<p>Pepper - Good to hear everything’s going well for ds. Caring thoughts your way about your father, hope things are stable or manageable.</p>
<p>Another example about how I don’t like to have sooo much contact from ds, he just texted me “sweet, just heard gunshots on lower campus. currently running away to my dorm or maybe I’m hearing things but I definately heard a scream” Isn’t the unconditional love of your mother a wonderful thing?</p>
<p>Oh good grief AK I don’t know how you stay sane. Please let us know if he is OK?</p>
<p>Yes, now he thinks he just imagined it or something because there hasn’t been any of those “emergency” texts from his college. He did run all the way up to his dorm (which is about 10 min walk up a 45 degree hill) but noone up there heard anything about it so they think he’s crazy. I told him it was better to be crazy than to be correct. But who’s kid would think to text their mommy whilst running away? I’m the lucky one right?</p>
<p>Amanda: Oy! That’s a text you could have lived without. I hope everything’s okay.</p>
<p>Pepper: I’m glad to hear that your son is doing well and that you had a nice visit. His schedule does sound pretty ambitious. It’s possible that some profs will curve grades at the end of the semester.</p>
<p>My D is doing fine, but she’s frustrated at how hard it is to earn A’s in college. She got great feedback from a professor on her first paper, but the highest grade in the class was a B+. I’m glad that she’s motivated, but I hate seeing her so stressed out when she’s doing well.</p>
<p>Amanda, eek!</p>
<p>Pepper, what are the other freshman doing on weekend nights? When I was a freshman we just partied/hung out in our rooms on Sat. night or the hallways as I went to a school in a place were the drinking age was 21 even then (what was I thinking?)</p>
<p>oy, Amanda, glad you did hear back promptly that all is well, at least!</p>
<p>Our freshman doesn’t party til Sat nights because of practice EARLY Sat am…</p>
<p>So Fri nights is not a late night. My guess is there is lots of hanging out at res hall and attending some event on campus that doesn’ run too late. No one on the team parties Fri nights.
Sat am Practice. Brunch. Shower, hang out.
Sat pm dinner and then to a party at a team house, a party in a res hall etc. Sometimes to a improv show or some other event on campus like a volleyball game etc.before said party.
Sun. sleep in. Brunch. Do laundrey. Get a jump start on P sets, write compostions/essays etc. Skype or call home. More homework. Dinner. etc…</p>
<p>^:) lol fogfog…I hope you take this in the humorous and kind way I mean it to be, but just for fun I just did an advanced search (where you can search all the posts on CC for a certain word,) and I searched “laundrey” because you talk about it frequently and you always put an ‘e’ in it. So when I put that exact spelling in the search I came up with 30 posts all but one made by you. So if you’re keeping track, you have posted on CC 30 times about laundry! I just thought it was funny, not at all intending to be mean about spelling issues, I have plenty of those myself. Happy weekend!</p>
<p>Pepper - thanks for the update on your son. Sounds like he’s doing well. Sorry the social scene is complicated with over 21 stuff in the city. He’ll find his groove soon. And I feel the academics will come as well. He’s a resourceful kid that works hard! He’ll figure this out. I’m also hoping your father is okay.</p>
<p>Amanda - I gotta give it to you girl…your son is one of a kind!! 
So glad this was a false alarm. </p>
<p>It’s almost 5 o’clock so I’m offering cyber cocktails and about to pour one myself very soon as I’m in for the night. No iphone for me and I’m just a little bit cranky. :mad: So, drinks on me everyone…and passing the chocolate for anyone that could use it on this Friday evening. I have some apple pie here from our apple picking excursion to share as well. Help yourself!!</p>
<p>^^^ hahaha Yalemom15…that is funny.
Must be a glitch in my brain software!!</p>
<p>I used to always spell restaurant incorrectly…</p>
<p>When I was in 4th grade I would spell color - colour…
I remember the teacher telling me I was wrong and I explained that the US spelling excludes the u and other parts of the English-speaking world, the u has been retained. She looked at me like I had 3 heads…</p>
<p>I frequently put french words into italian sentences because french was the first language I learned in school…</p>
<p>Have no clue why I consistently spell the “washing of clothes” incorrectly… 
I guess posting about that is better than posting about many other topics… ;)</p>
<p>Back to the question at hand Yalemom15…
what is your freshman doing on weekends?</p>
<p>Thank you for your good ‘humour’ about it :), it actually occurred to me that it might be an English way to spell laundry!</p>
<p>Sorry to hear about your technology acquisition fail BI, there’s nothing more irritating than expecting to get a fun new gadget and then not getting it, grrrrr. Hope you’re able to secure it soon. Thanks for the chocolate :)</p>
<p>Not to worry, fog! I spent the first 15 years of my professional life typing the word ‘insurnace’, even though I worked in risk management and referred to insurance in every third sentence. It’s a pity that I changed careers about the time spell-check came along. And I agree about the variable spellings of English. I still have to remind myself which side of the Pond I am on when I get to words like honor or color…</p>
<p>Yes, I am a gadget guru so a bit peeved. They didn’t bother to call to say they hadn’t received enough to cover the preorders. Bluedad called to check and they said “Oh, but she can check the apple store”. Yea, right. This was at 2pm. I’ll just wonder down and pick one up!! :rolleyes:</p>
<p>No problem Yalemom15…
If your hobby is spell check, then have at it ;)</p>
<p>sooo what is your freshman doing on the weekends??? Not washing clothes I guess…lol</p>
<p>Highhead…I know, right. I have several words that I revert to a UK spelling over a US one…I am not sure why. Though I read a lot in the early years and many things “stuck”.
Then again sometimes I think of a word that best fits a sentence/situation and if its not English, I have to think about what English word is closest to the exact meaning I am looking for in that instance. Sometimes the best word in English still misses the mark…when an arabic, italian, french etc word is a better fit.</p>
<p>It’s a sickness actually :eek:…but it does come in handy, my proofreading skills command a pretty price!</p>
<p>My freshman is headed to the “Haaahhmptons” this weekend with some new found (and apparently well-housed) friends. His life is so rough, poor baby!</p>
<p>I am trying to keep my mouth shut about the driving, the many hours away, the studies needing attention, blah blah blah. He’s doing well so far, so I’m going to do deep breathing exercises and try to think about other things until I hear that he is safely back in NH on Sunday.</p>
<p>Sounds like your student needs to stay put for sports, that kind of structure is really nice, I’m envious.</p>
<p>Pepper - nice to get an update. Sounds like you had a good time with him back home. He’s resourceful - will just need to hang in there with those tough classes.</p>
<p>Amanda - oy! How/why did he think of texting u as he ran? That’s one text I would rather not have gotten! D texted me a few weeks ago a picture of her dorm lounge window with a bullet hole in it!! Then called me right away to tell me to NOT freak out. Right!!</p>
<p>OK…question for all you parents. D texts me every day - sometimes several times during the day. She’s phono-phobic - won’t call, but will have a long conversation over text messages. Sometimes, it can be a bit annoying, but I’ll take contact and info anyway I get it. Yesterday, she asked me if she was texting me too much - if she was too dependent on me. My answer was No. She texts me a lot, but often she is passing on info about her day, something she saw, something she wants to buy etc. There have been occasional conversations about a test - stressing out about it. But, she hasn’t been waiting for me to make decisions - she’s making her own, doing all the things she wants to on her own, but then just letting me know. Is that being too dependent?? She decided today she wasn’t going to text me as much :(</p>
<p>My father is actually showing quite a bit of improvement-thanks to all for your kind thoughts. My mother seems to have settled down a bit and both were OK for visits Monday-it was a true blessing.</p>
<p>emilybet the kids hang out in the dorms or find things to do. However, he has this strong need to go to a “college party”-which means all the craziness that goes along with them. He told me he has a friend whose friend goes to another school in Boston (well Cambridge) and they are going to get into a party over there this weekend-he said he heard they were crazy. I asked him to define crazy and he mentioned they have dancers. I certainly do not like the sound of that-I hope if he goes to something like that he has the good sense to get out of there before things do get crazy. I hope after going to one he realizes they aren’t all they are cracked up to be.</p>
<p>Tonight though he just texted me he is going to a hockey game-that is THE sport there.</p>
<p>arisamp I will get a text now and then expressing distress over a grade or a test-no big deal I don’t think. We have been their sounding boards their whole lives-I don’t think that will change overnight just because they are away at school. I think most parents will know if it becomes too much and the kid needs a little nudge away-I know I am not there yet. I think this is more of a process of separation than an event-they go to school and everything has to change right away. That’s what I pictured it as-the reality is as time goes by he is moving closer to independence but the way he needs to do it. One of his best friends parents told me they never hear from her-she doesn’t even respond to texts. That doesn’t surprise me nor do I think it is wrong-it would be nice if she communicated once in a while but what do I know?</p>
<p>arisamp, I don’t know that there’s any one-size-fits-all answer about what’s too dependent, but obviously your D is feeling self-conscious for one reason or another, about the frequent contact. My S is phono-phobic too but we chat sometimes on IM (which we both find easier than texting) – usually every few days. One thing you might ask your D is if she doesn’t want to text you as often, could she try to “save up” her news and send you a “newsy email” once a week (on the weekend or whenever is good for her) similar to what you might get from a weekly phone call from a kid who likes talking on the phone. That’s what I’m hoping to settle in on with my S as well. The occasional IMs are nice, but I feel like I never really get a nice newsy update.</p>
<p>Good luck working out the balance of communication that keeps you both happy!</p>
<p>@pepper: Glad things are getting easier with your parents. Even if it’s only temporary, you’ll get strength from having a break.</p>
<p>@aris and others thinking about communication: my D calls occasionally to cry on my shoulder, but I know she uses me to vent so I’m not worried. She FB chats with H when she wants advice (how did we wind up as such gender- stereotyped parents??!) and texts about things she needs instantly. There is no follow up, but we are lucky that we have several FB friends in common so we see the odd conversation showing that she is actually doing well and is only using us as her safe place.
@Yalemom: The Hamptons, wow! When D was tapped for acapella a few weeks ago, she was happy she had no weekend plans that week because they were going on a retreat ‘to Exeter’. I assume NH. Never heard anything about how they got there, how they got back, nor any $ involved. Decided not to think about it and she is still alive, so I think I need to let go of that. Next weekend she is going to stay with friends in the Bronx…</p>
<p>Thanks for the cyber cocktail BI! Just after 5 here on west coast so perfect timing and DH is pacing around here waiting for the FedEx guy and…THE phone! Problem is we have plans to go out tonight and must sign for phone. He keeps checking website (phone on truck), listening, for truck noises, looking at clock. I said, “We should just go out and they can deliver it tomorrow or Monday.” He was not pleased :)</p>
<p>Happy weekend all - and looking forward to the stories from those of you at parents weekends and from the rest who know where their kids will be - like the Hamptons. As usual, I have no idea, but assuming all is well…</p>