<p>I’ve sent 3 care packages so far.
They’ve been filled with assorted sillyness from the $ store with a few toiletries thrown in for good measure. 1 of the pkgs was a roommate package with 3 quart size bags each labeled with the girl’s name and filled with identical items like facial mud masks, pez dispensers, temporary tatoos, highlighters, bookmarks, coloring books, etc. That one was a real hit.
I’m ready to send off my Halloween package next week. Also filled with dollar store items to decorate their suite. Banners, window stickers, welcome mat, napkins, plastic spider rings, scary masks, etc.</p>
<p>The funny thing, if you knew me, you’d be surprised I was doing this. I am so NOT a care package kind of person! But like those of you upthread have stated…I think I’m doing this more for me than for her. It’s a way to feel a little bit needed and stay a small part of her life.</p>
<p>I’m sure it will fade as time goes on but for now I’m sending packages!</p>
<p>So far my son seems to be doing great (I Hope?). As I previously posted my son has Aspergers which is in the Autism spectrum. We dropped him off on August 16th so it has been a full month plus a couple of days. When we ask him how he is doing? He always tell us he is doing great. He had some bad days on week 3 when he realized that Calc and Chem for Engineering was not so easy. But now he is caught up and as he told us “I am able to breath again”.</p>
<p>Aspergers affects an individuals ability so act correctly socially and to make friends. As I previously posted his room mate was not a good match. We had hoped that he would come around in time but he has not. My son feels sorry for him. Says he is afraid of his own shadow and never looks at him in the eye. So my son has had to look elsewhere for his socializing and entertainment.</p>
<p>He has gone to all the Gator games with three different groups. Every weekend he goes with some acquaintances to some frat party or clubbing and when we speak with him he seems to be adjusting well. </p>
<p>We worry but I have read that a parent should never ask if his child is depressed. I am sure that we would have picked up by the tone of his voice if he was right? But since he has his diagnosis we want him to be happy. I just wished he could make one good friend. But this is only week 4 so far so good.</p>
<p>We are going to visit him this weekend. Hopefully he hasnt lost to much weight?</p>
<p>Once again thanks for this site. You guys are the best.</p>
<p>Just got home from (finally) getting our DD to UChicago. After spending the last 16 years thinking about this, and the last year obsessing about this, I have to say that I truly believe she is in the best possible school for her with the best possible preparation (not to mention great color coordination between her and her roommates comforters, throw pillows, and other assorted accoutrements). Convocation had some wonderful speeches about the life of the mind and the joy of intellectual discourse (with extra bits tagged on that we all could have done without). After grinding through law school, I never though I would say this, but I really wish I was doing all this again. Looking with envy at the course catalogs brought back fond memories of courses that were totally irrelevant to my major, such as costume design, urban planning and my way above my head but life-changing course on comparative Buddhism, Confucianism and Taoism in 18th century China. We should all be proud that we have raised our children, given them an appreciation for not only the importance of, but the joys of, higher education, and sent them on their way. Being a parent is pretty great, isn’t it?</p>
<p>Well said – I’m with you on that! Congrats on a smooth move in! And I bet happy colors make the room feel like home already.</p>
<p>We had our first Skype session with D (we’d Skyped with her before when she was in Paris over the summer, but this was the first “college” Skype). SO GREAT to see her – it was like she came home for an hour, then went back to school. I could see her hand (fingers still curled; still swollen but it’s less now) and see her face (she didn’t look exhausted or skinny which is what I worried about). And two really great things – she said S '14 should try and get recruited for baseball and go to her school, and she LOVES the business school! </p>
<p>Congratulations, 325! I keep wondering what it would be like here if our D had chosen Chicago or Stanford and was just leaving now. I think I’m happier that she left a month ago; I have regained my equilibrium and have no desire to go through that first week again. On the other hand, I know she would also have loved Chicago and will always have a little bit of that ‘what if’ when she thinks about it. What a wonderful school.</p>
<p>325 - my warmest wishes! I can remember moving into Chicago like it was yesterday. I wish your D all the best. May all of your dreams come true!</p>
<p>We are so close to being all moved in! This is such a meaningful moment, such a meaningful year for everyone. And more to come!</p>
<p>D had a rough weekend. We all hit a wall and had a long talk with her. She’s really just mad and frustrated and overwhelmed, and while I worry about how it could become a more serious problem I am completely sure it is NOT the school or anything but dealing with the adjustment to college in general. Yesterday she had some more positive things to say, and we’re finding little ideas that can make her life more enjoyable. </p>
<p>For example, today I’m mailing her a pot so she can steam artichokes, her favorite food. Since she has a fairly limited food plan anyway (by choice) we’ll do our best to supplement with foods that really make her feel good. It’s bothering her that too much in the dining hall is junky. This will help a lot.</p>
<p>And we’re improving communication. It’s all steps in the process. </p>
<p>On the dog topic - when our old dog died 4 years ago, H and I thought how nice it would be to go “dogless” as we entered our empty nest. D2 asked could we please have a dog while she was in HS, said we weren’t being entirely fair to her. Now we’re very glad. Our dog is our best buddy, our perfect kid who never has a problem, never talks back, and always loves us unconditionally. We have neighbors who can let him out and a good kennel, so having him really doesn’t limit our life. For us, having him is so totally worth it! He is a 30-lb English Cocker Spaniel who is as cuddly as a 2-year-old, as fun as a 5-year-old, and will never become a “teenager”!</p>
<p>It’s been a while since I checked in; not much to report here, but can I say that I LOVE Skype! Really love it. We are planning on weekly Skype chats with flexibility on time depending on D’s schedule - we had initially planned on Sunday nights, but she couldn’t do it Sunday night because of a birthday party for a girl on her floor (yes!). </p>
<p>Like many of you, I was a little concerned about D’s finding her posse and now that she is almost at week three, it sounds like she is making connections. She’s in the freshman girl’s choir, and is probably going to run for a position in her hall council (SO not like her - but I am thrilled that she wants to be so involved). She definitely is an organizer so a role like that would suit her nicely. Between that and her course work she said she is very busy. She described what she’s doing in several of her classes and they do sound really interesting (and definitely over my head!). I am heading up there on Saturday morning for Parents Weekend. I will plan to be on the road by 5 AM so I can be there by noon, then heading home the next day. Books on tape will definitely be in order - this is the first time I am doing this drive by myself. It will be interesting to see the difference between spending the day on campus for move in and experiencing it with D after she’s been there for a few weeks. I’ll report back - fingers crossed that things are going as well as they sound like they are.</p>
<p>**The next new student move-in at Stanford University moves-in on September 20th - TODAY!
Move-in day is TODAY!<br>
Labor Day is past. Football season is in full bloom. The summer is gone as fall arrives this Friday. :eek:</p>
<p>[ul][li]Our last new student move-ins are the University of Oregon and the University of Southern Oregon on September 22nd which is just 2 days to go. </p>[/li]
<p>The LAST Move-in day is in 2 days. Now with just 2 days to go the season of move-ins is almost complete.[/ul]</p>
<p>If you son’s or daughter’s move-in dates and schools are not listed, just post them as its too late to add them to the list as this countdown is over in 2 days!**</p>
<p>Morning all - I love checking in with you all during my “tea break” at work. Congrats and best wishes to our later launches. Hugs to those worrying about their kids (all of us, I guess, but some more than others). D definitely had a week or two of adjustment regarding work load and communal living. I am happy to say that she is doing well now. She hit the lottery with a great roommate and “house” (entryway). She said she is figuring out how to process her work. D is singing in a group and club swimming and feels the right amount of busy/connected. Food is okay, but not great. I have sent two boxes (but I declined to do the pre-packaged ones that were marketed with guilt). It’s fun for me to think about her getting them. I am feeling so grateful for how it is all turning out.<br>
LOVE THIS: We should all be proud that we have raised our children, given them an appreciation for not only the importance of, but the joys of, higher education, and sent them on their way. Being a parent is pretty great, isn’t it?</p>
<p>We went to D1s school on Sunday to watch younger D2 play field hockey on the college field with her HS team. We then took D1 and some friends out to dinner to celebrate her birthday. She seems to be keeping up with her courses, and tries to be a few days ahead of when the assignments are due. She was always great at time management, and it seems to have carried into college.</p>
<p>She is enjoying herself, but does look a bit tired. She likes to be able to go to bed when she is tired, and is having a tough time since her roommates stay up later than she does.</p>
<p>H or I see her at a game once a week, since we live relatively close. She said that all of the freshman fh players want to be able to go home for a weekend, but they have Saturday games, so they must stay around on the weekends. The main reason she wants to go home is to take home summer clothes, and exchange for winter clothes. I am going to a game tonight, and will be bringing her some winter clothes, and she will give me some summer clothes in return. Her room is much too small to keep both seasons of clothes in her itty bitty closet and drawers.</p>
<p>Welcome back, Renmom! It’s very nice of you to help out the young lady. I think that the tippy top schools would be quite a reach for her, but that she has a good shot at many of the schools mentioned by Boysox3. In terms of diversity, UMDCP and Temple come to mind. Is cost and distance from home an issue?</p>
<p>325: I’m glad to hear that your D’s move-in went well. My nephew is a senior at Chicago, and he’s had a great experience socially and academically.</p>
<p>Classof2015: I’m so glad to hear how happy your D is, depsite her injury.</p>
<p>Emmybet: I hope things get better for your D soon. It sounds like the best thing you can do is keep listening.</p>
<p>My D is coming home this weekend for a follow-up medical test from her August illness. Things are going very well at school, but she’s looking forward to coming home. She said that she’s a little bit homesick and misses us, her friends and especially her dog. I can’t wait to see her.</p>
<p>I know that some “experts” advise not letting kids come home until Thanksgiving, but both of my daughters seem to feel the need to touch base and recharge periodically.</p>
I heard that too. My S is also coming home this weekend. He said he wanted to go to his HS football game and I think he is homesick as well. S2 has to skip his campout this weekend so he can see his brother. This is the first time S will be home since we dropped him off 5 weeks ago. Many of his HS classmates came home during the Labor day weekend.</p>
<p>It is very good that you are going to see him in person. When my Aspie son crashed and burned 2nd semester of his freshman year, I’m pretty sure that if we had actually seen him (and his room) rather than just talked to him, we would have known that things weren’t going well.</p>
<p>I know what the experts say. I was holding to the ‘stay at school as much as possible during the first semester’ routine. I later found out that Bluejr was pretty upset thinking he wasn’t welcomed home at all. I heard this from his dad. It was clearly a case of miscommunication but from then on I took it all with a grain of salt. We know our kids best. There is wisdom in staying on campus to make friends. Their is wisdom in going to see them to do a face2face check so they stay put (and for reasons missypie states above). Then you just stinking let your kid come home and sleep in their own bed. If it’s an easy drive and it’s not every weekend, use your best judgement. A key is for you and your student to know why they are coming home…are they tired, need a break or is there something more? Just keep an eye on it. </p>
<p>Bluejr came home at the three week mark because it made sense based on our planned visits to see him later in the month. He’ll be home for break in October. He may even ditch campus for parents weekend to get away from the crowds…we will be there for an event for his younger brother so he’d have a ride home. To us, this is no big deal if he wants a break. If it’s something bigger then you see if you need to help your student adjust. </p>
<p>Just as we parents are going different roads to adjusting to our kids being gone, they will go different roads. The vast, vast majority of us, kids and adults, will get there just fine. A very few will need some extra help. That’s okay too.</p>
<p>My son had let all of his prescriptions run out…which was a very bad thing. I am still haunted by the state his room was in when we came to move him out…not just “boy messy” but an indication of more serious problems. Sometimes you just need to see your kid in person.</p>
<p>Ds called to check in. He’s got the cold that’s going around too, seems inevitable when you combine lack of sleep with stress and a sudden cold snap don’t you think? He did find all the meds in the Rx kit I put together but swears the cold-eaze just made the cold come on faster. Oh well. Seems to be mostly happy, adjusting, making friends, getting to office hours to work his magic (pls, don’t even ask, the boy is utterly charming - big state school, huge classes? yeah, well he still “works” the office hour angle). Found out his calc prof just immigrated from China, from his father’s hometown. (Wink. wink) Now, chem prof is next… But, the whole sickness makes me want to ship a care pkg even more so off to the post office I go.</p>
<p>And, jelly orders and addresses pls, I am ready to ship!! (pm me)</p>
<p>Blue - you have a way with words, I like the “stinking” part too (but I forget how to quote - again)</p>
</p>