<p>We aren’t FB friends with my son for the same reason your son says Mutti2012. But he did tell my husband “Call me anytime” and we text/email a lot. </p>
<p>He even, totally unprompted, called my parents to tell them how he was doing since when he saw them in the summer they asked him to keep in touch. That gives him a big BINGO point. :)</p>
<p>Mutti2012, I just decided to let S & D have FB as their own turf with their peers, thinking about how I wouldn’t have wanted my parents following me that closely when I was their age. I have tried to get them to make their FB stuff private, except to their hundreds of “friends”, of course. Your S may be wise to recognize the uncontrollability of social media. I do follow some of my kids’ friends on Twitter, those that follow me, and it is kind of jarring to read some of their tweets, thrown out to the world as if only a few friends would see it. Wife and I misread one that was meant to be humorous as pointing to a real problem. Just didn’t have the context for understanding. Anyway, their language is really bad, much worse than they would use with us in person. Not something to be glad about, but mine used be pretty bad too. It’s the way they talk. Better not to know everything, I think. Just hope they learned something from us before they left. Oh yes, I remember that one school (Clark?) told their freshmen to defriend their parents. That seemed to be going too far.</p>
<p>Oh Mutti - not cool! Although I will say, you are now spared seeing things like what was on my S’s facebook status when his buds hacked in and wrote something under his name. As Forest would say, that’s all I have to say about that.</p>
<p>Last weekend, I text D “so, have you had any tests yet?”
D “It’s only been 2 weeks!”
Me, truly shocked “Really? It seems like it’s been so much longer.”</p>
<p>Youngest brother keeps us up to date with anything we should know about on my guys FB pages. We’ve never actually signed up for an account ourselves nor do I feel the need to do so. I suppose we’re partially “technical Amish.”</p>
<p>Middle son thinks his test went well - “much easier than I expected.” Of course, we’ll know for sure when he gets his grade back on Monday. Since he might go pre-med, I hope he’s correct. Instead of calling he sent us a message telling us he had to finish a lab report, eat supper, and study some Chem. Today is the day he goes from morning to evening with small breaks for lunch and supper due to labs and recitations. I think he’s finally settled into the “school” part of it all. The good thing is he tells us he’s still enjoying it all. ;)</p>
<p>I heard from my D yesterday. I’ve been getting at least a few texts or a phone call every day, but it is usually prompted by her needing to know something. Yesterday was to discuss where all her money has gone so quickly! She got lucky and my dad sent her a check just so she could have some “blow” money. Good thing! She is not anticipating any more major expenses though, thank goodness.</p>
<p>In the course of that conversation, I did discover she joined the Columbia marching band though. “I needed white pants for marching band” I did tell her that it feels odd to not be part of her daily life. She is a really social kid who likes to stay busy but she’s also a kid who needs some “alone” time and I know that can be tough in the dorm. I asked her how she is doing with that and she said it is ok. Her roommate’s grandma lives in the city so she went to stay with her grandma this last weekend. She also said she goes to the study lounge a lot and nobody really ever goes there so she can usually be alone there when she needs to be. She is Skyping with friends from home regularly, apparently, but does so late at night “I’m nocturnal”.</p>
<p>I would hear nothing if it weren’t for FB - Mutti, that stinks!</p>
<p>My own mother got a FB account at the urging of her sister. My DS, being the kind grandson that he is, accepted grandma’s friend invitation. I’ve had to ask my mother several times to please not comment on every conversation that shows up on my son’s wall. There’s nothing that kills a FB conversation quite like grandma chiming in with “Oh, that sounds so neat-o!” Poor kid!</p>
<p>It’s time to start my day and pack up the van for the long drive to deliver S’s worldly possessions to him. He’s been out of contact during the pre-orientation trip, so I’m interested to hear the details of hiking, especially during the cooler weather that we have been having.</p>
<p>This has been a quiet week for H and I, a preview of the empty nest. I’m starting to fill in our schedules with activities to try to find the right mix for us. I hope that this will make the goodbyes somewhat easier when we leave S. It will be good to see him again.</p>
<p>Are you ready, SteveC, pcaz, GeminiMom?</p>
<p>Good luck to the last launchers! Thanks for keeping us updated, Pinot!</p>
<p>2016barnardmom - I got the panicked call about white pants/jeans too. Everything else she can handle! How funny.</p>
<p>As a Barnard alum, I’m enjoying the reports from the parents of Barnard women. The Columbia Marching Band is a fantastically creative ragtag group with an emphasis on fun! IIRC, anyone can join with the instrument of their choice (and the instruments are often “instruments” 
) </p>
<p>The thing about the FB defriending is that I brought it on myself by commenting from time about the random things that pop up on my account from his. I should have just shut up; now I’m paying the price!</p>
<p>Move-in yesterday ended up going quite smoothly even though we didn’t get over to the dorm until around 11 or so. They had several students to help unload the cars and as we walked up to the entrance of the dorm to check in, all of the resident staff started chanting my son’s name! Apparently, as the students walk in, they quickly consult the Stanford facebook of all the new students in that dorm so they can shout out their names–it was just wonderful and so welcoming. I think it really helped to ease my son’s anxiety. Being a boy, he didn’t have all that much stuff, so while DH moved the car to the parking lot on the other side of campus, he and I managed to unpack and set up his room. We didn’t get to meet his roommate right away–he’s an international student from Lesotho, so he had already been there since Saturday. My son was hoping for an international roommate so was excited about that. We did meet him later, but only briefly, and because he was already there we didn’t get to meet his parents (so no RM parent stories!). He was very pleased with his room layout–the dorm complex he’s in is the only one at Stanford that has two-room doubles. His RM had already chosen the outer room, so my son got the inner, more private room. I’m a little worried that since he isn’t very social, he may close himself up in there too often, so I suggested he keep the door between the rooms open as much as possible. </p>
<p>After move-in, we ate together in his dining hall (good selection of food), he registered to vote, and then I went to a panel of parents of current students who talked about letting our kids go. Surprisingly, there were really no weird questions from any of the parents there. After that was over, I met back up with DS, DH, and DD and we walked around the campus a little and then went to the convocation. It was during that, for the first time all day, that I started tearing up. Of course it was worse later, when we went back to his dorm for a program there to meet all of the resident staff, etc., and then had to say good-bye. I had tried to hold it together the whole day but when I hugged him the tears came. Unfortunately, I think that also made him tear up. He was sweet to reassure me that Thanksgiving would be here before I knew it. So that’s how we left him, in the care of his new Stanford family. Since last night, I keep tearing up every so often, but I know that’s normal. Hopefully, he’ll be so busy over the next few days with orientation activities that he won’t have time to be sad and I really do think he’s in the right place. We leave shortly for the drive back home–I think once we get back I’ll be a mess again because the house will seem so empty without him there.</p>
<p>Mom2jl - Glad to hear the launch went well :)</p>
<p>Congrats Mom2jl, sounds like it went great.<br>
Mutti, great advice re: no frequent FB parental posting. My S (and his younger sister, who is a HS sophomore) are under the mistaken impression that I very rarely go on FB. If only they knew… I have had to bite my tongue (or keyboard, rather, in the case of S) rather than reveal my very stalkerish tendencies.</p>
<p>PN,</p>
<p>My son’s roommate hacked into his FB account twice. The first time, he changed his relationship status to “in a domestic partnership.” The second time (and son says he left the room literally for three minutes), he went from being single to being in a relationship. He says the hackers are everywhere at MIT.</p>
<p>Mim,</p>
<p>My son also isn’t communicating too much but I know it’s because he’s just insanely busy. I am betting that’s the case for your son, as well. </p>
<p>My dh had the very good idea of calling him Sunday morning. Normally, we’re on our way to church but my youngest was sick and my dh had a headache, so we didn’t make it. We talked with my son for 20 minutes or so, and it helped us catch up with him.</p>
<p>We don’t except that he’ll call, so we call him. I text him at least every other day even if I don’t hear back. (Sometimes I do, sometimes I don’t) Hopefully, we’ll Skype again in a week or two.</p>
<p>I know he’s feeling pressure on his time on many fronts. Friends from back home want to talk/Skype/text and then he’s got a boatload of friends and activities on campus in addition to his classes, work, homework, church, and ECs. So, I don’t want to put extra pressure on him.</p>
<p>His analysis class is the toughest. There are only two freshmen in the class. The beauty of MIT is that there are no grades first semester (it’s either pass or retake), so my son’s goal is simply to pass his classes. I think that’s wise.</p>
<p>Mom2jl, congratulations on a great launch. We have a young friend at Stanford and it seems like the perfect place for her.</p>
<p>That should have read, “We don’t <em>expect</em> that he’ll call.” :-)</p>
<p>Yes, my D was quite excited when she found out that Barnard students could join the Columbia Marching Band. Brown’s band is similar and it was one of the things that had appealed to her about Brown. </p>
<p>She called again today to find out if I had stashed AAA batteries for her calculator in any of her stuff while packing. I didn’t. In fact, the calculator was the thing that I saw when we did the last minute room walk through and said “Don’t you need this?” </p>
<p>She was also very excited that one of the Freakonomics authors was a speaker for her Sociology class today.</p>
<p>Itsthattime - </p>
<p>How is your child liking the course/environment?
Typically how many credits do students take in the first semester in Columbia university? Are they preregistered for the classes even in the spring semester or only in the fall semester?
Is the add/drop procedure simple?
How does the foreign language requirement waiver work or are the four foreign language semesters mandatory? Any pointers to the links will be helpful</p>