Parents of the HS Class of 2011 - Original

Parents of HS Class of 20xx
2101

<p>EmmyBet,
Thank you for your post. It is sincerely appreciated. We honestly try to keep him grounded. I reread my post and I did sound pretty frustrated. We had just come from one of the lovely school award ceremonies where it is painfully obvious how much some kids are doing, and you just wonder 1) HOW?, and 2) How does a student like my son stand a chance? I came here to say it because I can’t say it in front of him. It is such a balancing act.</p>

<p>Last year I would only sign off on four weighted blocks. We fought about this. He had been preAP in all but IT classes for his 9th-10th grade yrs. He knew some kids were taking many more. Some are cut out for it. I know my son and we dropped the AP in language (but kept the language), and stayed out of the AP track in social sciences. He concentrated on Math, Science, and English. His other classes are IT (programming, engineering, CAD, etc.) which he loves. This year we had the argument over APCompSci… teacher is lousy and he would be miserable. Not worth the AP IMHO. He’s taking Computer Math, which in our school is code for C++. The teacher is awesome and he will be in his happy zone. He year will be much better spent. Although he knew he wasn’t doing as many APs as others, he really wasn’t overly concerned until the ‘magical mystery college tour’ over spring holiday.</p>

<p>His intended major is Aerospace/Mech Engineering. This is not something he’s wishy washy about and picked out of a hat. His EC is directly related to engineering, hands on. It is many hours, but he does love it. To take the stress off, H and I both mentor (not directly with his direct area so he has his space!)… but we are there as a family. This does make a huge difference. I see the students whose parents do not support the activity and the student is torn not only by the EC & school, but home as well. We live at the lab during certain parts of the year… bringing our younger son too who learned so much just by being there. He is NOT allowed to hold a job because of the already high demands. H and I disagree on this and I have gone head to head on him with this.
Once H started to mentor, he saw what S was learning and agreed it was much more valuable. His community svc is in this area as well. He mentors and elementary school team related to his EC. He loves this! It’s one thing to be able to do something, but quite another to be able to teach it. A totally different skill set. The kids love him and he looks forward to it!</p>

<p>He has a great group of friends (guys & girls) that we have insisted Saturday nights is ‘time off’ from other demands to see them. They have known each other for years, many since elem school so there is a strong bond. They are all high achieving students and have stayed out of trouble, so far (fingers x’ed). They are looking at different schools, a few overlap, but none are insisting ‘we must be roommates!’. He also plays electric guitar for stress release… I can gauge his mood by what he’s playing. No headphones allowed. Bad for the ears, and I love to hear him play. He gets at least 20min/day.</p>

<p>I don’t mean to be giving a laundry list of how we try to keep things balanced. Your post was just so nice and really had some great information. I wanted to let you know what we ARE doing. My first post really was a frustrating SOS from a mom that tells her son to keep his academics where his strengths are and stick with the EC he loves and is related to his intended major.</p>

<p>He is only looking at state schools ($$) but there are only two that have areo and they are very competitive (one more so than the other). We have had to do research on schools that offer aero oos that are recruiting heavily with good merit aid so it would be affordable. We have found two options. We will visit this summer. He is REALLY against them (doesn’t want to be that far from home). We will bring the best friend to make the road trip more fun. Seeing a school roll out the red carpet and offer him an honors program because of academics may become very flattering to him after visiting the two state schools where they really don’t care who you are until you apply and are admitted. Even if he’s not interested, it will certainly make him feel good. He has to find a safety. I know if more instate schools offered his major he would not feel as much pressure. I don’t know anyway around this. His GPA, rank, and achievements are certainly quite good. We are waiting on his SAT scores. As per good advise he will also sit for the ACT to see if he simply does better with that format.</p>

<p>He is not our oldest, but our first to go through the college application process at this level, so essentially this is new to us.</p>

<p>Thank you again for your post and kind words. Thank you also for indulging me in ‘verbal vomit’ as H calls it! :slight_smile: I am so glad to have found CC. Great information, but more importantly great support from truly kind people.
Peace</p>

<p>btw-no books at all this weekend! GF’s prom and unexpected invitation to go sailing with her family Sunday. I am told this is code for acceptance from GF’s father… after nearly a year :slight_smile: Only one other (sister’s college bf) has ever received this honor. He came home just beaming!! He had ‘driven’ for quite some time and been taught quite a bit… gf said her dad hogged him. :slight_smile: Great weekend for him!</p>

2102

<p>My S is a combination of what you’ve described. Doesn’t like to have expectations hoisted on him. Super bright kid, but a bit too chill. I have tried to back off considerably, not asking about tests and so on, but he REALLY needs to step it up. Is it too much to ask for him to take one practice test?
I think it’s mostly my own anxiety acting up. I read too much here, and the kids are all always practicing, practicing, practicing.</p>

2103

<p>^For the SAT? Does he have the Big Blue Book? Due to time constraints S2 didn’t study as much as many others here, or take a prep class. He did take the practice tests several times. It helped to get an idea of managing his time during the test, and identify a pattern of any questions that they are missing consistently. I would recommend it, but it is hard if they are really resisting.</p>

2104

<p>^^ I second the reall college board SAT blue book…</p>

<p>though our student didn’t get much time in it in the week before the exam in Jan…</p>

<p>I have heard that its the best–much better than others…and
like your student–ours has no time for prep classes etc…</p>

<p>I am hoping that after a spring of tests–that the June SAT will go well having “broken the ice” on so many others…</p>

2105

<p>SAT2’s actually. He took the SAT and did pretty well. He has a blue book and Princeton Review books for the SAT2’s. I signed him up for the ACT also, but he hasn’t looked at that book yet (ever?) I know I have to let him “own” this process, so I try to make suggestions, but leave it there.</p>

2106

<p>I am a big advocate of doing 5-10 SAT problems a day, scoring them and then figuring out what you did wrong. At this point most kids know the tricks, have taken many timed tests, psat, etc so I don’t force my kid to sit down and do a timed practice test. I do encourage him to work on problem areas. That said, does he do it on his own? Sometimes, but mostly I need to prompt him, but he doesn’t usually mind 15-20 minutes it takes.</p>

2107

<p>My S will take the ACT for the first time in June. I expect I will look up the tips and tricks for that test and pass them onto S. I paid for the online test prep ACT offers, $19.95 and told S last night I want him to start doing some problems during his study periods in school. Again, I am sure I will have to remind him occasionally to do this.</p>

2108

<p>^^^c43 - Ahhh, S2 is taking SAT2s in June as well. Nooooo motivation whatsoever! It has been such a pressure cooker as for all our students. SAT’s in early May. Just finished APs. </p>

<p>I asked him last night to pick out a study book and gave him a link to the CC SAT Subject test threads. I said kindly when he left for school this AM to please leave a note with the book choice. Not too worried about Chem. He just took the AP and from what I understand he should be prepared if he stayed on top of the material during the year. He opted to stay with his AP study guide. Fine with me. For the Math2 he choose Princeton Review. Good enough. As long as he looks it over a few times I am not getting my knickers in a knot over it.</p>

<p>ACTs the week following simply to get a baseline but I don’t want any prep to take away from finals etc. I would like him to review the format before he walks into the test.</p>

2109

<p>blueiguana: Thank you for telling us your story. Your son sounds like a wonderful guy!</p>

<p>Yes, you were welcome to vent here, and that’s what we’re for. I’m so grateful to CC for having a “Parents’ Forum.” It’s wonderful to have a place where we have permission to talk about this, as much as we want to. It does save our kids from having to listen to us obsess! Much better to do it with each other.</p>

<p>It looks like the world will help your son decide what he’ll do - if where he gets in is OOS, then he’ll either get used to that or change his mind (or try it and transfer, or or end up with one of the thousand other pathways in life). It does sound like he’s very solid about what he’s interested in, and I think that does happen - my D1 went to school undecided, but I would have bet big money she’d end up a bio major, as she has. D2 wants theater, and I have no doubt that will be what she does, in some way. Some need to explore, but some do have strong passions that stick with them (us) for life.</p>

<p>He’s doing great - don’t be scared. But some of this will only be bearable a week at a time, an hour at a time! It’ll be a long year for all of us.</p>

<p>Tests: My D doesn’t look like she’s doing much prep for either SAT2s or the next ACT, and I don’t know when she will. Maybe she’ll surprise me. I think just the fact that she’s more experienced and could luck out (or not) with a different test could be enough for a higher score. So much of it is state of mind. But it is on her; mostly she’s busy with school and ECs, so it’s not so much being irresponsible. If she’s watching TV and really blowing it off, I’ll say something (but I thought she wasn’t prepping for other stuff; turned out it was the last thing she’d do in bed every night, when I was already asleep). </p>

<p>I do feel that this next year is huge practice for being at college with no one watching over her, so I’m pulling back as much as I can. She’s made huge strides this year in being organized and getting things done, mostly through other outside forces, and just growing up in general. I love it when it’s not ME that makes that happen!</p>

2110

<p>D2 is taking one SAT II in June. She’s not studying because it’s in the same subject as a well prepped AP, so she should be fine unless she has massive brain drain in less than a month!</p>

2111

<p>I seriously just need to let out a very loud cyber-scream!!! I am of the mindset that if no one hears you it doesn’t count. No one is home to enjoy my lung power…</p>

<p>Arrrrrgggghhhhh!!!</p>

<p>That’s all. Thanks guys!</p>

2112

<p>^^
No problema!</p>

2113

<p>blueiguana - I too am tired of AP tests, then finals then SAT subject test and then the ACT. I will be so glad when it is June 13th. Plus I have one graduating the last week of May. Thank goodness he didn’t want a party or I would be looking for a cliff to jump off. The only test prep thing that is holding my S’s interest is the online Sparknotes for Subject tests.</p>

2114

<p>I bought this ACT prep book for my son - [Amazon.com:</a> Kaplan ACT Strategies for Super Busy Students: 15 Simple Steps to Tackle the ACT while Keeping Your Life…](<a href=“http://www.amazon.com/Kaplan-Strategies-Super-Busy-Students/dp/1419553240/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1274147406&sr=8-3]Amazon.com:”>http://www.amazon.com/Kaplan-Strategies-Super-Busy-Students/dp/1419553240/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1274147406&sr=8-3) and he has not yet opened it up. I reminded him today that the test is less then a month away. I’ll probably keep reminding him until he gets the message…</p>

2115

<p>lol on the subtitle kathiep “procrastinator’s guide to the ACT”! I should pick that up for LuckyBoy, to join the dusty SAT blue book… :D</p>

<p>fogfog, sorry to read about your GC difficulties on the other thread. I understand a public school GC not being able to help with college work, but a private school? And a smallish school at that?? I don’t understand why Naviance cannot be used outside the school. We’ve had access to Naviance since S’s freshman year!</p>

2116

<p>G’morning all. Thanks for the rec on the ACT guide kathiep!</p>

<p>fogfog, I saw on the GC post your frustrations as well. At a private school you do tend to expect more from your GC during the college application process. I don’t know if this is fair or not, but it does seem to be one of the services people receive. As you also pointed out (and fairly), many of the things a GC deals with at some publics, are simply not an issue at your school, so the GCs time is not taken by advocating for students in court. I guess if students in private school go to court their parents are more likely to advocate for them! lol In all seriousness, one thing I don’t understand is the difficulty people have in accessing Naviance. Let me rephrase, the difficulty the schools put on accessing Naviance. We have been able to access via a link through our schools website and enter as a ‘visitor’ since S1’s first year.</p>

<p>Here’s hoping for a wonderful day for all. Feeling VERY lazy on this rainy day and I’m going to shuffle down the hallway to the library and dust off a book I haven’t read in a while for a good read! :slight_smile: I could give up my dining room any day (and wish my home office would go away in a puff of smoke), but I treasure my little library! :)</p>

<p>Peace</p>

2117

<p>I hope we don’t regret this later, but D is taking the SAT in June (she took one subject test in May) and other than the “Question of the Day” is not doing any additional prep. Between end of the year projects and studying for finals (which are the day before and the Monday and Tuesday after the SAT’s) she just doesn’t really have time. Yes, I could force the issue and have her commit to sitting down with a prep book for a set period of time, but she did really well on the PSAT with no prep, and will be submitting her ACT score to colleges - she’s taking the SAT b/c it’s required for National Merit consideration. She’s pretty confident that she’s ready to take it, but reading everyone else’s posts I’m afraid maybe I’ve dropped the ball.</p>

2118

<p>My good friend is a very experienced SAT coach, and she says taking these tests is all about the game. She only recommends doing a few practice questions to get the feel for them, to understand the little “tricks” (like noticing the NOT in “does NOT belong”), and to be in a good head space the day of the test. So her prep advice is to feel ready for the test experience - being ready to get the questions answered, with the knowledge that you have, period. She also says that kids who do well on them will do well - if your D has a great score on a couple, she’ll be fine. Too many factors go into whether they can do 20 or 40 pts better (what questions are there that day, etc., etc.) that you can’t make yourself crazy that way.</p>

<p>These kids are not going to absorb a whole new set of knowledge in a month. And while I also regret 2 Saturdays of testing coming right at the end of the school year, at least I know my D’s in “school mode” and the material is fresh. She feels the same way. She’ll just have to get sleep and be psyched to “be a robot” when she takes the tests (her problem is lack of confidence, mind wandering, losing track of time). That worked very well for her on ACT in April, and her score went up hugely - because she bought into the “game” of the test.</p>

<p>Just think how nice it will be to be done with this all in a few weeks! And on the other hand there are fall test dates if anyone really wants to give it another bash. Kind of a win-win situation, except it’s not much fun until it’s over.</p>

2119

<p>I think the benefit you can get from preparing must depend on the kid. My son felt that he should be able to better on the SAT than he did on the PSAT and he was motivated to try for it. So he did about 8 of the 10 practice tests in the big blue book, spread out over a period of two months. He did a section at a time, not a whole test. He did it in a thoughtful way; after each section he tried to understand the questions he got wrong and also the ones he got right by luck. He ended up raising his score by 250 points from the PSAT. </p>

<p>It was clear that by the end, he knew a lot more vocabulary; he knew a bit more about grammar and punctuation; and he knew how to approach all the tricky math problems, even the ones that had stymied him before. He said that preparing for the SAT made the AP English Language test easier too.</p>

2120

<p>Cooker-if the purpose of the SAT is just to move from semi-finalist to finalist status, I think your dd doesn’t need to study. She just has to get a score that shows her PSAT score wasn’t a complete fluke.</p>

<p>If she decides she wants to submit an SAT score to colleges along with her ACT score she could take it again in early October and study over the summer. </p>

<p>Of course if she becomes a Natl Merit Finalist and is applying to schools which give Natl Merit scholarships, she’s already in good shape. Most finalists end up applying to super-competitive schools which don’t give Natl Merit scholarships.</p>