<p>Creekland, my older D (now a senior) was in a triple her first year. Both of her roommates applied to be RAs for their sophomore year (D did not). One of them made it. For her friend who made it, it was not worth it. She found being on call 24 hours a day to be exhausting and it frequently meant sacrificing her academic pursuits. It might have been her school culture/expectations of the position and maybe not all schools have similar burdens. I suggest your S observe his RA’s time commitment/interruptions closely. I do think it could be a valuable leadership experience and the skills needed to be a good RA would serve well in life.</p>
<p>Amtc - I just so sorry your D’s roommate issues. Such unnecessary stress! </p>
<p>Creekland - How cool that your S has been contacted about being an RA! I’m not sure exactly what the benefits are at UR - would he get a free room?</p>
<p>Wordworld what a great idea, thanks! </p>
<p>Update - she typed out the email and then tossed it, decided not to send it. Then she called last night from outside in the rain furious with her roommate and her inability to study in her room. And this is a kid who likes noise and commotion while studying! They are no longer polite to each other and are moving toward barely tolerating each other. Since my daughter hates conflict and is so non-confrontational (with everyone except her mother of course) she tries to stay away as much as possible. Not so possible once winter comes!</p>
<p>It’s Parents Weekend this weekend so I told her I would call today to set up appointments for the two of us with the appropriate housing people for Friday and her father and I would just come out earlier than planned so we could be there with her to fix this situation. She’s worried she’ll be the newcomer in any dorm arrangement so no one will like her, she’s worried the kids in her current dorm won’t like her because she moved, etc. etc. I think none of that will happen, at worst all these kids are way too self-involved to even concern themselves with her moving out, at best, they’ll be jealous because she can’t be the only one feeling the way she does. She doesn’t think anyone will want to swap because her dorm has the worst bathroom situation, I can’t convince her that not everyone measures a dorm by the bathrooms (that’s truly how she chose her dorm - number of kids who share the bathroom).</p>
<p>Oh and since the two plays she was in are now over she feels she doesn’t have enough extra-curriculars to keep her out of the room like when she was in the two plays and that’s making it worse as well. I suggested she join other activities now that she has more free time but she came back with the “everyone already knows each other and I’ll be the outsider” line. I’ll have to ask what her friends are doing for outside activities and see if any of those would work for her but the truth is, there aren’t too many things that take as much time as a play.</p>
<p>At the same time her older sister is trying to decide if she should graduate in December instead of June. Whatever happened to my empty-nesting? I’m really getting tired of phone call discussions squeezed in between classes or rehearsals or whatever. Calgon take me away!!!</p>
<p>Thanks again everyone.</p>
<p>Oh amtc, I sure hope it works out. Please let us know, I’ll be thinking about you and D.</p>
<p>Speaking of RM stuff…S casually mentioned to me by text that he’s staying in a single room on a girl’s floor in the honors dorm right now.</p>
<p>After some further clarification via text, it appears he’s been sexiled! He was dealing with RM’s GF being over every night but it got old so *he *suggested GF and he switch rooms “until RM and GF get tired of living together”.</p>
<p>The bulk of his stuff is still in his room, he’s just moved toiletries and basics, he said, to her room. He seems good with it for now.</p>
<p>It’s fortunate that he and RM have gotten along well, indeed been friends, since move-in. I think if he comes to dislike the situation he’ll resolve it himself.</p>
<p>BTW, he hadn’t heard the term “sexiled”. Thanks CC for that, the term is probably spreading through a new group of freshmen even as we speak because yours truly couldn’t resists texting it to him :)</p>
<p>amtc -sorry for your daughters very unpleasant sounding roommate experience. As I recall this has been hard for her from day one, and it sounds like your daughter is naturally a little insecure about living away from home, etc. I’m sure this doesn’t help. Good luck getting it resolved - the situations screams for a roommate change, plus roommate agreements for any who don’t have them. The RA should understand the concept of party rooms, and how you should not have someone make their room into party room over the objections of roommate. The question is, how has she objected? This is a time your daughter needs to step up her assertiveness with roommate and possibly RA as well and make sure they know exactly what she objects to and what she would be happy with in terms of time in room, etc. I hope it works out when you’re visiting.</p>
<p>So D1 calls this morning to ask if she can come home this weekend to watch D2 swim in a big meet Saturday. Uhhhhh, what about swim practice for you Saturday morning? Oh–it’s fall break this weekend and no class on Friday, swim practice optional on Saturday. I checked her school calendar a few weeks ago and did not see it. She just found out this morning after a prof said “see you Monday”! HAHAHAHA. So I will pick her up Friday night and back on Sunday. Her little sis will be thrilled!</p>
<p>3 hours later, D1 calling again. Laundry. “Can I put the big chenille blanket in the machine with the comforter?” Uh, don’t think they will both fit in one load. “Oh. Right, mom, I was trying to eye-ball it, didn’t think to try it and guess what, they don’t both fit”. Okay, then.</p>
<p>Enjoy having your D home, dentmom!</p>
<p>Good news for you, Dentmom4! </p>
<p>I just learned that my S is definitely foregoing his semester break camping trip and coming home. Yay for me and H (and the dog)! He already arranged a ride and will be here tonight by dinnertime. I knew I would be happy to hear that news but I am REALLY happy. There is just something about having your kid at home that feels good. Oh uh … need to do that grocery run on the way home from work!</p>
<p>I don’t know if I am going to get spoiled seeing a kid two weekends in a row, but it will tide me over until Thanksgiving.</p>
<p>I’m hoping to catch a few hours with my S alone (sorry H) for him to tell me what’s really on his mind. This is where my my night owl habits come in handy.</p>
<p>Did anyone see Modern Family last night, the first episode? Phil and Claire are dropping Hailey off at college, the dorm room move-in scene is horribly hilarious.<br>
Claire also had a classic line re: a family celebration for Hailey starting college and Lily starting kindergarten-- She objects to the joint celebration because “Hailey going to college is a MIRACLE, Lily going to kindergarten is the LAW.”
Side stories were also pretty funny, hope you all can find the episode on demand or online, it was the episode called “Schooled”</p>
<p>I thought they were spot on with the whole college drop off thing (except the part where Phill grabbed the roommates behind lol). I cried LIKE A BABY from the point that the parents left until the end. Apparently too soon for me to watch…</p>
<p>I’m enjoying the stories of fall break visits. </p>
<p>S was thinking about coming home this weekend, however he has connected with the frisbee team and was invited to play in a tournament this weekend. Since we thought it was too early for a visit so I’m glad he isn’t taking the long drive home, however I would have loved to see him. </p>
<p>We are visiting for parent’s weekend next week, so we will get a chance to spend some time with him. I’m curious to learn how things are going in his classes. He seems to think everything is under control, but is involved in a number of non-academic activities. I guess it will all be a part of the learning process.</p>
<p>Hey everyone! can anyone remember who it was on this thread that lives in Rochester, NY?</p>
<p>PinotNoir wrote:
No, but I can Google with the best of 'em–skier29 and kttmom. :)</p>
<p>Thanks SteveC!</p>
<p>OHMom0f2 – I may very well be missing something here, but if the RM’s GF has a single, why aren’t the lovebirds roosting there? It seems especially unfair that your son should be sexiled in this situation…but it also sounds like he is handling it with creativity and aplomb. (Hopefully the relationship will be very short-lived!)</p>
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<p>Ummm, SteveC – how the heck did you do that? (And if it involves crazy parameters and such, don’t even bother…) ;)</p>
<p>Tessie I had that exact same thought the next day! I suspect, however, that due to the way he announced this temporary switch, that he’s rather enjoying his single on a girl’s floor of the “deluxe” dorm :)</p>
<p>WalkingTessie wrote:
Depends on what you call “crazy.”</p>
<p>site:collegeconfidential.com “parents of the high school class of 2012” live in Rochester</p>
<p>Second entry. :)</p>
<p>So OHMomof2, what bathroom is he using???</p>
<p>ohmom - no rules against a boy living in on all girls floor?</p>