<p>I think the first semester is a wake-up call and that is one of it’s invaluable learning values. Kids who have not been allowed to manage their own sleep/work/eat (and drink)/time management patterns in high school do have a steep uphill climb and some stumble and roll down the hill. But better to figure it out now then in the first job…and there is time to recover and regroup in most first-year college programs. Kids also discover how much they don’t know when they meet peers who are way better prepared in some areas than they are; they also discover that they might be better students than they thought they were when they are really out on their own and studying things that are more interesting and presented without worksheets, mindless homework and ridiculous point systems.</p>
<p>I started preparing my kids in HS. Once they hit 9th grade they had to do their own laundry, change their sheets, keep their room clean or not. I just didn’t interfere. If they wanted to sleep on dirty sheets for months on end then okay. They had to get themselves up and on the bus or arrange alternate transportation if needed (could be with me but I needed to know a head of time). Once they were juniors I allowed them to set their sleep schedules and once they were seniors they could stay out as long as they liked but they better have everything done that needed to be (ie. homework/ studying/ projects). I wanted them to be able to manage their time. If they needed help they only needed to ask but they needed to make it clear that they needed help. For my kids this worked but I’m sure that it wouldn’t for others. We always told them that they had been given enough rope to hang themselves with so be careful ;)</p>
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<p>Son has a friend who was in the bottom quarter of his HS class (the friend is a year older.) He had a hard time even getting into a state school. But he’s done fine so far. His parents are divorced and he lived with an inattentive dad. All through HS, the kid got himself up, fed himself, took care of his laundry, did the whole college testing and app process on his own. He may not have the highest IQ on campus, but he was VERY ready for the “being on his own” part of college. In fact, college is probably easier for him than HS because he doesn’t have to cook for himself.</p>
<p>mmaah, good point on lack of busywork. For my son, the lack of busywork was a real blessing. Some courses had weekly quizzes, but very little that wasn’t directly pushing forward learning while in HS, there were stupid assignments and rubrics and expectations. In Honors Chemistry, my son had weekly homework/notes grades and a participation grade. The teacher (who was excellent as an explainer) gave one grade if you had some things written down in the notebook and another grade for whether you could fog a spoon each day. There was also a grade for lab write-ups that was very persnickety. He had an A+ average on tests but in some quarters got an A- because of lab writeups. At college, the focus on what you know and not how neatly you can write it up is a boon for him.</p>
<p>My HS daughter is at a very challenging private school that is partially a boarding school. They tell us that graduates say that college was easier than HS (hard to believe). I don’t see any fogging the spoon grades. There is much more independence expected of students that at our son’s HS (until senior year, perhaps) and we do much less to help her manage it than we did with our son. I expect that she’ll manage the transition well (we’ll see) but we sent her to the school rather than our very good public HS just so that she would learn how to work at a high level.</p>
<p>A few days ago someone posted a web link that compared many online sites that sold discount textbooks. Does anyone remember it??? have been searching but can’t seem to find it. Thanks for any help you can give!</p>
<p>I think this was the post (sorry to the OP - I didn’t save the link, just the text).</p>
<p>"Dealoz.com will search all online book websites using the ISBN for you. I have used this website for years and saved many many $s on textbooks. "</p>
<p>Anyone heard from Owlice lately? (I’m ready for an afternoon snack!)</p>
<p>Thanks AllThisIsNewToMe!!! That was it!</p>
<p>Missypie…eating my almonds as we speak but wow, I really could use an Owlice snack!</p>
<p>D2 just made cookies…underbaked so they are super soft so she can eat them without injuring her mouth. They are very tempting! We have been feeding her mac n cheese, mashed potatoes, soft buttered noodles, applesauce and yogurt. She eats very little meat but says she is craving a Whopper!</p>
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<p>Love the fogging of the spoon remark. But this is very much what son has said to SOME degree. Mostly what he says is that some people seemed swamped with work and would say I have 3 hours of reading/homework to do whereas my kid says, I ONLY have three hours. He was very used to the work load of college level work before he ever got there. (Of course, cleaning up his room, laundry, etc were all very much a learning curve). He was always naturally good at managing his time and yet still found himself very busy come finals. So I would imagine for those NOT good at time management, first semester is a struggle regardless of the material being learned. But I will say that one bad grade (the very first test in his one class) was very hard to overcome when a class only has two tests, a midterm and a final paper to work with. Homework points of high school typically only work in a kids favor at our school and for a kid like Shawbridge’s who is bad at daily work but good at learning, he wouldn’t be penalized for not really doing all the problems in the problem set (which in college, if you don’t do the homework that’s your business for the most part). I think what daily quizzes are designed to do are facilitate time management (doing the work every day vs putting it off) and I think without the daily stuff, some kids put it off in college and then get caught unawares with way too much to catch up with not enough time to do it in. However, son said his formal labs were gone over with a fine toothed comb and his A- in the class was a direct result of the professor being very nitpicky when it came to grading the labs write ups.</p>
<p>Older D made Dean’s List and was thrilled (as are we), and I have been very good in that I haven’t so much as texted son since I confirmed his response to last week’s email from me. I will call this evidence of my own maturity.</p>
<p>NM, is your D doing okay pain-wise?</p>
<p>“I will call this evidence of my own maturity.”
Yes, I think this is what I really need to work on…</p>
<p>I’ve been enjoying having D around for the last 3 weeks and only one more week until she heads back to school. </p>
<p>It was a very pleasant surprise to come home and see that she had done the cleaning up that I had requested as well as some additional things around the house. Not something that would have happened this summer! </p>
<p>She’s making plans with a friend for spring break so won’t be back until summer. It seems like such a long time! </p>
<p>I hope you all are settling back into routines without your children. Much as I love having her here it does disrupt our day-to-day schedule.</p>
<p>Classes started Monday and S2 is overwhelmed already. He has trouble understanding two of his professors (Physics and Calculus II). A third speaks English, but he is overwhelmed with the amount of information already thrown at him (that is the computer science class). He thinks his engineering class will be a lot harder than last semester as well. At least he ended by saying he expects to do whatever it takes.</p>
<p>Looking at his curriculum, it just gets harder every single semester. I will be amazed if he keeps with it, given his track record in high school, but no sign of wanting to give up yet. I just finished reading Gladwell’s book Outliers. I wished I had given it to S2 to read over the break. It is very encouraging in its basic message that one of the secrets to success is just plain hard work. Fabulous book. I already told S1 it is a must read for him. (He reads a lot so I know he will actually read it.)</p>
<p>Physics and Calc II are gut classes no matter how you look at them, Analyst- D had the same issue last term with understanding but it did improve over the semester. She actually thinks this term will be easier - CalcIII and the second half of Physics. </p>
<p>S returned to school Sunday. He was very, very clear that he did not want me to come along. So H handled the return trip and the meeting with advisors and peer mentor. Their immediate suggestion was that S repeat classes he had withdrawn from or failed. Frankly, we did not see the merits of this. He did not have the foundation for these courses and needs to obtain that foundation at a CC over the summer if he decides to return. At this point it seems unlikely, mainly because H and I are unwilling to subsidize what basically amounts to a very expensive country club membership. </p>
<p>We will see how this semester goes. At least at this point he is required to attend study hall; we will be informed if he doesn’t go; he’ll meet with a mentor and we’ll get regular progress reports and have the opportunity to express our concerns as the semester progresses. </p>
<p>He knows that this is the end of the subsidy without result. It is now his responsibility to step up to the plate and accept responsibility for his own success or failure. We have communicated that failure to pull himself out of this hole results in being 100% on his own and he understands that. We may not have made perfect decisions along the way, but I am confident we’ve offered him a variety of assistance from a psychological, financial and educational standpoint.</p>
<p>The analyst that sounds like a tough course of study. My D friends who took calc 2/3 of the class failed. She took some other class and did well.
Shawbrdge thats for the sleeping thing I just always worry because she seems to get sick so easily.
She did get a number of GS for Christmas to Whole foods. along with whoopies i send her fruit.
I miss her but she has reconnected with her friends and is happy. loked the city</p>
<p>sorry about the spelling my vision accuity is different in the am. eye doc on weds.</p>
<p>I have had math courses in which I didn’t know if the instructor was speaking English or not during the first class but in each case figured it out. Also, you just have to read the textbook a lot more on your own.</p>
<p>TheAnalyst, the one question I have is whether it is a) possible and b) sensible to smooth out the load a little bit by deferring one of the harder courses until the next year/semester and replacing it with an easier one. I would advise my son to do that as a general rule.</p>
<p>DTE, lack of effective sleep does weaken immunity and my son got sick and didn’t recover lots through HS. He had surgery to improve sleep apnea and this fall got sick but recovered quickly. I don’t know if there are studies that suggest that going to sleep at 3 and getting up at noon is worse for your immunity than going to sleep at midnight and getting up at 9. If your daughter snores or has interrupted sleep (seems to stop breathing while she sleeping and then recovers), she might have sleep apnea which would mean that her sleep would not be effective. It is pretty unusual among kids (let me speculate that it would be more likely if they have weak muscle tone and weight gain).</p>
<p>sabaray- DS is also taking Calc III and 2nd half of Physics this semester. He too believes that this semester will be easier. For him, i think this is a form of magical thinking. He knows more what to expect, so it will be easier for him to handle. </p>
<p>He started class yesterday and DH got a panicked text “Need more $$$. Books.”</p>
<p>Here we go again. I have a feeling this semester will be over in a blink.</p>
<p>We’re fortunate in the books department. I think only one Physics book and a packet for some science and technology course. She has 18 credits again but I think she is better prepared- knows what to expect. She’s continuing with Chemistry this semester instead of CS- will take that in the fall and also plans on Differential Equations this summer. I think that will help with workload. </p>
<p>I wake up everyday and am thankful not to be a college student. Or at least not in engineering.</p>
<p>Not to get off topic, not that we ever stick to a topic (which is why this is my favorite thread ; ) but:
CYBERTRIP TO BARCELONA, FOLKS, LET’S GO!!!
We can charter our own plane and get a nice villa. Missypie can be our tour guide.
We’ll come back at the end of semester…hi ho.</p>