<p>Out of touch for a few days, and now there’s NO way I’ll remember all the topics I thought of responses to as I caught up.</p>
<h1>TM, you’ve done your job well - as parents, I think we have a responsibility to get them through high school and provide them, as best we can, with opportunities for college. You’ve done that, now it’s #TS’s turn, and he’s shown he’ll make it happen when it counts.</h1>
<p>I’m thrilled with S’s college choice, and hope and pray that he’ll be thrilled with it once he’s there. </p>
<p>He’s at his senior 4 day camping trip, and I’m sure having a blast. Prom is Saturday (and, of course, he has no idea what’s happening with the corsage and I’m trying to go with the flow on it) and since I’ll be driving him somewhere (another mystery, as is “who is your date?”), I’m counting on being there for pictures. Graduation is the 18th…such a whirlwind.</p>
<p>Fallgirl, I’m so surprised about your D and the award ceremony. I got an email from the school (a large public) that S will be presented with an award. He is NOT a top student, there are far too many kids to be able to list merit awards, so I assumed it was for his NM Commended Student rank. I talked to the GC and nope, not that - turns out they read out all the kids who have at least a 3.0 cumulative weighted gpa. It’s a nice thing, sure, but c’mon…at any rate, I’m hoping he’ll still be willing to attend as a lot of his friends will be receiving other awards.</p>
<p>Who has the last graduation date here? We need to raise our collective glasses that day - WE ARE DONE (well, there’s those checks to write…).</p>
<p>Anyone can attend ours. It’s more of the school being considerate and not making kids attend who are not receivng awards. There aren’t a lot of parents curious enough to sit through a long awards ceremony if their child isn’t receiving anything…but you can if you want. The “invitation” is the way of saying “your kid is getting an award so you should come to this.”</p>
<p>Oh, just found out a tidbit of info about our awards ceremony (which is tonight). There was actually a rehearsal for it yesterday at school. When the kids got in the room, they were told that if they got a green invitation, sit on the left and if they got a red invitation, sit on the right. The green invitations are the “super special” awards (in Son’s words). He will be sitting with the masses who received the red invitation…(wonder if they’ll divide up the parents accordingly…maybe the parents with the green invitations will get Sprinkles cupcakes at the reception and those of us with red inviations will get cupcakes from the Alberston’s bakery.)</p>
<p>Anyone can attend ours too. (The underclass honors night is by invitation, though.) All the seniors are invited to walk across the stage while a baby pic and then grad pic flash on the screen, along with the name of their college or other post HS plans. Someone reads a list of student’s accomplishments (including awards) that the student submitted. That’s nice because non-traditional and non-school related items are included (like the nationally ranked Irish dancer or my D, VP of her 4-state regional youth group). Only problem was the program was 3 hours long!</p>
<p>Missypie - That’s not nice! Talk about making kids feel like second class citizens. Geez…</p>
<p>my d got NMC last year, no big deal made about it . The head of our school made the benediction at bacclaureate about endings, the kids were sobbing… many parents requested a copy. It is on their website. It was eloquent. most about how transient life is. My D is busily looking and planning next years courses, backups, teacher reviews etc… I guess I shouldn’t worry so much. also making lists of what she will need. Much growth this year from last when she went kicking and screaming ito the college process. Marguaritas looking better and better!</p>
<p>Yeah, but I think by now, the red invitation kids are used to being red invitation kids…We honoring you a tiny bit but not as much as these other kids…</p>
<p>Of course, if the school as a whole knew what a differently wired brain Son has, everyone would stand up and applaud his accomplishments. </p>
<p>In law school there was a woman who walked with crutches. I never knew why she needed them…but she walked with crutches. When she walked across the stage at graduation, she got a huge round of applause…I guess for going to law school while walking with crutches. Who knows if there were any dyslexic or mentally ill kids for whom law school was a much greater challenge? Her issues were visible…but we had no idea if there were people who had overcome invisible challenges. That’s how I feel about my son…if people only knew what challenges he has overcome!</p>
<p>Of course, I think that parents care a lot more about how or whether their kids are honored at a school ceremony than their kids do. The students know what they have done; they know who is the smartest and the hardest working and the most talented. </p>
<p>Our county has a competition for high school musicals. The winners in the Best Actress and Best Actor get a 5 day expense paid trip to New York to get exposure at a national level. One of the guys from our HS won Best Actor this year. If he was given a choice between getting that Best Actor award and sitting the the “green invitation” section at the school awards ceremony, we all know which he would choose!</p>
<p>No mistake on the part of the school, she was not invited. Turns out what was referred to both on the website and in the Senior information packet as “Senior Awards Night” is actually Senior local (see below) scholarship night. Only. If a student wins a Regional/State/National scholarship he/she is not honored. D won a very nice scholarship from a local credit union however because it was not listed in the booklet given out by the school, she cannot be recognized for it. Sorry, I fail to see any logic being applied here.</p>
<p>The head counselor actually turned the tables on me and insinuated that it is my fault that D is not honored because she applied to only one of the scholarships listed in the book. I told her that we went through the book and it was the only one she qualified for ( she doesn’t plan to be a teacher, engineer, medical professional, we apparently practice the wrong religion, her sport,dance is not recognized by the school’s athletic dept., etc). There were some with a need component, I was told by another person in the guidance dept (not her g.c.) that D should not waste her time applying for those because they went to students at the very low end of the economic scale. ( BTW- I refused to name the person who told me this). Head g.c told me that isn’t true. Nice to tell me now.</p>
<p>I asked about any scholastic awards in school and was told that those were given in a daytime assembly. Given that D has been shut out thus far in her h.s. career, I’m not expecting anything. Head g.c. claims that every year D is nominated for “many” awards. I asked why if she is nominated so often, does she never win. ( D is not named Susan Lucci). No explanation.</p>
<p>I did mention the the top ten, was told " oh, they just get to stand up at graduation" in an offhand manner. I think 4 years of hard work and in D’s case also taking twice the # of AP courses as most seniors in our school ( a fact which I have verified) is worth more than an afterthought. But that’s just me.</p>
<p>I suggested in view of all of the above, that next year a line be put in the Senior information packet explaining that the ceremony is for local scholarships (in the book!) winners only. I asked that they consider D’s point of view as a top student when she saw so many classmates receiving invitations. Of course this would be informative and make sense so I hold little hope that they will act upon it.</p>
<p>OK that’s it. Good news is D is out of there soon. Bad news is I have another child to send through that place…</p>
<p>Thanks again for all of your show of support.</p>
<p>FallGirl, that is very disheartening. Your suggestion that they rename it for what it actually is makes sense…I do hope your D isn’t too disappointed. Fortunately for her, there is a LOT about her and what she’s accomplished to celebrate, with more success ahead of her.</p>
<p>Congrats Downtoearth and Historymom’s kids! Fallgirl, I don’t suffer fool very well–I’m sure you were politer than I would have been…</p>
<p>On another, incredibly frustrating note: I mentioned tha at the last jazz concert last night, S2 played a rollicking drum duet with his teacher of 11 years (think dueling banjos, but with drums) within a song that was SO cool. I cried–the expressions on their faces were so joyful, and the place was hopping! I was so excited, because we were videotaping–actually asked an 8th grader who was there who happily agreed, so DH and I could watch.</p>
<p>Just downloaded the video. The first 3 songs were taped; the last two, including the song with the duet are nowhere to be found. He must have turned the camera off. I am heartsick about it. I just wanted to see the two of them more closely. I’ll always have the memory of it, but wanted to give a copy of the tape to the teacher, band director, son and have one for myself…, so sad :(</p>
<p>My kid (class of 2012) recently got accepted into what we thought was a prestigious summer music program. We were ecstatic… until we got the bill. In this arena we’re used to footing a high bill, but how do you know which ones are worth the steep $$. Is there a “star” rating system somewhere? For us, a program needs to be competitive, provide quality instruction, and sparkle like a diamond on the pre-college resume. Weigh in.</p>
<p>sjth–your son’s dueling drum duet sounds amazing. and his teacher of 11 yrs–that is very cool. but oh how frustrating about the video and you’d think an 8th grader would be a high tech wiz. I rely on my 7th grader for any technical help all the time. do you think anyone else may have taped it?</p>
<p>fallgirl–congrats on your daughter’s accomplishments. now as for the school, grrr…their awards ceremony and process is just plain demoralizing to your daughter and other top students. sad to realize how often noone at the high school really thinks these things thru to consider how kids feel. its good she has a mom like you who can validate her experience ~ and give the school her opinion on the process… doesn’t make up for it though.</p>
<p>my d attended her schools award ceremony and they got one award wrong, left one out and called her by wrong first name. when she decided to leave before going up for the wrong award I supported her…she literally “stood up” for herself, (and walked out) which considering how shy and reserved she typically is was an accomplishment all on its own. ;)</p>
<p>fallgirl - I’m so sorry for that your D’s hard work and dedication will not be publicly recognized. Have you thought about contacting the principal to share your concerns and recommendations, so that future students and parents don’t have the same experience? Maybe you could share some of what you have learned on CC about how other schools handle senior awards differently and better.</p>
<p>I did that last summer regarding the high school profile that accompanies transcripts to colleges. Ours was woefully inadequate - incorrect and missing information, grammatical errors (!), etc. Based on what I had learned on CC I made LOTS of recommendations and they rewrote the entire thing.</p>
<p>FallGirl
I AM sorry, just wipe your hands of it, on to bigger and better things. My experiences of HS (for myslf and for my son) back up my former suggestion. Sure does make it easier to go and never look back doesn’t it?
Poo on them, that is all I have to say (rather maturely I might add)</p>
<p>Another case of mom rage here. Son’s graduation is tomorrow night. The only thing happening for him at school tomorrow is rehearsal and senior picnic. Tonight around 6pm, I got both an automated phone call and an email saying that he has something outstanding that must be cleared up by 7:45 tomorrow morning in order for him to graduate!!! And we have absolutely no idea what it is. He turned in all his textbooks, turned in his band instruments and uniform, didn’t check out any library books this year, paid transcript fees and senior dues. </p>
<p>We have two awards ceremonies which is sort of like the red and green business. One is during the day and includes things like the junior book awards, AMC math awards and some other things I’ve forgotten. The other is in the evening and it’s the one where they announce the top 25 kids in the class, all the departmental awards and all the money awards. Only one junior gets invited to that one - the RPI medal winner. Many kids end up at both ceremonies.</p>
<p>oh sob
last vocal concert tonight and tons of songs from “Wicked”, all tearjerkers.
S and H did a magnificent job on A nigtengale Sang in Berkley Square. It was FABULOUS - huge cheers. And SO many talented kids doing WONDERFUL songs. Geez I was a wreck. 11 seniors leaving the choir of not quite 30. It will make a dent.</p>
<p>This is really happening. This part of his life is over… so WEIRD!!</p>
<p>BUT there is so much to come. It is just that <em>I</em> won’t be there to celebrate it. No one really told me motherhood would mean “no more” of things I so enjoy. But there will be other things, right?</p>