Parents of the HS Class of 2011 - We're awesome!

Parents of HS Class of 20xx
7201

<p>FLMathmom, Great advice thanks, no updates on the tax thing, so far found nothing crazy, hopefully its just a typo.</p>

<p>Yalemom, LOL Husband is the very laid back, worry about it when it happens kind of person, I am the worrier in this family but maybe it will start me running!!!</p>

<p>Taking a real estate course into the second week, will dash up to pick up D3 around the 1st of May, not sure what she will be able to store or what I will have to throw into the car and bring home for the summer! Enjoy the day!</p>

7202

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<p>A few years ago when our son applied for a job at a national chain, we got a call that said that someone in California had applied for a job using his SS#. We did a search and found that a lady in CA had been pretty much living her life with Son’s SS#. The horrible thing is that we were told that to protect HER privacy, the SS admin can never tell us how it turned out. (I guess to give her the benefit of the doubt they both could have been issued the same #.) But I think she came into the US illegally. We check his credit every year, he has filed his own tax return the last two years and it hasn’t been rejected.</p>

<p>It was such an odd feeling to have the lady’s name, address and phone number. I just wanted to fly to LA to confront her.</p>

7203

<p>missypie, How did you do a search? I would love to do some investigating on our own!</p>

<p>IRS won’t tell us anything except that one of us (me or my husband) was claimed as a dependent on someone’s taxes. As I also mentioned our medical information along with Social Security numbers was stolen from a truck in Texas. Along with several million other’s. Apparently it was being transported on some sort of microchips or something to storage. (Military medical records) If the thieves actually knew what they had they could have sold our SS#'s to people who needed them. (illegal??) OR it could just be a typo! That is what I hope!</p>

7204

<p>EAO</p>

<p>After our luggage was stolen with passports etc…we had spoken with a Secret Service guy/Treasury.
He advised that we check all of our families SS’s etc with Experian etc…to be sure our stuff wasn’t sold–especially because passports with infant pics awere at the time big $$ for people to take a kid out of the US illegally…This was before the changes in passports/records…at the time the passport had our k2s pic (6 mos old–)</p>

<p>He also advised we use AmEx’s service credit aware…which we have done for the last 15 yrs. He used it himself because it will flag anytime the SS# is used to open ANY time of bank/credit acct etc.</p>

<p>Certainly a royal PITA hope it was simply a typo!</p>

7205

<p>Long 10 hour day in car with only a 20 minute break to pick boychild up and stop at FA to drop off hard copy of tax returns. Great convo’s on the way home. He was a pretty mature kid in high school but I am amazed at how much more grown up he’s become in one year.</p>

7206

<p>I’m a lawyer, so I had one of our legal assistants check. I later had our whole family checked and learned that an entire extended Iranian family had used H’s SSN in Chicago and North Carolina. But when the LA started charging, it only cost $75. If you know any lawyers or paralegals, I’m sure they’ll run one check for free.</p>

7207

<p>One of my employees just told me that his accountant called him, since someone else had filed a tax return using his SSN. Sounds very similar to EAO’s situation. He is planning on making a few calls today to see what he needs to do.</p>

<p>It is scary that this is happening so frequently.</p>

7208

<p>Gsmomma - you might want to look a few pages back to my links to the IRS site and my other suggestions. As we are getting closer to the tax filing deadline, the frequency of tax fraud is increasing. Hopefully the IRS will implement new safeguards next year to reduce the frequency of this problem. It would not be difficult. They should not refund any money to taxpayers whose address or bank account changed from the prior year without verifying th change independently. I would think most people woul prefer to wait for a refund than deal with tax fraud.</p>

7209

<p>Flmathmom–Doesn’t the IRS check whether the same name/ssn was used the previous year? I don’t understand why they are catching current year issues but not flagging them from previous years. Seems crazy that person x can use the ssn for filing for 10-30 years then all of a sudden person y uses it in current year and it wasn’t caught that person x had used that one for many years. Seems the fraud would stand out as probably belonging to person y. (It would be more understandable when a youth’s ssn is stolen since they may not have filed before).</p>

<p>Well, I gave up on DS finding a solution to the move-out issue (we will be out of the country when he needs to move out). So I contacted the school and they will provide him with a temporary parking pass. I can take a car up to him before we leave and he can pack and drive home! I’m happy. Him, not so much. His response “well, I hope I don’t get lost” or something to that effect. There’s a gps in the car and an ezpass. How much easier can it get (oh, and I’ll make sure the tank is full). Obviously DS isn’t too worried about being independent–since he’d rather not have to deal with such things.</p>

<p>Hope the IRS issues get cleared up. It’s scary if it’s happening to multiple people. Our stuff was supposedly compromised like EAO’s, so it could happen to us. Computers are a wonderful thing, but the data that can be stolen is scary.</p>

7210

<p>VAMom, we’ll have a similar end-of-year situation with ShawD. I’m taking ShawWife to Barcelona for a long weekend which is the same weekend when ShawD needs to vacate her room and move to: 1) a new apartment; 2) a summer sublet; 3) the condo we’ve bought; or 4) home until we pick 1, 2, or 3. She doesn’t drive yet (that is a project for the summer, if her vision is up to it). She’s actually visiting the eye doctor today. We can leave our van but she will have to find someone to drive. If she were at a co-ed school, sufficient eye-batting has always led to male help if needed. (As an aside, why is eye-batting attractive?) The worst case is probably for us to hire Man with Van Inc.</p>

<p>She also has a ticket that has to be used by the end of that month to Europe (or someplace else) if she can find a travel companion. She only has that next week because summer term starts up the following week. She could stay for free with relatives in London, but would love to go somewhere new (or Paris). She could meet up with ShawWife/me after Barcelona, but that would be a lot less interesting for her. Normally she’d be delighted to meet us but she’s been coming home almost every weekend this term so we don’t have absence making her heart grow fonder.</p>

7211

<p>Hi All</p>

<p>VAMom…I used to drive 14 hrs to and from college…as a freshman. It can be done. With a little planning etc. Back in the day I had maps from AAA that had yellow highlighter lines and lots of small bills/change for tolls etc. So with EAPass and GPS --and likely a smartphone he will be good to go.
I had a small igloo cooler on the front seat with sodas and snacks for inbeteen gas/food stops.
Also doing it got to be easy as I got older, it never occirred to me that I couldn’t/shouldn’t be able to do it. kwim?
It is realy nice the you were able to arrange a parking pass etc for the car with the school. That is great!</p>

<p>On another subject…
today DH and I, alng with the academic dean, english teacher (that “winner” of a guy) and the dept head meet to discuss things and this quarter. Yes k2 will be there…</p>

<p>Any advice? Especially from parents of twice exceptional kids?</p>

7212

<p>fogfog, I found that collecting, providing and summarizing studies on twice exceptional kids (and the meanings, effects and implications of the LDs) and how to work with them was often helpful. That can give people an excuse to be move off their beliefs/prejudices without appearing to have given in.</p>

7213

<p>VAmom - you are absolutely correct. One would expect the IRS computers to flag any tax return which has a refund and a change of address or change of bank for deposit. At a minimum I would expect a match of a W2 or 1099 name, address, SSN and dollar amount to be done before processing the refund. I think in their haste to get kudos for speedy refund processing, accurate processing falls by the wayside. You don’t hear them reporting the number of refunds sent to the wrong person. I would think it would be much easier to do it right the first time than try to undo it and then redo it the second time. Maybe they are trying to justify the need for more staff.</p>

7214

<p>Sorry, I have not kept up with everything going on here, I went back a couple pages and gave up. </p>

<p>Shawbridge - no idea why eye batting is attractive. I do know of a High School Sr who is looking for odd jobs and might be interested in helping your D. This boy used to play on H rec basketball team and is looking for money for college. He has done odd jobs at our house, spring cleanup, is helping our D with her basketball skills (he was on varsity team), etc. Nice, nice kid. Let me know if you want his contact info. We live in Braintree. Oh, btw, I am dying to get back to London, let me know if she would be interested in an old lady for a companion. :)</p>

<p>VaMom- I am sure your S will be fine. That first long drive can be scary if you have always sat in the passenger seat. </p>

<p>I think the IRS has gotten so much better and quicker at catching duplicate SSN that we see it happen more frequently. It has to stink when it does. My fingers are crossed I never have to deal with it. </p>

<p>emilybee - It is amazing how much our kids have grown up/matured. I love my young man. oh, your S will love the car. We are in the process of selling my Fathers car, which he gave to my S 1.5 years ago and now wants back. He won’t get it back (long story), but I don’t see how we can survive with S home, working and without a car. So we are in the market for something to get him through the next 3 years. </p>

<p>EAO- good luck with real estate course! And I hope you get the IRS Stuff cleared up quickly and without too much hassle. </p>

<p>fog - I have to know, how did the team do??? </p>

<p>siemom - My S also lacks the skills to advocate for himself. I saw the courses he registered for for next fall but then looked up the professors, 2 of them are given terrible ratings. I suggested he find out who the good ones were, but I am pretty sure he won’t ask around. :(</p>

<p>FLMathMom -thanks for good advice. I just photocopied front and back of all the cards I have.</p>

7215

<p>Fog, we (always a few kids going from NY to Boulder and vice versa) use to drive 24 hours straight. Did it all 4 years. I flew by myself at the start of freshman yr to a campus sight unseen, too and took the bus from the Denver airport to Boulder. I flew home maybe once after that, but all other trips were by car with a bunch of other kids. My favorite trip was in a friends humungous Blazer, which I wasn’t allowed to drive, so I sat in the way back and drank beer the whole trip. He was from Pittsburgh and was schlepping back cases of Iron City to school. </p>

<p>Mamom, amazing the growth in one yr. And he is now thinking of grad school for IR and an MBA. He also thinks he might want to go to a BRIC country for jr. abroad. I am barracking for Brazil. </p>

<p>And a head-ups to all 2015 with girls. According to boychild, finals week brings out the worst in them. He said all the girls were in the hallways crying on the phone to their moms about how stressed out they were. So be prepared.</p>

7216

<p>emilybee: my daughter must be “advanced”; had the “I am sooo stressed out” phone call already last week…can’t wait for finals…</p>

7217

<p>mamom, thanks. I’ll see how plans progress but may indeed contact you.</p>

7218

<p>I have mentioned that my very high IQ S was diagnosed with EFD last April. He saw a psychologist all summer, but still had issues when he went off to college. Psychologist at S’s college did not want to see S. She cancelled first appt. I called her and told her about his issues and had S’s psychologist called her. She told me based on the reports I sent from the testing done, and the merit awards he received (all test based) that she didn’t understand why he could have a problem, he is too smart a kid. She finally relented to see him after much badgering. Based on S’s report back to me, they talked and she told him to come back if he neede to see her. Of course, he thought everything was “fine.” I insisted he go back, and nothing happened at second meeting. He was still doing “fine”. haha. It was obvious she relied on S to tell her how he was doing. </p>

<p>I have looked into a local (to school) EF coach and private (out of school) psychologist, to no avail. It is like finding a needle in a haystack. Online research seems to be useless. Very frustrating. I can schedule him to see someone out there, but really I am just pulling a name from a list. </p>

<p>He had to drop a class last semester. This semester he had to drop another. I saw S’s old montessori teacher a few weeks ago at a fundraiser for the montessori school he attended for 9 years. Teacher told us about his son who was recently put on ADHD meds. He told us all grades went up immediately. It was like a switch was flipped. I had asked S to see his psychologist over xmas break, but he said psychologist was completely booked. After talking to the former teacher, I felt obligated to look into meds and made an appt for earlier this week.</p>

<p>Because S went to a friends house over Easter break who lives near the school he wasn’t scheduled to come home til the middle of May. We decided to spend the money and to fly him home for one day to see the psychologist and decide on a plan of action. After a 2 hour visit, psychologist agreed meds was the next step. Unfortunately, he is not a medical doc and could not prescribe. So we had to ask pediatrician, who is totally against the ADHD diagnosis. (Another long story, I have asked in past). Finally after talking with psychologist today, pediatrician agreed to give S a 30 day script. We will see how it goes. </p>

<p>It saddens me to see my high IQ, out of this world smart kid not succeed. So furstrating. Psychologist had suggested some stuff S could do, such as seeing profs during office hours, group study sessions, etc but S was adament he would not do group study sessions. …sigh I really think finance (his current major) is not for him. I see him as a deep thinker who studies history, english, etc. He is set on this finance though. Finance is one of those exacting majors which does not require any deep thinking, just meticulous work. Not sure where we will end up but I feel like the problem is being worked. </p>

<p>S may end up commuting to the local state school in Boston next fall, I don’t know, but I hope we will finally see and end to all this frustration.</p>

7219

<p>Mamom: You must feel very frustrated over your son’s situation. I hope that you see some changes from the medication. My friend’s intelligent D with ADHD struggled in school until she stated taking medication and saw great improvement. </p>

<p>Rodney: Sorry to hear about the stressed out phone call. We got one of them last semster. I laughed at Emilybee’s S’s decription of the girls on his floor.</p>

7220

<p>mamom, sorry to hear about that. EFD seems like one of the harder things to deal with. Ritalin made a huge difference to ShawD (ADHD) and Adderall a modest difference to ShawSon. EF issues are typically the hardest thing for kids with LDs. </p>

<p>ShawSon picked up the organizational stuff over time – he now plans ahead and no longer exhibits magical thinking. However, he has a coach generally who has been amazingly helpful with his LDs. She is in our town and does it all by reading his emails and talking to him. To a certain extent, he’s learning to do what I do – rely heavily on an executive assistant. He’ll just have to rise to the jobs that have one or start his own company. But someone like that, even over the phone, could be really useful – if she has access to the information like his emails.</p>

<p>I think the psychologist at the school is guilty of malpractice. How can anyone who is supposed to help kids at school not recognize kids who have done well in HS given a certain level of support at home not realize that without that support they are going to have problems. My own experience is that many people don’t really believe one can have a really high IQ and LDs. We encountered that over and over again.</p>