblers that are elegant but low maintenance with a condo lot approach. I haven’t really seen it done yet here the way I would do it, which tells me that in about 20 years or so, many of these subdivisions may become under valued due to lack of demand as the population base swings.
The way I would plan such a community, since you have the cost of bringing service to the land anyway, would be to create ranches on generous lots, but condo the lots for maintenance, include a community gathering center with an adjacent urgent care center, and “staff” the community with transportation & grocery services. Somewhere between the notion of an HOA and an outright active living center for the portion of the population that’s too young to agree to or want a seniors residence. But not restricted to retirees…there would be good synergy to having younger families as well, with an arsenal of elders to babysit or supervise after school if so inclined.
I know this trend has started in other areas. I will watch it with interest.
lmc, I just read about such a community but cannot remember where is was located. If I could build my
own dream community for this stage of my life it would be a smaller version. Right now I would like a 10-15
homes that share an exercise center and a indoor/outdoor pool. All run as condo maintenance.
Nice walking and so on.
cq, sending caring thoughts your way. Very stressful. So glad that your job is safe and provides
stability.
We are in the midst of a preparing for a garage repair long overdo. Drywall and paint. Which
means that H has to get on board regarding purging. I will say he is impressing me. He and his
brother brought bikes and a patio table up from under the house for the Vietnam Vets to pick up.
Those things have nothing to do with the garage but once he said ok I went for it.
He is fighting his pack rat tendencies admirably today.
FG, I am sorry to hear about your dog. Still miss our little one even after 25 years.
RM, the only solution is to put an elevator in for your dog =D>.
Just a quick post here. My dad passed away early Sunday AM. He had heart problems as well as Stage 4 prostate CA for a few years but until the last few months had been doing quite well. He had been in the hospital for a few weeks, but had just transitioned to rehab. H, S and I made a quick trip to spend time with my mom. At dad’s request there were no services. H and I, along with D and SIL will be returning in 2 weeks for H’s niece’s wedding. At this point I am still in the denial stage.
Oh, FallGirl! 
So sorry for your loss. Sending {{{HUGS}}} your way. I hope you take care of yourself and find some peace and comfort in your happy memories of your dad. Sending prayers your ways.
Thank you for letting us know.
Hugs and hope that you and your family are doing ok with such sadness.
Peace and love to you and your family, FallGirl.
FG - so sorry for your family’s loss. I know how difficult it is to loose a parent.
Sending hugs to Fall girl…so sorry for your loss. Be kind to yourself xo
Cyber hugs to you, @FallGirl. So difficult.
Hope things get sorted out for you, @college_query. I’m not good with being unsettled.
My father turned 89 yesterday – we’re going up to my hometown in MA on Saturday for a family celebration. B, who came home from the hospital on 4/24, is up for joining us, according to SIL. He’s eating better and getting around fairly well. Yet, when I called my father yesterday, he said he doesn’t think B is doing all that well because he’s very gassy, doesn’t feel all that well, still has a drain, etc. Who to believe? Sigh …
Oh the joys of city living … I mentioned to D that they really need to get their registry up on their website. She said they will, as soon as they figure out the logistics of package deliveries. If stuff is left at the outside door of their condo building (only 3 units), it will most likely be stolen. (This happened at Christmas.) It’s not all that practical to have stuff delivered to us at the beach, either. Oh well, they’re smart – they’ll figure it out!
Sunday is my mother’s 93rd birthday. She is recovering from a broken hip. Not happy but getting better. We would normally head down there but ShawWife is completely tied up finishing things for her show in June at a very blue chip NY gallery. So, we’ll spend some time with my mother when we are in NY in June/July.
The gallery is writing a book about her and has begun introducing her to some museums (her work is in all of the major Boston area museum collections, I think, but not beyond Massachusetts)… The first one bought one of her pieces. So, this could be a pretty propitious event for her.
Fall Girl , I am so sorry to hear about your father. It is so hard especially when unexpected.
CQ seems like you just moved there!
D2 graduated yesterday her pinning was Thursday. She graduated Summa . She received some awards from the faculty but one of the biggest complements was her class voted her the person they would most want to be their or a family members’ nurse. Makes this nurse so proud.
I had my last final Wednesday, and need to finish a couple of clinicals. then done. (until the boards)
D1 is going to Europe for a month and then has an internship.
H and I are going to try to relax!
Once again, my heartfelt sympathies Fallgirl. .